You typed: blog

(Thursday, May 31, 2007-)
+9:03 AM]*

xoxo~

Time for my morning blog.

Hi y'all, today is the big day...in more ways than one. I wanna sign on WoW and eat a giblet.

It's my last day at scg - and my first official raid day [rostered and everything]w/ dinosaur. We're doing Gruul's and Magtheridon.

Haha i made smoothie eat my fortune - because it's on my bank character and you have to be lvl 65. "Not Safe for Human Consumption" LOL that was my fortune. It probably didn't quite work because smoothie ate it. >.> GAH.

NoMoo/FPD needs to hurry the fuck up so we can all play together. I'm too impatient to freaking run non-heroics anymore. It's so easy to collect badges now >.< and doing regular instances with our mains - man that's boring.

OH MY GOD, BECKY...LOOK AT HER... no, i'm just kidding. But honestly, OMFG i main tanked Durnholde on shingle. LOL AAAAAAAAAND i did okay. XD LoL i honestly used like 4 buttons though. Sheild Slam, Revenge, Sunder, Demoralizing Shout, oh...and taunt occasionally.

I love demo shout + thunderclap. That's so awesome. They love me, they really love me. OH no, i meant i generate a lot lot lot of aggro by doing almost nothing at all.

Well - it might sound like i'm leaving my old guilds - but i'm not. :) I'm just raiding gruuls and mag with dinosaur, and kara with no moo. I'd have to play an alt account this week for kara though, because i did the attunement quest for michie w/ dino.

I figure - progressing in WoW is fun to me. I have to progress to make the $15 a month worth it. I still <3 playing with my friends - i honestly do. It took me a while to understand Solfury - but he's a good guy. Sometimes when i don't know the person well enough yet, i can't tell if people are teasing - or if they're being honest. Apparently - Andy was teasing like 99.9% of the time. >.> I'm just fucking oblivious. I always thought he was pissed at me. So yeah, I've learned to take things lightheartedly - and only when people poke things out and make it apparent that i'ts serious, that i make a big deal out of it.

So i'm progressing, GOD DAMN IT. :) PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE hurry and get geared no moo/fpd!! So you can come with me too! >.< I already miss you guys and we haven't even started yet.

Osaka says i'm the new Walle! LOL >.< Not in a pvp sense, but as a zomg i know michie she's from no moo - thing. He's full of shit, btw...ahahaha. I never thought people knew who i was - i mean, I always figured they knew Maomi instead. Now i'm getting arena invites up the butt, and put on rosters i didn't even sign up for. >.< It's so weird. OMG and feral pansy is known all over now - because it's the guild i "left" for dino. Dino's like, zomg FPD's pretty geared - LOL haha yeah, bitches. :P Yeah, we are. <3

OMG DO I HAVE A PALADIN BEACON ON MY FOREHEAD OR WHAT? And since WHEN did the world know i like playing with paladins? JESUS CHRIST - Samba, DK, and Gwendalyn - now? >.>

NO WAY?

Nah - I didn't know Gwendalyn was Sneakypants from NO MOO. I didn't know BlackIvy was Bearhug, and Samba was Peppers. DangerKitty...he's shit i can't remember his main. Yeah, all these people who played as other characters who roll paladins now. It's not because of me, i promise - but still - it's really convenient. LoL OH haha and they're all human paladins, lol. What are the odds?

I should post up the yuki convo i had yesterday. NAH >.< LOL...that would be kinda embarrasing.

/sigh

Well i'm off to my last day of work. I'll cya later!

<3 carpe diem <3
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(Wednesday, May 30, 2007-)
+11:09 PM]*

xoxo~

Movies that make me cry...from laughing so hard.

What are these people thinking - really?

Yeah. WTF.

<3 carpe diem <3
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+8:56 AM]*

xoxo~

Random Note: My dream was in mostly french last night - so my languages might be a little fucked in the goat ass.

kara last night w/ dinosaur. C'était necessaire pour moi pour accomplir le "recherche d'attunement" pour ssc.

Prince était une hard, hard bitch.

I am such a noob when i'm nervous. Quand j'árrivé, i sent my felguard into two elite mobs. YEAH - i was nervous. They just teased me a bit and went on with the raid. YEAH THAT WAS RIGHT WHEN I WENT INTO KARA. >.< omg holy crap that's so bad?!! AND i was cleaving up a storm. T_T

DUDE - THEY'RE NOT LIKE ME AT ALL. Well maybe they're like me - but like, zomgwtfwhy didn't anyone tell me who LA was? >.> LOL I wouldn't have been ready for that - AT ALL. Dino is the 4th ranked guild on our server, and it's still - zomg these bitches are hardcore. LIKE - they LITERALLY USE VENT - for strategy. NO SERIOUSLY. Everyone's quiet otherwise...well for the most part.

Iono, I like raiding - i do, honestly. I dunno if I like raiding outside of NO MOO though. WELL - I like the speed of progression with Dinosaur. LOL i think it's my pace. I did a few heroics yesterday + karazhan. I could go ALL OUT and still not be top on the dps.

I can't remember the correct words, but Yuki said to be top dps...or else. So i had to screen shot it for him.

I really REALLY REALLY REALLY had to try hard OMFG like pop both trinkets + felguard + cleave + might/kings on pet + kings/salv on me and zomg shoot everything i had. It was so exhausting that i settled for 3rd dps in the end.

