You typed:
blog
(Thursday, November 30, 2006-)
+11:16 PM]*
xoxo~
Now Playing: Akon - Smack That/I Wanna Love You
I'm so fucking tired of Cogswell. It annoys me so much. Fucking reminds me of being in high school ALL over again. God jesus fucking christ.
Yeah, i know...shut up - there's only a semester left.
I'm ranting. Let me fucking rant.
I just want to be ALONE for 5 fucking minutes of my GODDAMN life. I just drove home...and Damon wasn't there. That was kinda like, "eh, that's funny...he's not home." but honestly, i went straight to my bedroom, set up my laptop and started to blog. Right when i typed blogger ctrl+enter, he got home. I know, i should be excited that he's home...but i just want everyone to fucking leave me alone, it's not even funny.
Now Playing: Augustana - Hotel Roosevelt
NO, you really don't understand. You think you do...but you have no fucking idea.
1. I want to be single. [not really...but i just want the totally alone feeling]. Iono, i'm feeling so smothered by all the wrong people.
2. If i were single, i'd want to date. Not for a relationship, but just hanging out, having a good time. People NOT from my fucking godforsaken school... There's one exception, but I'm not even sure that's a good idea.
Now Playing: Augustana - Boston [god i love this fucking song.]
There are just too many strings attached to it causing my defense mechanism to start up and I honestly give up. I just drop it and deal with the loss. Yeah, he's waay worth it, but I doubt i'd ever be worth it to him. I'm not what he's looking for. Anddd there are wayyy better...more compatible people out there for him. [<= that's what i keep telling myself.]
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?!!!!!!!?!!! Why can't i turn it off!?! SHIT GODDAMNIT.
Now Playing: Augustana - Stars and Boulevards
3. Lol, i'd honestly consider dating 3 people from my guild. Not like intimately dating, but knowing my habits...probably really geeky and/or silly. I'd <3 to puzzle fight w/ Sho, watch a niners game w/ Burg, or play an RTS/RPG w/ Tim.
Hmm...i'm not sure if i'd even consider anyone else in the list o' datees.
"Beautiful?"
Eh, beautiful's just something to look at. We'd never work out. LoL, he said "oh..." to my giants jersey. /slap.
I know you all are going to hate my ass for saying this last one. I'd actually consider koichi. We totally wouldn't work out - but it'd be fun, i guess. We're so goddamn identical, it's like...you never have to worry if they understand what you're talking about...or if they find the same things funny or not. Maybe too identical, /shrug who knows?
I miss him. We were such good friends; losing a friend that knew absolutely everything about you at one point sucks. Yeah I got married and we stopped being friends. He didn't approve.
***
Okay I guess back on subject...I blogged because of my pent up frustration. Damon's going through this depression thing. He's been going through it for about a year now. It's not like a gay emo depression...it's just a loss of excitement/happiness/sadness thing. He's just dull all the time...and isn't excited about anything. He also gets quite irritated easily.
I shouldn't even complain about it, but I feel as though if I don't blog about it...it'll stay pent up and hurt more, I guess. I can't bitch about this to my friends. It's so fucking annoying. I used to talk to Koichi about it...but then he'd get all testosteroney and then "damon's a fucking...this or that". ARGH.
I don't ever feel appreciated or loved anymore, I guess. Like, he could really care less if I existed or not. I know it's just this stupid depression thing that he's going through...and it'll pass. It just hurts that cleaning the toilet or seeing me have the equivalent excitement level. /cry
GAR.
I'm so tired of this feeling alone shit, but in actuality...there are PEOPLE all the fuck around me. I'm ALONE, yet smothered by people.
If i have to be alone, i want to be alone alone. I want to choose the people who can keep me company...and throw everyone else on nuke/isolation island.
You know that first kiss feeling? I want that again. :[ The romance, the sparks, the stars in the sky, and the total infatuation.
OMFG i can't believe i saw a shooting star a few days ago. WTF. The only time i get to see a shooting star, I have absolutely nothing to wish for. All my hopes pretty much came true...and the wishes that I would wish, are greedy and selfish. I'd never wish for them to happen IRL; just in dreams. Yah, that was pretty awesome though...i'd have to admit.
all i need now is a thunderstorm. omfg the rain kiss. jesus christ. T_T
Now Playing: Augustana - Boston
HAHA, yeah i'm being kinda emo, but that song kinda sums up the entirety of this semester.
Maybe I'm not lovable...lol, maybe that's it. Maybe my prickly outer cactus skin has finally become a knowing hindrance. I'm just not lovable. T_T I'm infatuate-able? eh...but that's it. Guys just want to use me for whatever and that's it. Make my dinner, etc etc. ARGH.