You have to understand that their main dps is almost fully t4 geared. >.< I'm SO JANKY comparitively. I have to like do all the tricks in the book to beat them by a hair.

Anyway, in vent they were making naxx/aq40/bwl/mc/zg references that i HAD NOOO idea wtf they were talking about.

So, typhonus typed out he had a 14g repair bill - then said that in vent all QQ-ey. Then LIKE ALL OF VENT just RIPPED HIM A NEW ONE. They were hysterrical. Like, ZOMG REMEMBER THE NAXX DAYS OF THE 46g repairs?! REMEMBER FARMING FOR REPAIR COSTS?! And they were all laughing. I don't get it >.> il est possible que cette situation était trés amusant quand une personne á perte de l'árgent. [i probably butchered that, but je ne comprend pas...rien!]

ALSO - OMG the MC boots. Ferocious, our MT - said, "Michie's the only other person who wears the guild tabard." [keep in mind our guild tabard is pink and blue] DUDE! J'ai porté les vêtements parceque, je n'avait pas l'espace dans mon inventaire pour les gris et l'essence d'âme. So someone said, "Yeah Ferocious, it's almost as manly as your pink boots." "Oh hahaha, the good old MC days."

Qu'est-ce que c'est? WTF? >.> PINK BOOTS? What the hell is going on?

I don't remember any pink boots. >.< I've only been there like 8 times or so. I think i did ZF more times than i did all the lvl 60 instances together. DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW MANY TIMES ZF bugged out on us? >.> I started heavily disliking that instance. Hmm I still think my favorite one is Scarlet Monastary though. :P Hmm...iono, i like ZF a lot too. I think i'd like ZG, but I get lost too easily there. LoL I've only been there like 4 times - and only beat it twice or so. Shingle/Gegsn/Michie got to the first boss on our own :P

I need rep there!

BTW, *REMINDER: Send DK ManaOil*

On another note, 18122/21000 Violet Eye. Less than 3 bubbles till exalted. >.< OMG?!?! I've never been exalted anywhere. It's a big deal! >.<

OH please god please god please god - drop my t4 helm. I spent 90g on that head enchant, lol. I wanna USE IT ALREADY! >.< FAK.

OMGOMGOMG

OUR HEROICS >.> Akagladiator?! WTFFFFARK? He's naxx geared up the ASS. I'm just not used to playing with these people yet. It weirds me out. LOL Akagladiator and Rhal were JR's MTs for their naxx runs. >.> We run together now. What the fark?

I would've never thought... >.> then again, I've been playing a lot lately. Not as much as Yuki plays - but definitely a lot. hahaha <3

***

So on a side note, i quit my job. My last day is 6/1. Atari is going broke thus cancelling on SCG gigs thus closing the studio. Everyone's last day is August 1st. I figure, i'd rather quit now and find a new job - instead of hang around. :)

I'm not thaaaaaat sad - i'm happy for this step in progression. Sometimes i feel like SCG is No Moo IRL. Ahahaha, LA = Lucas Arts, LOL. That WOULD be cool - but i'd really REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY wanna work for Cryptic. :P They're sooooo cool >.<.

Well im gonna get ready for wizzork. Adios.

<3 carpe diem <3
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(Tuesday, May 29, 2007-)
+8:51 AM]*

xoxo~

And back to work I go.

I think I'm quitting SCG. >.<

Our two major games got cancelled and there is officially no more money.

This month is a 1/2 paycut and next month we're not getting paid at all. I guess it doesn't really matter if I get paid or not - it's not the money that's an issue. It's going to Santa Cruz everyday that's the bummer.

Not that anywhere else wouldn't be just as much of a bummer - lol, it IS kinda nice in SCG - really it is. >.>

Hmm, I guess I could stick it out for another month - but i really don't think it's fair to work your ass off and not get paid. Maybe i'm crazy, who knows?

I'm just sad because Q.Q i really wanted to produce one of the games that got cancelled. >.< I literally called Albert Chen (my senior game design teacher) and QQ'ed on the phone, lol. "Welcome to the industry. The bigger fish will always have more power than the little fish - and eventually eat them." T_T

STOP EATING ME! >.<

I'm a helpful fish, god damn you?! I'm like one of those symbiotic whale sucking fish. SHUT UP - you know what i mean. You know? Those little fishies that keep the whales alive by sucking off the grime on whale skin, so they're not all infected and yucky? I might be getting that whole thing wrong - it's 9am in the morning and i am TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRED.

Alright, well I'm heading to work - seeing what's to come.

I ate a giblet last night - and this was my fortune. :P

I'm wearing my lucky maroon boyshorts and my "enjoy California" [it has the enjoy CocaCola style] shirt. Haha it's so cute i <3 it.

Well, we'll see who I'm meeting and what's to come <3.

I believe in my giblets <3 :)

<3 carpe diem <3
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(Monday, May 28, 2007-)
+12:52 PM]*

xoxo~

Yuki's spell dmg is so hot T_T.

I sign on for like 10 min to make my shadowcloth, and jesus christ, his mage is 1337.

...nevertheless, i have more +dmg than he does :P <3 keheheheheheheheheheheeheeee too bad it doesn't really matter - because he's so burst, that his dps makes my dps look like horse shit.

/sigh

<3 carpe diem <3
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+10:28 AM]*

xoxo~

i wanna playyyyyyyy XD lol shhh!

teh force unleashed

Okay for about half an hour, i couldve sworn that he already had an apprentice at one point.