Yeah, I know...Josh and I talked about needing change in life.
Maybe I should just do a total 180 and become 100% girl. I should just stop being interested in sports/games all together. I was born broken or something. It'll help. I won't get unwanted aggro.
I'm so tired, that this fucking blog is not making any sense to me anymore.
I'm gonna put the computer down and go to bed.
Don't worry...i'm fine. I'm just frustrated in many ways. I'll get over it someday. In the meantime, just disregard my depressing rants. I'm sorry. I'm not usually this much of a downer.
g'nite.
<3 carpe diem <3
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+1:07 PM]*
xoxo~
Now Playing: Lying is the Most Fun a Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off - Panic!
<3
Grumpy. :(
<3 carpe diem <3
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+11:53 AM]*
xoxo~
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Tuesday, November 28, 2006-)
+3:10 PM]*
xoxo~
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Monday, November 27, 2006-)
+10:34 PM]*
xoxo~
1. Greg Hilton
2. Cy
3. Tim Tsuruda
4. Chris Timm
5. Dan
6. Kevin Reilly
7. Danny J
8. Sarah
9. Kevin Huang
10. Jason M
11. Megan
12. Vince
13. Ed
14. Sataya
15. Allan
16. Vinnary
17. Devin
18. Tobiah
19. Jeremy
20. Michael Sandborn
21. Amadeus
22. Christian Lucas
<3 carpe diem <3
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+9:27 PM]*
xoxo~
1. Player in Level: Able to explore level w/ platforming abilities of analog movement: running, jumping, basic missiles, shooting.
Level Objects:
1. Platforms
2. Explodable Objects [crates]
3. Objects which are affected by Gravity [crates and player]
2. Gravity Matrix: Complete matrix system that allows complete control of gravity. It allowed for point wells, black holes, pushing, gravity waves. *(Use TechDemo)
*Disabling parts of the Gravity Matrix: Point Gravity.
What is going to be playable: Gravity that allows players to gravity flip
<3 carpe diem <3
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+6:25 PM]*
xoxo~
Okay St. Louis vs SF...
My heart was broken.
Nolan is a fucking ijit. His conservative ways FINALLY BIT HIM IN THE ASS.
What kind of a fucking call was that, SHIEEET. Fucking two centimeters away from leaving 4th down. WHAT THE HELL?! WHAT THE HELL. WHAT THE HELL.
THIS [ ] FUCKING CLOSE.
Oh and then, was the interception.
San Francisco has a great offensive line, but they have NO absolutely NO sense of a defense. ;)
rams fucking go 80+ yards in the fucking 4th, wow.
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Sunday, November 26, 2006-)
+10:35 PM]*
xoxo~
what married life is like. ;)
guess which one i am, bwahahahaa. if you get it right, award yourself 500 dkp! j/k <3 lawl
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Wednesday, November 22, 2006-)
+11:27 PM]*
xoxo~
<3 carpe diem <3
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+10:42 AM]*
xoxo~
I was like...WTF is going on w/ my keyboard? How is it typing all this weird text.
Everytime i typed something in, it always had some weird greek text instead of english. LoL...
and then i realized, HO shit, i'm using my wireless mouse + receiver....and my wireless keyboard is under all those magazines right over there, lawl. It's probably pressing a crazy button down or something XD.
Yah, i'm slow sometimes. XD
On another note...i had the most wonderful dream in the world EVAREVAREVAR last night. LOL, and it was actually a girly dream. ;) Pwahahahahahahhhh XD Yeah, shut up and DON'T ask, i'm serious. Hint: Jim, Bob, Tim and Sam. LOL
...and my credit line just expanded to 5200.00. XD WHYYYYYYYYY.....!?!?
Why couldn't it just stay at 2600!?! Damnit?!
Okay call me crazy, but I'm actually excited to shop for the holiday season. LOL, i can actually buy decorations, zomg wtf. XD <33 My house is gonna smell like holly, candy, and febreeze. LoLL...<3
I kinda have an idea what I'm getting people this year ;). <3 keeheehee
/hug
alright i'm off to the DMV, school, post office [to mail aggel's cell phone charger], then target for last minute necessities.
<3
ps. i missed dire maul last night... it was for a good reason though...XD <3
sandborn was drawing michie at game castle. LoL...yes, i was there supporting the WoW card game. <3 I need to play...i guess.
Sandborn is drawing michie and zhaa'kunn my impasaurus rex. <3 XD i have my soul harvester and my favorite purple witch hat thing...<3 she's so hawt. She glows! i can't wait till she's done! I'll be able to have a new banner! OMFGGGGGARDDDD <3
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Tuesday, November 21, 2006-)
+11:51 PM]*
xoxo~
I was watching Beauty and the Geek...and thought that it was quite entertaining.
michie <3's style="font-weight: bold;">
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Monday, November 20, 2006-)
+9:19 PM]*
xoxo~
Yeah, it never changes. I'm so glad he's such a compulsive liar.
I'm glad. It'll keep everything the way it is.
It's like one of the few things I could never be attracted to - thank god.
byahahahalol i have liar evasion! hahaha XD
<3 carpe diem <3
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+12:47 PM]*
xoxo~
Byar!
I'm here until 4 today XD zomg.
So it's lunch...and I am in desparate need to make a shopping list o' stuff so i'm doing that on my break.
Disregard this, please.
- Bundle Gifts x20 [see's, costco, ghiradelli, whatever.]
- Fun Gifts x10 [je crois que EB gift certificates etait une bonne idee]
- Family Gifts
- Dining room set
- Christmas Cards, ARGH!
- VS - STUFF
- Christmas Decor - zomg i'm so excited...it's not even funny. I can have stockings on my mantle OMFG.
- Fake tree, ZOMG, OMG.
I think that's about it for now.
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Sunday, November 19, 2006-)
+9:59 PM]*
xoxo~
LoL going through old blogs...i find gold
This was so funny [to me at least] i cried, laughing so hard. Why my own misery is funny? i have NO idea, but it's great.
Monday, January 05, 2002
GOD i just tried to take my tips off and ripped off half of my thumbnail. I FUCKING hate nails. I'd do anything to get these little fuckers off me. I've cut them down to the nub... but i cant peel the fuckers off. GRRRRRRRRRRRR it's bugging me...Especially when i type.... my nails feel so thick........ AND even though my thumb hurts like hell... it's happy that it's breathing once again. GOD DAMN vietnamese nail people. cant they use a less potent glue? damn.
posted by michie 7:47 PM
Another old post. What the hell was i on, and can i please have some more?
Monday, November 25, 2002
If you ever feel bad...just think...
1. What's the real reason why you're feeling bad? And, is it worth feeling bad over?
2. Don't use sadness or anger as an escape. (If you don't know what i mean, then dont worry about it)
3. You have control of your life, regardless if you're not 18, that your parents are controlling, you're in a relationship, you're doing things alone, people are doing it for you....etc... YOU are YOU, and nobody can tell you otherwise.
4. Who cares if Bob your second grade buddy doesn't like you. If he doesn't like you because of what someone said about you or gossip that he heard, and he'd believe that over your friendship, then he's not worth your time.
5. Don't ever believe that things are going to get better naturally. If you did something that messed something up earlier, then you're just goin to have to work your ass of to make it better. (For example, grades. If you messed up earlier...then you're gonna fix it. You cant bribe the teacher stupid ass.)
6. Do more than what you have to do. Trust me, the more work that's done earlier means you have less to do later.
7. Don't assume that you understand everything that someone's saying. If you don't get it, ASK.
8. Be thankful for what you have, because tomorrow you might not be able to.
9. God gave us life, and he gave us brains along with that life. Don't be stupid and not use it. Be grateful that you were given all that you have and be hopeful that you'll someday have more. Don't be greedy and want more, just be hopeful that you'll get more someday.
10. If there's a dude/chick that you are attracted to that shows no sign of being attracted to you back, then don't wory about it yet. They probably don't know you're alive yet, and you have to make apparent to them that you're there and you're waiting...
11. If they know you're alive but still don't give a hoots ass that you're there, then dont worry because why waste your time on someone who doesnt know what true coolness is when they see it up close.
<3 carpe diem <3
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+9:15 PM]*
xoxo~
When I was supposed to be rigging...I ended up playing BK: Sneak Game.
I have this masochistic gaming problem, where everything has to be absolutely perfect. Okay, well it doesn't have to be perfect, but I like thinking things through before I do something. Like... a C rank would never be good enough. I'd have to get A's on everything I did before settling XD, i dunno...don't ask. Or respeccing, I won't commit until everything is perfect. In this last respec, I literally mathematically figured out the most bonus fire damage w/ different talents that Michie could get. :) I can't conflag...but my soulfire w/o crit always is over 1500, 50% over 2000, and crits are high 3k low 4k...and that's JUST with BLUES. ;)
Why? Because, things like that are fun to overanalyze.