Didnt he train someone? >.> I couldve sworn.

Then i remembered who, and when. LoL...and that it wasnt an apprentice...just training. LOL i blame this on my cousins. GROSS!?

<3 carpe diem <3
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+10:21 AM]*

xoxo~

i woke up to the clone wars preview. LoL it brightened up my day THIIIIIIIIIS much.

<3 carpe diem <3
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(Sunday, May 27, 2007-)
+7:47 PM]*

xoxo~

This blog will make you barf. Don't read it if you wanna hold your food in. It's pretty much 100% girly, i promise.

Now Playing: Snake Eater - Tanguy Ukelele Orchestra

Yeah, all this time I felt so guilty - like i was this horrible person over something i couldn't really stop/prevent. I've done my best to control it - and i'm pretty goddamn good at it.

All this time - I felt like the evil person, and in the end, i find out that all my guilt was in vain.

I don't want to date anymore T_T. For Christ's sake, that's one of the major reasons WHY i got married.

I've always been the girl that's been broken up with. I'm so sick and tired of guys that don't know what the fuck they want. GOD >.<.

I think i'm finally so afraid of rejection that I think i'd rather be alone than try searching for another fish.

It just makes me think, Well It's cuz I just suck at relationships. YOU DON'T want to be in a relationship with me, i promise.

The things that interest me are so weird and random - it'd be hard to understand and be attracted to, i guess. I'm not dating material, i promise. T_T

I talked to Josh on the phone for a bit, and spewwed everything out. He said that it wasn't my fault, and that people change. See, that's the thing T_T I'm ALWAYS going to be retarded - i'm ALWAYS going to be into the things I'm into despite pulling my occasional, "Who's Q?" shit. I think that's why I do it so much. To have people not know all that much about me - because the insides aren't that attractive, I guess. I'd rather look airheaded and ditzy than have people know that I actually monitor my combat log and average out my dps. It's not attractive to most people - and many of the people that WOULD or COULD find that attractive, are either taken, wouldn't ever be attracted to me, or the opposite: absolutely aren't my type.

I'm really not that picky, honestly. There are just a few things that everyone needs for a good stable relationship.

Okay, I lied. I'm totally picky. T_T Thus, i'd rather be alone, than date someone who's just halfway there.

"Well, I'll always be your best friend and I'll always love you. I think we used to be what eachother needed, but people change."

You could've just fucking drowned me right there. Might have well just said, "Sorry, you're just not what I want anymore."

What the heck did I do wrong? T_T I've supported everything he's ever done. I PLAY VIDEO GAMES FOR GODS SAKE. I'm in this industry too. JESUS CHRIST, I CANT be GIRLIER, i'm SORRY. T_T i'm NOT a NORMAL GIRL. I don't ever WANT TO BE. Can't you be a NORMAL GUY?! SINCE WHEN does DRAGONBALL Z EVER EVER EVER take more precedence over the fucking WORLD SERIES!? That's just fucking nuts. EVEN IF my team wasn't playing, that would still be more important than any fucking anime show - EVER. Am I wrong about that? >.< Maybe my priorities are wrong, i don't know.

Unless it was the screening of something that he's worked on, there's really nothing else that should be on the TV during that time. HONESTLY.

Maybe I was raised weird - that's probably it.

Sorry, I'm just bitter and hurt. I don't think i'd ever want to try again. I'm just not special enough. T_T I'm just another bland looking fish in the sea.

I hate seafood. Why couldn't i be a killer whale, or something with higher +sta+int.

***

On another note, I main healed Steamvaults. NO deaths & with Yuki. I had to BoP him 4 times. He likes my BoPs. <3 lol

"Why did you waste your LoH?!"

Why not? What else was I going to use it on? He almost has 300 mana per 5 - it's fine. So yeah, they want me to main heal Karazhan if Azer can't make it now. :)

I'm nowhere near how good Fin/Sho/Azer play - i mean, it's their main characters. They're really good, and I don't pretend like I know nearly as much. All i can say is that i tried not to suck in Steamvaults, and no one died. Everyone was always kept topped off, and i main healed it, bitches.

Yuki was happy - lol, well the team was happy - but yuki in particular, and his satisfaction kinda means more JUST because, he didn't make it easy on me during the whole run. He'd like - run into aggro. I COULD let him die, but i'm SOOOO goddamn stubborn that even when things look impossible, i'd rather give it my best - and NOT let him die, lol - just cuz i'm confident [almost borderline cocky] enough in Azer's stats to keep them all alive - despite the odds.

LoL, i wish i were still that confident IRL.

haha, Yeah Frank once said that if people did stupid things he'd let them die and not rez them. I respect that approach - a lot of people do that. Although I understand it, I'm totally the opposite. Like despite your stupidity/ignorance, I'm good enough to pull off saving your noob ass as well as the whole group. Then it makes me happy in the end - because the whole group is happy because we didn't have to go through a longass wipe...rezzing everyone...running back to the bodies...rebuffing, etc. I HATE waiting XD.

I'm just so bored of dpsing lately - that I'm finding healing fun.

OH SHIT! So I saw Amy [game club amy] at "Play: A Video Game Musical" yesterday. Anyway, she was with a bunch of her friends, lol /poked me and said, "zomg! I caved! I play an undead warlock XD on Kevin's server!!"

>.> Good for you? What the hell am I supposed to say? WHOO HOO? HURRAY? JOIN THE CROWD? You should play an undead warlock on my server. >:D It'd be fun.

I'm done elaborating.

I am a holy warlock sometimes - despite feeling the need to heal people, i wish i could crit smite people for like 6k. YES, A HOLY SMITE FOR 6K. I'd fuck bitches up. Then, i'd summon up a paladin to HoJ and holy shock them. GOD if i had an instant holy shock as a holy warlock, omfuuuuuuuuugggggod, i'd shit a brick.

Alright - i gotta get back to laundry + cooking.

Phewwwwwwww...that was a heartfelt blog - i <3 you blogger.

<3 carpe diem <3
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+11:20 AM]*

xoxo~

Josh and I have a color wheel. There are colors he says every once in a while with attributes that I need to work on.

So far, it's been green. And no, Green /= envy or horny.

:)

WHY AM I MAIN HEALING SHADOW LABS >.<.

<3 carpe diem <3
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(Friday, May 25, 2007-)
+9:10 PM]*

xoxo~

affliction spec stats. it makes me cry. that's FULLY BUFFED, too.

reminder. dinosaurs go rawrrrrrrrr!

<3 carpe diem <3
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+11:04 AM]*

xoxo~

OH it makes me so happy, it's not even funny. LOL

Well that wasn't a boss fight...just trash. I'd unfortunately top dps at bosses T_T. Iono, it makes me happy that Gemminie passes up my dps. He should be WAY above Chy's dps as a demonology spec. Much of his dps relies on quick damage vs. sustained DoTs.

My current spec is endgame raid oriented >.< so it's major dps over time - mana efficiency bullshit.

LOL, it's like the anti-michie. Like, everything I don't like doing when playing a warlock - basically pressing five buttons once, then it dying. It gets so fucking boring. There's no room to really use your curses wisely anymore - because im not a support warlock anymore. I'm just there for dps. It's so lame. SO LAME.

I have a new weapon :( and it kinda makes me sad lol cuz i worked really hard for that offhand - and it's basically useless until i get a better mainhand.

FINE I'LL ENCHANT IT. It's so fucking expensive though >.<.

GOD i'm at 372 >.< i just need 3 more fucking points to make my shadoweave robe...and i'll be DONEEEEEEEEEEE OMFG.

<3 carpe diem <3
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(Thursday, May 24, 2007-)
+12:02 PM]*

xoxo~

How can you have like +800 healing with 60 gear?! That's just nuts.

Do you even KNOW how many /tells i got today? In SW?! "zomg you have the full set!?"

And my response, "ya"

No fair :P i want t2 <3

LOL

Now what am i doing on Azer? I forgot.

<3 carpe diem <3
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(Wednesday, May 23, 2007-)
+8:36 PM]*

xoxo~

My friend from HS just came and visited me.

"Can i see your grad pictures?"

...!

i am NOT a jealous girlfriend. Joshua you asshole, i AM NOT. Stop stirring that goddamn pot of yours. One day it'll overflow and you'll be sorry.

***

[20:40] HyperFluffyBunny: well itd be cool if you played a pally too
[20:40] HyperFluffyBunny: make a paladin army
[20:40] HyperFluffyBunny: i bet you could out pally nira
[20:40] hellokuty16: LOL
[20:40] hellokuty16: i can try on Azer
[20:40] hellokuty16: i'll even wear gimper gear
[20:41] HyperFluffyBunny: zomg
[20:41] HyperFluffyBunny: i always wanted to make an all undead guild called zerglings
[20:41] HyperFluffyBunny: [Zerglings]
[20:41] hellokuty16: hahaha <3
[20:42] hellokuty16: i wanna make an all paladin guild named [Protoss] and everyone had to have t1
[20:42] HyperFluffyBunny: omg
[20:42] hellokuty16: hahaha
[20:42] HyperFluffyBunny: or an all hunter guild called [Terran Marines]

<3

<3 carpe diem <3
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(Tuesday, May 22, 2007-)
+11:50 PM]*

xoxo~

I already don't like this class. I died 6 times already in heroic sethekk.

I hate relying on people. Most of them fail.

It just sucks. I don't like blaming people when I die...so i blame it on my threat. Then i get frustrated that i generate so much goddamn threat.

Died 7 times. I'd FUCKING REPAIR, but i CANT. I made my boots, lvled up to 366 anddddddd, respecced. i have like fucking 20g now. It's wonderful.

LoL, this is what i get for being lazy and not questing.

Well no, i can i do have spare funds, but i'd rather not use those. Osaka needs them more than i do. he's trying to get 4 characters geared. I quested shingle for a long time - and have funds on her. Osakas trying to get his 4 chars to 70 w/ flying mounts for each. :P He's gonna need the funds first.

I really don't give a shit that i'm not getting the epic birdy anytime soon.

***

Edit #2 at 11am:

OH man, i talked to shoji until 4:30am >.< about everything.

He wants me to level up Miichiie, lol. :D

I talked to him about paladins - how they're destruction warlocks, and he /laughed. He said - not quite, because we have pets. Then i explained to him that he has auras...and they're the same thing. LoL fire sheild is retribution aura, demon armor is devotion aura, felarmor is concentration aura, having your felguard out is fire/frost/nature/shadow resist aura, what am i missing? OH YEAH! Paranoia is perception...and ummm our voidwalkers can bubble us.

Narf. :P I kinda do want to level up my paladin, i guess.