LOL
Okay get this, so I get the Wii today...and Damon gets mad at me because I didn't want to play it. I had a headache and wasn't feeling good from yesterday. I took a nap, and all of a sudden because i want to take a break from people + shit to do..."Then why the heck did you buy it anyway?" OMFG what?
DO you NOT want the Wii? Because, honestly I can easily sell it to Frank, or someone else who would actually appreciate it.
Can't I have ONE damn day to hide and be alone? Shit.
I play every fucking game he has. I ask him to play ONE game, WoW...which I'M paying for...and he doesn't want to. I don't make a fuss over it, he can do whatever the hell makes him happy... but when I don't wanna play the Wii on LAUNCH because I'm not feeling good, it's a fucking big ass goddamn deal.
Makes me wonder why I'm married sometimes. I should've stayed celibate.
Guys are the bringers of doom.
There aren't any good ones, I swear.
Josh says I'm looking for perfection. "You have a very specific set of criteria and they're pretty unusual. It's just not what most girls are looking for."
LIES! XD LoL...LIES...
During the middle of his abovementioned explaination...i had to put my hood on and get into the fetal postion. I DO have nuts, just not when they pertain to the abovementioned statement.
Haha, I'm really not that PO'd right now. I'm just angry that he can't just be satisfied with what he has so far. I'm really not that bad of a wife. I play video games with him...and watch crazy shows. I even turned girly for him this year. What else does he freaking want. LoL, yeah shut up, i know.
He wants the lovey dovey shit. Yeah, eh.
If he played WoW, i'd /hug.
LOL...no i'm half kidding. I dunno about that smothering crap. It makes me feel suffocated. He's known me for 6 almost 7 years now. If he really couldn't stand it, he should've been blunt wayy earlier in the relationship. That's not really easy to change overnight. I just hate sugar coating everything, Jesus Christ.
Everything always resorts to either bluntly saying whatever's on my mind, or holding it in if i'm worried about its consequences. It's not about having nuts or not, argh. It's about clarification.
I honestly don't fucking want a puppy that needs constant reassurance...like, "aw honey, you're such a good hubby! lets play Wii together! you're so gooood at it!"
Jesus Lord.
I'd much rather have a kitten. "Wii, meow?"
Me and my fucking analogies/metaphors.
ARGH, and the being nice part. It's SO HARD for me to just drop it and be nice. I'm so goddamn stubborn. I just wanna ignore and /guilt. I'm a fucking AP. It's my job.
LoL, i have this list of 200ish prerequisites. I made it in 10th grade. Yeah, shut up, I'm not picky...i'm just overly analytical of compatibility. LoL... Josh wants me to go through it and see what still applies.
I don't remember most of it but sadly, I think most of it still applies.
BEE ARE BEE.
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Saturday, November 18, 2006-)
+7:30 PM]*
xoxo~
"i was looking in a catalog and saw a clock that told time using binary code...and thought of you =) hope you're doing well." ~ Joanne
<3 carpe diem <3
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+2:18 PM]*
xoxo~
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Friday, November 17, 2006-)
+10:50 AM]*
xoxo~
New Build
Affliction (0 points)
None
Demonology (23 points)
2/2 Improved Healthstone
3/3 Improved Imp
3/5 Demonic Embrace
3/3 Improved Voidwalker
3/3 Improved Succubus
1/1 Fel Domination
3/3 Demonic Aegis
2/2 Master Summoner
1/1 Demonic Sacrifice
2/2 Master Conjuror
Destruction (33 points)
5/5 Improved Shadow Bolt
5/5 Cataclysm
5/5 Bane
5/5 Devastation
2/2 Destructive Reach
3/3 Improved Searing Pain
5/5 Improved Immolate
1/1 Ruin
1/5 Emberstorm
1/1 Conflagrate
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Wednesday, November 15, 2006-)
+5:05 PM]*
xoxo~
now playing: the cynic project
iono, i get in the mood for it when i have to do extensive work on the computer. ambient music is really helpful in times like that. ;)
i'm preparing for a 6 hour STRAIGHT meeting with the publisher tomorrow.
T_T i'm so fucking tired...but determined. I'm gonna rip people some new assholes.
I love my job. I think I possibly could be good at it eventually. I've been at SCG for about a month and a half already...and I've learned so much. It's the whole analogy of teenage pregnancy; Where the kid isn't ready for that much responsibility, but is forced in the position and learns fucking 10x faster.