At least i won't have to dps anymore. Riki was smart. He made a warrior+priest duo. I need to make a Warlock+Paladin duo. That would be nuts. Shoji has rogue/warrior alts, but it doesn't seem to match him well.

I just hate dying. OKAY with my update - i made about 100ish gold in the few hours i played yesterday from questing. Cool huh? Except for the fact that my repair costs for the whole day was about 46g [two full repairs] not to mention my respec. LOL Yeah, it takes a lot of work to play a endgame leveled avatar. If i'm not going to be raiding, i dunno if i want to try to keep her up. She has 11/17 epics.

***

OHGOD SORRY >.< i keep getting distracted...update @ 4pmish

Sorry, liliana just called and smacked me back into reality.

"CHRISTINEE!!!!! GRAD PHOTOS!?! WTF are you doing wasting your time on a stupid game!? Well it IS your hobby, i know...but you should be cleaning your room - LIVING LIFE. Btw who's that guy in picture 2, he's really cute."

She's like my mom, if not worse. Hahaha :P

OH yeah, and about "that guy", touch him and i'll bite your face off/rip you a new one/slaughter your family. >:D lol

I'm just kiiiiiiiiidding....bwahaha, well halfway kidding. :P

Unless you can set him up with someone special, i hold a super high standard of eligible candidates, i guess. Why do I even care? Hah, because if ________his_______ then he'd ___________someone that would_____________. It would just _________ my _______ a little bit less.

LOL I guess i do function in if then statements. I block out the words not because i'm a pansy bitch, but because i can't say them. Because honestly, despite being the normally scared little animal that i usually am, i honestly don't feel afraid to tell him stuff like that. Even if he didn't/did feel the same, it wouldn't make a difference.

OH MAN sometimes i wish i could, you have no idea. I just cant T_T.

<3 carpe diem <3
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+8:50 AM]*

xoxo~

Yeah I'm officially ignoring Snazzy and Strajak wants to "talk".

Apparently he's concerned with the way I "word" things. I said one phrase, and Snazzy felt i completely said it wrong. I said, "I didn't think stating the obvious was talking shit." That apparenly was the biggest taboo ever.

Anyway, I put him on ignore. :) I don't even want to get into that shit. I'm making Snazzy's guildmates sad: Strajak and Gemminie.

I'm making them sad? THEY'RE making themselves sad by waiting around for gear. They need to stop expecting people to spoonfeed them fucking gear and do some shit on their own. I help the fucking WORLD get geared and mounts! It's not even FUNNY! DO YOU KNOW how many people helped ME get geared? MY HANDFUL! MY FUCKING MOO PANSIERS! IF not them, I did it ON MY OWN. That's why i HELP them, because they'll help me if i ever needed it. DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW MUCH GOLD I COULD'VE HAD IF I DIDN'T?

I'm tired of being walked all over. I always get taken advantage of - and i'm fucking sick of it. You can go fuck yourselves. :) I don't have to be nice to you - i don't even goddamn know you. You have no idea what the fuck is going on, so i suggest if you don't know all the facts, to shut the fucking gaping hole in your head before it gets filled with something explosive. [lol, reading back on this blog entry...after i finished writing...lol this statement was filled with so much sarcasm and rude assholeyness that it made me laugh...A LOT.]

I HATE it when people fucking hate on me when i'm doing well. It's SUCH BS. When i was <60 everyone was so fucking nice. As soon as i hit top of the dps -> artifice and more they're all up on my ass like a fucking crab infestation. It's so fucking annoying. WORK HARD and you'll get there too, you fucking lazy kids. GOD DAMNIT.

My Dad once told me, "People like to see people fail, it's just human nature."

Well fuck, maybe im inhuman then. I hate seeing people fail. I HATE it. I'd rather see myself fail for the rest of the group. It's such a WASTE.

I'll be the bait for the rogues if that means that the rest of our team can take down the opposing team while they're distracted gangraping me. It doesn't matter if i die, because we still win in the end.

NOW, LAST NIGHT...sorry if i was snappy, but you WOULD be too if you NEVER GOT REZZED. LoL, yeah Frank can be quite a dick sometimes. I usually just brush it off but the first handful of times we died last night, he didn't rez me. I wouldn't have cared if it were anywhere else, really...it's just that coilfang's graveyard is fucking far away and it's such a goddamn waste of time to run back each time. Yeah, made me wonder why do i even bother soulstoning him - it's such a waste of a soulshard. If he's going to make me run back, i should make him run back too. Then i think, well i don't want the rest of my group to have to run back - fucking shit FINE, i'll run back.

THEN, whatever the case was, he decided to start rezzing me. Unfortunately for some reason, i couldn't get the rezzes - so i didn't even know he was trying. He said in /p chat, "i only don't rez people who do something stupid and wipe the group." or something to that extent. DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I INTERCEPTED SHIT THAT WAS ON HIM? I was SO FUCKING PISSED, i could've fucking left him to die. "Michie what are you doing? Kill Nipple!", "I couldn't, Moon was on Azer."

Anyway, i found out that my WoW was just buggy and didn't give me the rez-message no matter who did it - even shunfu, fufie, and the graveyard didn't even give me the option.

Nonetheless, I had to restart WoW.

SO... SORRY, I GUESS. You can't blame me for being pissed though. I didn't know, and it's not like you were saying anything to indicate that you were trying to rez me. All i had to base your actions on were the 5 MILLION times i've died and you haven't rezzed me before. Like you rezzed everyone - and i released thinking you weren't going to rez me - THEN you said that statement.