LoL, i just had to give a Game Club presentation for a tour. lol AND THAT is why i AM a student ambassador. ;) <3
FUCKING HECK SO MUCH WORK!! OMFG i have to go to SFJP for a fucking art director shit, brb.
<3 carpe diem <3
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+10:51 AM]*
xoxo~
So the goal is...
Friday night, i'm gonna make my girls purdeee for casino night and jet out ;).
Yes, you heard right...i'm not going.
Sarah, Chelsea, Marissa, and Amy are going! :) I'm gonna get them all dolled up. LOL and once again, you heard right...Sarah and Chelsea are getting "dolled up". Hahahaa... YES...IN dresses.
I almost want to go just to see that.
There's just too much on my plate for me to let myself go. I have an intricate rig due by monday and i'm trying to be productive. It's alright though, i've been to every casino night that they've had until this one. It's not a big deal.
LoL, it kinda all snowballed because No Moo came this past weekend. I was supposed to catch up with the rig and stuff...and i had planned No Moo to come up this coming weekend; to come to casino night w/ me XD [that would've been omg so fun], but since they came last weekend...all my homework kind've went down the drain. I <3 them.
Not enough time for WoW lately... i'm sorry T_T <3
I'll try to make time tomorrow for MC. I might even cut class for ONCE this whole semester, lawl. Yes, cut class for a raid. I know, NERRRR-D. I think i sorta deserve missing one class. It's not like i've missed any yet, and whatever. I'm not even elaborating.
A little birdie told me that Gegsn's account didn't end afterall. He thought it was ending, but he had it on automatic billpay...so he has until Dec 11. Iono, i haven't been on to see the proof. Maybe i'm avoiding it, /shrug. I hope it didn't end. <3
When i found out that Gegsn's account was ending, i was in an AQ20 raid...I told fufee and he switched to Nitsue [his pally]. LOL aww. T_T it's not the same, but i do appreciate the /pat. Fufee's not holy spec'd though T_T. When i was low 50's and fufee was 60, we'd battle for who could get higher DPS. LoL...yeah he wouldn't do that NOW...but i just thought it was kind've silly that a lvl 60 would challenge a lvl 53 in dps.
It's not like i have no pallies left, kek. Fufadin, Conin, Jeffro, Cadenz, Umbringer, even Brunhinn are there. Damn, even Frank's on my server. It's just that I can't just call up any of them to raid with me. T_T OKAY, like Fufee would come anywhere to hang out...but he wouldn't bring Nitsue, he'd bring his druid...which is fine, but i'd miss the buffs. I <3 concentration aura. Well, i <3 devotion aura because it's cute...but concentration aura actually helps, lol.
It's just not the same. AND HE USES SO MUCH MANA on his druid, it's not even funny. Like, If i'm at half health and he heals me...his mana goes down 1/4th. Like, WTF are you doing that causes your mana to go down that fast? DAMN, so i hate life tapping when he has his druid.
Conin, Jeffro, Cadenz, and Brunhinn are basically all JR Pallies [except for Brunhinn...he's in No Moo, but he's Walle's alt and Walle's in JR now]...so yeah, i can borrow them...but it's they'd probably be in Naxx or some other end game raid themselves. LoL, Conin does come by and play with me a lot though...LoL, it's quite funny. I dubbed him the worst paladin, EVAR not too long ago. LoL, he was definately a Leeroy Jenkins. THEN, i went to AQ20 w/ him and he SO rocked. SOOOO GOOD. T_T i didn't know what to make of it. SOO GOOD. SOOOO GOOD.
BAH.
I play with umbringer sometimes ;). He's really nice...but was leveling up tatortot [his alt] with gegsn's alt [neils]. T_T He's not an umbringer all that much anymore.
And last but not least, frank. I don't wanna bug him to log on. He left his other server because he was sick of WoW. I'm not gonna make him sign on to play when he's avoiding the game. That, and he's having fun being social. After all that work Josh and I put in to pry him off of the computer, i'm not gonna be the one responsible for making him go back on the computer again. It would be really nice [zomg XD gahhhhh /pwn3d], but i'd rather see him hang out w/ friends and having a good time...than forced on to WoW by Michie.
So yeah. I have to move on. T_T Maybe i'll play that stupid pvp game with Sea Monkeys.
/shrug
Hmm...maybe I'll take a break from gaming. LoL...and actually have time for other things in life...like traveling or something human, lawl.
I better get to school soon. <3 I'll cya later!
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Monday, November 13, 2006-)
+7:56 PM]*
xoxo~
I'm not playing anymore.
The epic mount quest has ended.
My paladin is gone.
T_T Gegsn's account has ended. He's waiting until the expansion to renew.
pwn3d.
<3 carpe diem <3
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+1:20 PM]*
xoxo~
Eggy: "Iraq is like the eye of Mordor."
Oz: "The director of the CIA is like...Frodo going to the heart of Baghdad"
LOL.
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Saturday, November 11, 2006-)
+9:41 AM]*
xoxo~
SO a total of 6 people are here.
Mike = Aggel [the Guild Leader lol i almost typed Dungeon Master]
Sho = Gegsn [my pally :D]
Steve = Burg [our guild tank]
Tim = Tamayo [lol the pvp warrior]
Paul = Osaka [Mage/Warrior/Rogue...he has like many lvl 60s]
Nik = Niz [NON-NO MOOer. he's a night elf!]
byaaaaa <333 I love my guild.
I wish they lived up here XD
Nerf wars!! IT was HOT. :)
Burg, Aggel, and I had this huge nerf war. Tamayo and Sho were my ammo suppliers because Aggel had my revolver and i had Damon's one shot. Burg had the lock and load sniper. Hahaha...silly rabbits. We were RUNNING around the house...my body is ACTUALLY tired. haha...XD
Hope we will have time for round 2, bitches. "Bitches runnin' wild!"
POA: Lots of Locations
* SF Pier 39 - Fisherman's Wharf
* Santa Cruz Beach
Need directions...calling my daddy.
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Friday, November 10, 2006-)
+6:08 PM]*
xoxo~
Now Playing: Akon feat. Eminem - Smack That
Haha, i don't know...i go through phases. It was on the radio... :D
I'm so excited to see them. I almost wanna catch up on my puzzle fighter, lol. I AM DRINKING SO MUCH tonight. I can't wait. LoL...no really.
AB - drunk. hahaha.
they're heeeeeeeere! omg
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Thursday, November 09, 2006-)
+11:21 PM]*
xoxo~
<3 carpe diem <3
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+9:40 PM]*
xoxo~
http://ctprofiles.net/upload.ct
<3 carpe diem <3
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+9:28 PM]*
xoxo~
LOLL...
Ryan's excuse for not having things done for class was...
"I've got poison oak on my ass."
LOL...WHAT? Hahahahahahaha omfg.
Might have well said, "I AM PAUL BUNYAN'S FAGGOT BROTHER!"
wow that was mean.
<3 carpe diem <3
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+12:43 AM]*
xoxo~
Now Playing: XMen Animated Series Intro
If you get easily offended, turn away now. THIS IS A WARNING. there's MUCH venting in this post, much cursing, and much hating. And what's amazing is that I'm two weeks away from my period. This isn't even PMS, BY FAR.
I've fallen off the deep end...FLOWN the fuck off the deep end, i should say.
Gegs, bubble meee...T_T. I'm gonna get hurt.
I'm totally hating this semester like NO fucking other. It takes a gigantic amount of frustration for me to ever hate anything...and I'm definately 100% hating it.
A few days ago, I hated it 99%, but yeah it's definately 100%.
ABSOLUTELY LOATHE.
I JUST HATE IT, SO fucking MUCH.
What I'm really thinking is:
A. You all are fucking weird. Where are all the goddamn normal people? OH THAT'S RIGHT! They all go to State, where I left them... SILLY ME!
B. Which makes me wonder, why the fuck am I here? I might look normal and have a large inner nerd, but I'm too fucking normal for cogswell, in some aspects. This place just annoys me in so many ways. I've been on a fucking rollercoaster of SHIT. It's like Martha Stewart's fucking makeshift floral ride. I hope I fucking fly off and splat a bed of goddamn compost.
C. Jesus Christ, no amount of nerdy makes this lifestyle justifiable.
D. FUCK ME IN THE GOAT ASS. Miniature epiphany: My wedding was not in vain. I got married because I was sick of all the bullshit guys in the world...and there are DEFINATELY many. GRRRRRRRRARRRRRRH. I'm just tired of it.
I HATE YOU ALL. [I'll take that back in a few days...but there are definately a handful of people that I want to place on nuke island, including YOU, you fucking coldhearted asshole son of a bitch.] /sigh that felt SO good.
E. Fucking Financial aid. I don't even want to start this one.
F. FUCKING cogswell. I'm thinking of going to SJSU next semester. Yeah i have 5 classes left. mod/game 2 portfolio and GE. I don't even know if i want my game design major anymore. I'm so disillusioned. I don't even want to attend commencement.