I felt really guilty for yelling at you after, if that makes it any better.

We really [err one of us at least] need/s to let No Moo know that we act like that to each other. They might start intervening if they think you're being too mean - or if i'm being too mean. I just don't wanna worry them any. They're quiet game nerd people. <3

It just pissed me off and made me rethink about wanting to respec. I don't want to have a higher amount of dps if it means that i'm going to need to rely on healers more. I wouldn't have soul link and my dps overall would be higher. I'd have an easier time pulling and if i cant rely on my healer to take care of me, lol then i'd rather not respec. Gegsn was pretty much the only paladin that pushed me to go for it; that shooting for the stars wasn't an impossibility. Hm, i literally have to cater my class for the people we go with. Everyone who i've grouped with so far needed a support lock - where they output a good amount of dps, but they're on their own - don't need heals, wipe protection, and give out "911 oh shit healing candy".

I haven't proved I can use kings? Pft, lol. I wouldn't hold a stack of fucking symbol of kings for the paladins in our party if i didn't use kings - at least on my pet. Salv makes me so bored. At least with kings, i have to monitor something. LOL Frank said in the car a few days ago, "you should just have your imp out for the reduced threat...and then you can go all out. you should be able to do more dps that way." See, well that's why you're a paladin and i'm a warlock.

I CAN'T DO A LOT OF DPS sometimes. If i shadowbolted everything to hell how easy am i making it for the tank. It doesn't even matter if i have threat reduction. Also, if i had my imp out, if i pull aggro - which i most likely wouldn't, but just SAY if the boss fears...and the MT got feared away - and i got the full aggro, If i didn't have soul link, i wouldn't be able to tank it for a bit while the group regroups. MY imp would die in a hit - it only has like 2k hp.

Yeah, it's like having double salv. It makes me SO BORED. Literally - i just shift+5, shift+4, shift+3, trinket, 2, 2, 2, soulshatter, shift+5, shift+4, shift+3, trinket, 2, 2, 2. When normally, it's all of the above but like...twice as much dps outputted so i usually use my soulshatter later...like...around the 2nd trinket when the boss LOOKS at me. LoL...yeah when i FIRST pull aggro, i soulshatter. Yuki says to do it 1/4 of the bossfight - but honestly i usually save it for 2/3...or like 3/4 or so...only because it's such a waste if i use it early. I can catch up by mid-fight and i'm screwed because i can't soulshatter again.

For example, just say that 1/4th the fight the MT's threat is at about 14k, and i'm at about 12-13k. 1/2way he's about 28k and i'm at 26k. 3/4 of the bossfight he's at like 42k...nah lets just say 50kish. Once the MT hits about 48k, i usually go ALLLLLLL OUT and hit about 60k when the mt's at 50k. Then, as SOON as the boss looks at me, i pop a soulshatter and drop down to 30k automatically. The boss then flipps around back to the MT, and i can feel free to zomgwtfbbqpwn go all out trinkets up the ass on dps after that without having the worry of catching up.

That's WITH KINGS. It's just a lot more fun...than sustained dps throughout the fight. It's not as efficient, but it's more on the line - and more exciting. It's not inefficient also...it's just not as efficient as an affliction/dest spec lock with a shit ton of threat reduction.

Yuki frowns at me, LoL...he says it's not safe. I can't always rely on numbers + soulshatter...and that sustained dps throughout the fight is much more reliable. Yeah, so? It's boring as shit. When I need to respec and/or play a certain way for a raid, i'll definitely take it into consideration and change my playstyle to benefit the majority of the group...but when it's an instance that i've done before - i'm going to enjoy playing a lock differently. It's not effecting you any. I still kill the shit just as fast - if not faster. I'm not asking you to heal me, or to taunt for me. I'm not asking anyone to play any differently. I've played a lock for 70 levels - and a lot in BC. Just have some faith, will ya? Jesus

SALV. YUCK.

LOL I like devotion aura and kings. Haha...It just means i'm ready to pull, that's all. I can 13k my health in 2 seconds and lifedrain tank bitches, you have NO idea.

I wish i had a ss of flaroon the other day. I had 13khp w/ commanding shout, and flaroon had 10khp. He takes 20% of my damage. I have all his hitpoints until he dies - and i can insta-summon another one. It's like having 23khp - he's part of my +dmg, part of my resistances, and part of my armor/hp.

Now, it should all make sense why I like playing with a paladin. They're like a healing felguard. They have blessing of sacrifice - not that they use it that much...but in pvp when i play with Gegsn, and rogues are gang banging me, he blessing of sacrifices...and i have soul-link. I NEVER DIE! It's soullinkX2 zomgggg! Also, it keeps him from being CC'd - so it works out for both of us. I can soul link with a paladin, LOL that makes me /giggle.

KEHEHEHEHEHehheheheheee.

SO yeah, here's the update.

Self buffed, bitches. Michie's getting geared. <3 W/O KINGS+ADEPTS+WIZARDOIL+ETC.

Fel Armor, Pet, and Trinket. That's it.

k im gonna go, adios.

<3 carpe diem <3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Monday, May 21, 2007-)
+12:14 PM]*

xoxo~

Josh, you take the funniest pictures - EVER...

[ohgodthesepicturesarehuge]

WHY CANT I BE MORE TAN!!!! OMG! >.< lol...

okay adios.