G. Lou. Jesus Christ, someone gag and rape her. "hold on mjorn, just hold on." Yeah, i'll give you something to hold on to, you stupid son of a bitch. GARRRRRRRRRRRJESUSGODDDD.
H. OH GOD the AGGRO. It's like "There's Something About Mary" but not funny. It's like, all the most random people in the world...and the ONLY two people I'd ever consider, could give a shit less if i were alive or not. WHAT are the ODDS? WHAT are the ODDS. Okay, maybe it's not THAT extreme for both, but one most definately feels that way. The other one just lives too far for any real attatchment.
You'd laugh if I explained the situation, but i'll refrain for my own wellbeing. It's almost ironic, or unfortunately coincidental.
Conclusion:
Thanks for breaking my heart, God. It feels great. Next time you have anything bad to throw at me, I'll be ready. I think this is the worst I've felt - EVER.
You'd never see that though... :D
What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger, right?
BULLSHIT, whatever doesn't kill me makes JADED and CYNICAL.
Jeremy just made me feel like 50x better.
FUCK YOU ALL.
I need a drink and I'm going to bed.
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Tuesday, November 07, 2006-)
+9:55 PM]*
xoxo~
<3 carpe diem <3
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+5:57 PM]*
xoxo~
What I'll go for....eventually XD
Warlock Talents
Minimum Required Level: 70
Required Talent Points: 61
Demonology Talents - 25 point(s)
# Improved Healthstone - rank 2/2
# Improved Imp - rank 3/3
# Demonic Embrace - rank 5/5
# Improved Voidwalker - rank 3/3
# Improved Succubus - rank 3/3
# Fel Domination - rank 1/1
# Demonic Aegis - rank 3/3
# Master Summoner - rank 2/2
# Demonic Sacrifice - rank 1/1
# Master Conjuror - rank 2/2
Destruction Talents - 36 point(s)
# Improved Shadow Bolt - rank 5/5
# Bane - rank 5/5
# Devastation - rank 5/5
# Shadowburn - rank 1/1
# Destructive Reach - rank 2/2
# Improved Searing Pain - rank 3/3
# Improved Immolate - rank 5/5
# Ruin - rank 1/1
# Emberstorm - rank 5/5
# Backlash - rank 3/3
# Conflagrate - rank 1/1
<3 carpe diem <3
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+2:37 AM]*
xoxo~
OH yeah epic mount update...
2 parts left...
scholo to drop off an imp in a jar...
then dire maul. i need 250gold.
FUCK me IN the GOAT ass. T_T
<3 carpe diem <3
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+2:33 AM]*
xoxo~
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Monday, November 06, 2006-)
+5:58 PM]*
xoxo~
BTW, who the fuck is ossirian? And why am I being coaxed to go to him?
***XD god this is so expensive.
FREAKING heck. FREAKING, freaking heck.
I was going good...haha getting all my pieces for my epic steed...AND THEN, the arcanite bars hit. Those things are fucking expensive. NOW i have to farm just to freaking buy them at the AH. WTF. WTF. hahaha...
And no, i'm not getting help for my quests, really. Except for the 2 large brilliant shards that Aggel helped DE.
Yeah i'm stubborn, shut up. Iono, it just means more when you put the time into it, i guess.
LOL, so the funny part is that...i have a bank character named Gnomesfargo that i meant to use as a bank [but never really needed yet]...i forgot that i sent it pieces for my epic mount a while ago. So anyway i'm farming for gold for stupid elixir of shadow power, black dragonscales, large brilliant shards, etc etc... LONG behold i had 6 large brilliant shards and 20 black dragonscales already. GODDAMNIT XD i already spent all my money on them.
LoL, i COULD sell what i have, but honestly some other warlock might be able to use my pieces...haha. It just might make their day. /shrug
I'm not complaining, i'm just laughing at my retardedness. XD
DAMN.
I guess i should probably go to school, adios! <3
<3 carpe diem <3
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+8:29 AM]*
xoxo~
So tired, soo tired.
:D
I can't wait until Thursday night...No Moo's coming, again! :D
I'm so /panic in a good way.
On another note...
http://www.wowwiki.com/dreadsteed <~ i'm on the items quest. XD
case of blood??? T_T huh?
3 more large brilliant shards
25 dark iron ore
10 Elixir of Shadow Power
35 Black Dragonscale
3 Arcanite bars
I can't even mine dark iron yet ooOoOoOR THORIUM, sheesh!!!
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Saturday, November 04, 2006-)
+12:51 PM]*
xoxo~
<3 carpe diem <3
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+12:44 PM]*
xoxo~
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Thursday, November 02, 2006-)
+7:59 PM]*
xoxo~
ARGH, people are so oblivious sometimes. It just annoys me.