<3 carpe diem <3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

+10:19 AM]*

xoxo~

HOLY i woke up siiiiiiiick. LoL

I didn't get that drunk last night, i promise. I just was reckless and ate/drank a bunch of stuff i shouldn't have...and it hit me today.

Not to mention im a tad hungover.

On another note, i haven't posted up a reel of screenshots in a bit - progress and whatnot, so i'll do it right now.

***

If i had to "WoW Car" Shoji, i know he'd always pick humans first - terran, or whatever but honestly, i'd say he was more blood elf than anything. He IS lawful good, but there's something about BE's that match him.

Riiight??

We went to Arcatraz, and took down the last boss with just us two surviving. :P we are teh dynamic duo. LoL

Fufee has a big sword too :D

Anyway we attempted LOL Heroic Arcatraz [OMIGARDS...] and i think shunfu and i are the only ones that can resist as much as we can - so far. We can resist a lot, and it STILL HURTS, JESUS.

Michie's kara starting stats last week. I hate having 22crit. Yeah you all snicker like, "how could you hate having crit?! that's BS!" It's cuz in PvE, i put up dots on elites, and that ticks for a good amount of damage. THEN, all of a sudden - if i shadowbolt and it happens to crit for almost 5k, my threat goes nuts. It's just one more thing to monitor. I can do it - and in pvp it's great, but it's just an added nuisance. I'd rather have +1500 shadow dmg and 10% crit.

We had a new Kara group, btw...It was pretty hawt - other than the fact that we had 4 paladins, lol. :) I mean, that was hot don't get me wrong...i love having 4 blessings on me. LOL, it's like christmas and my gifts are auras + blessings <3. hahaha

Yeah, yeah...just because you had top heals, DOESN'T mean you don't need better gear. It just means you play well despite the gear. Badmama is REALLY GOOD. REALLY REALLY GOOD - and he has good gear. We need to get you Badmamas gear, because you'd be so uber hawt, it's sick.

Speaking of new gear...I got a new helm...twice.

Too bad I can't wear it. It's pretty hawt. It's WAAAAAAAY better than what i had. The 2nd hat I got...almost made me pee. I was so happy.

Just to prove a point. Fufer's lvl 34 i think.

Okay also I probably posted this earlier, but fucking shit i need t4 already.

It brightens up my day. HOW DO YOU DPS SO SHITTY!? You're in t4 GEAR! WTF?!

On another note, im a priest - im a priest!

Awwwwwwwww<3

Michie's not too cute to be a warlock at ALL :P she can:

and

***

I need to get motivated again, :P

Maybe I'll respec. Strajak did it - i should too. I like playing demonology but being a support warlock is not always the best solution for PvE. It's so weird because my spec is like the LEAST amount of outputting dps spec ever - believe it or not. So when going up against Warlocks' dps -> he's full affliction->ruin, it makes my heart glitter. I'm a support lock. That's it. I intercept and tank if needed. My healthstones are purposeful - and i'm self sufficient. If i ever switched to affliction, i'd be SO FUCKING SQUISHY it's not even funny. I couldn't live forever on my own - and my dps would zomgfuckingpwn [well hypothetically].

I hate being on the top of the dps charts. It was an accomplishment at first - and totally made me happy before. Like, OMG all the hard work is paying off...but now, it's like, yay - yet another day of grinding Kara and no one else is taking the effort to out dps me. SO i don't even try.

Granted, some of the bosses I can't do much about - really. But for example, curator...i COULD'VE curse of doomed at the correct percentage, but i figured i'd give gemminie the chance to catch up - and he didn't do it at the right percentage either. If i do it at the right percentage each time, it's 28.9k ish damage after a minute. It auto launches me to the top and if i do that 4 times, it's not even fair.

Yeah, i'm starting to play WoW like i play tetris and it's getting boring. So i think i need to respec and start sucking all over again. At least then i can get good at that, or feel motivated to get better at it, you know?

A challenge would be speccing destruction and pve-ing in dest spec. :P LoLoL, do you know how hard that shit is? LOL I guess the reason why it wasn't so hard switching from main dps to main healing [when playing azer], was because i lvled 1-60 in full destruction spec. Destruction is like the complete opposite of Holy. LOL what made it even weirder, is that i was like 0/16/44 or almost that. Which is like the complete opposite of Gegsn's spec. LoL Don't ask why it's 0/16/44. I was a nubcake, and wanted my numbers.

In destruction, i used shadowbolts + searing pain a LOT...as well as instant cast curse of agony + other debuffs: CoT/CoS/CoW/CoE depending on the situation. Okay, it's the saaaaame shit other than the fact that you're now instead of "tabbing" an enemy [or clicking on them] and debuffing a mob, then Shadowbolting/Searing pain-ing...you're "ctrltabbing" a member [or clicking on them]and fucking buffing them, holylight/flash of lighting them. HuuuuWOW.

Frank said, "i don't see you as much of a healer." LoL, well...squaresoft gamers do everything. You can't just be good at dpsing to be good at any turn based rpg. You play everything - and have to be decently proficient in all of it to be succesful fighting bosses. Frank's played Azer a whole shit ton, and i don't argue that his healing skills are zomg 1337er than mine. But even then, if i had to main heal an instance though, i'd trust my own healing skills over a pug for the most part, and/or a few other healers.

LOL DUDE, DUDE. In December, i ninja'ed Azer [i can't remember why] and i org wsg/ab/av'ed with him. Wtf was that for? OH! I was helping him get his kitty mount. Anyway, I was top of heals the whole time -> as well higher dps than half of the team & capping shit too. OH you have NO idea. OH I CAN MAIN HEAL, lol <3.