The next time paulette gets mistaken for me, or vice versa, i swear i'll fucking bite someone's face.
AND no, i didn't snap at her. "Because we're the same person." I would've said that sarcastic comment to ANYONE who gets us confused. Unless you're new at this school, I spare no compassion. Sorry, I'm not a Jedi.
And NO, i'm not grumpy just because of the stupid raid. I'm sad that i couldn't make it, but it's more annoying that I was arguing with Josh for a fucking hour about how we're not identical twins.
We're not identical twins. Are you fucking blind?
You know what? We are the same fucking person. Paulette and I have absolutely NO differences. SO GIVE her the fucking aggro, goddamnit. She's the single one.
STUPID aggro. I feel like I don't even have a voidwalker to take my aggro. I'm not demonology...and my fucking destruction spec is digging me into a fucking hole. It's like making everything worse. STUPID fucking HUMANS. WHAT THE HELL is wrong with them and WHY do i not fucking understand them. God DAMNIT!
Argh, I had a retarded day that Frank almost fixed within the stratholme instance. Then Josh sorta-accidentally nuked the fixed day to smitherines. Sometimes, you just need to hold back and stop stirring the fucking pot. It's not funny past a certain point, it's just annoying. I don't like arguing about reduntant crap. I'd much rather be using brain cells towards more important stuff.
I'll feel better tomorrow...but as for now, I'd rather find a fucking lighter. I'm so goddamn frustrated with the list of a million pieces of crap that I can't talk about to anyone, even my fucking blog...stupid fucking public blog crap. ARGH.
Yes, I'm going through the giraffe fucking cycle. I'm at stage 1, atm.
Fucking Cogswell. I should've went to SJSU, majored in international business, and joined a fucking sorority. It honestly would've helped.
Josh said to fix the situation:
1. Let myself go.
2. Stop playing games.
3. Cut my hair.
4. Be a grumpy bitch.
5. Wear a shit ton of make up.
6. Stop being overly friendly.
If I was at SJSU, I wouldn't have to do that. Soooo fucking angry. This being girlier crap fucking sucks shit crap feces.
It's bullshit. EVERY part of it is.
I'm so fucking tired of it. ARGH. I wish I was born as a boy.
GARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!
okay i'm getting back to class.
<3 carpe diem <3
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+10:02 AM]*
xoxo~
Aggel? Can I /ginvite two paladins? XD pweeeeeze?? They'll both be dressed up as leper gnomes <3.
nyuknyuknyuk ;D
I got to get the day off today [even though beta is tomorrow night]...because i have so much shit to finish from midterms [that i didn't do]...in order to pass my classes.
Okay plan of action today:
1. get chris timm to uv unwrap. i am waaay to crappy in uv unwrapping for a senior project level unwrap.
2. Rig it, bitches...rig it. <~hopefully the weight painting won't take THAAAaaAAaT long, but I am kinda rusty. XD
OMFG, NoMoo is visiting the second weekend of november! XD they're all staying at my house...like 7 of them. I can't wait to see my grades this semester.
I forsee: A, A, D, F.
I really should drop geometry for CG. I just don't go enough for the credit. ANNnnnd I fail all the tests anyway [lol, i don't study for them...and they're all hand written out...i don't have notes prepared.]. Classwork is cake...but whatever. It's just the principle of the situation. I barely go, and barely try. I shouldn't pass the class. I should drop it so i can relieve the stress and focus more time on the other classes.
ARGH, but i'm so fucking stubborn. I don't wanna make an impulsive decision and have to retake geometry for CG. GOD, DAMNIT.
On another sweet note, I can't believe i'm 59. zOMGWTF? It makes me all warm and fuzzy inside. Maybe I'll get to 60 quick, and play another avatar :D. /shrug, who knows? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm :D GAH i'm so excited. XD i want shyguy plagueheart gear so bad one day <3. It looks like the shyguys from the super mario series...[when it's on gnomes at least].
Yeah, fuck the stats. I really could give a shit less...considering the expansion armor sets are going to be easier to get + better. I just like the fact that I'll look like a fucking shyguy, FTWWWWWWWWWWW. :D
Okay...i'm going to escuela to grind rigging :D haha
<3
<3 carpe diem <3
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+1:34 AM]*
xoxo~
<3 carpe diem <3
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LoL the ONLY time when my shadowbolt DOESN'T suck too bad. LoL...<3 with curse of shadows...hahaha and against ossirian.
Gez Fry