It's a different mindset - but in the end it's all the same. I can't take damage very well, and they can't dps very well. We couldn't get anywhere fast without eachother. The end.

Okay so i'm gonna play some pokemon and lie down because i feel horrible, lol...adios.

T

<3 carpe diem <3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Sunday, May 20, 2007-)
+8:58 AM]*

xoxo~

We watched the Decent last night. DUDE - that was not a 10 on the scary meter. NOT EVEN CLOSE.

The climax whas when they showed the things face. That, i admit was pretty goddamn scary. I screamed like a little girl. The pain the girl w/ the broken leg had...and the fear that the girl who got stuck in the tight area - were also scary. That literally made me feel weak, lol. Yeah, i can be a pansy too.

I dunno, they shouldn't have shown the things face so early - and they shouldn't have been so hard to kill, i guess. After a while, it started to be a joke, like hurry up and kill it already. Like - later on there was a room with a pool of blood + a woman crawler thing. It was so cliché to Carrie, that i didn't even look away. ALSO - the woman crawler thing had tits - large ones at that. I couldn't take it so seriously that whole fight.

They were so easy to kill - why be scared of them. Then the rest of the movie, you were too busy cheering on the girls to be too scared.

I tend to freak myself out a lot. Like...i brace myself for what i think is to come - and scare myself before it even happens.

That movie was not a 10 on the scariness scale, to me at least...

What's funny - is that...from 7th grade->10th grade, after Japanese school every saturday, i had this habit of renting horror movies, watching them, then being scared for a little while after but overall getting over it fairly quickly.

I don't like watching scary movies with people. Because...they usually freak me out more than I do. LoL

Anyway, i had this crush [i probably still do, who knows /shrug] on the whole romeo and juliet thing. So many of the books/movies i read/watched, were loosely based on that. Interview with the vampire was one of my favorite movies for a while then it's sequel -> Queen of the Damned. There was just something about falling in love with someone you absolutely could not be with that totally made me turn into a ball of mush. Especially if it was obvious -> like...She's going to get old and die...when you'll live forever. He's a Jedi, he can't fall in love. They can't be together because she absorbs other peoples powers until they die. I'm like, zomigards but they <3 eachother OMFGOMFG. T_T /slay

So yeah - what was my point? OH. Yeah those movies don't scare me so much anymore, i guess. If it's just a horror movie, I overanalyze it too much and find continuity breaks and question too much of the movie to really enjoy it. I just get startled by the, "Boo" stuff...but overall, it's not the stuff that gives me nightmares.

NOoooooooow...stuff that gives me nightmares. It's gonna sound really childish, but unsolved mysteries scares the living shit out of me. There were a few times that i had to sleep with the light on and/or cried after watching it. Haha, and what's dumb...is that i BOUGHT the unsolved mysteries "ghosts and paranormal activity" set just to see if i'd still be scared of it. Guess what, it still freaks me the fuck out. I literally CRY like a pansy bitch. And it's not like...the "Boo!" "AHHH!" kind of scary that you get over in 5 seconds, no it's FEAR. LOL, i'm not even kidding. It's the, i can't look away even if the tv scares me, oh god they showed it, it's looking at me, fucking god this sucks - and i start crying. Then i see that face for a good week or so and i scare myself. T_T I HATE it.

What's STUPID is that i'm so curious that it's annoying. I just wanna know if i'm over it so i'll watch it again...and re-freak myself out all over again. I hold this standard of stuff to be afraid of - and that is one of the major things. ALSO...anything Catholic related freaks me out. Like, my cousins used to watch the x-files, and there were a few episodes with exorcisims and possesions. That freaks me the fuck out. The exorcist wasn't scary - i think it's because of how old the film was and the believability of the FX. There are others though, that really freak me out. Like...stigmata, omfg omfg. >.< Aaaaaaand....i dunno, anything unsolved mysteries that involves paranormal possesions and the catholic church. That just freaks me out.

It's probably because in the back of my mind - despite knowing that it's probably just an old wives' tale or not real...i can't help but think that omfg, this can happen IRL.

My mom for some reason, doesn't believe in any of that stuff and doesn't like the vampire stuff and demons. She's not scared of any of it though. It's weird. I'd think that she would be scared of the posession crap, but she just thinks it's a bunch of horse shit. "They must've done something to deserve it." ish attitude. LOL? MOM?

She's not even scared of ghosts/scary faces. DUDE...that's like my kryptonite. A scary face is horrible at first. Well, certain scary faces... like monsters and/or aliens aren't so bad -> ghosts/real people possesed/real people scare the SHIT out of me.

There was an episode of House, where this woman had a stroke...and when she was having it, her face was contorting to something special, lol...because of it. Everytime i think of it, it freaks me out. She wasn't even possesed or anything of the sort, but it scares the shit out of me. I guess it's because it happens IRL a lot and i dunno, stuff that happens irl scares me 95% more than a well developed storyline.

/end rant.

***

On another note, there's this dest. 70 lock that posted up his uber 1337 dps on gvideo. For some reason, i'm not thaaaaaat impressed.

I DO miss destruction, a LOT LOT LOT...but i think i'm so suited to play demonology, its sick. It's like the most annoying parts of being a warlock - ever.

dps lock

It's ALRIGHT, yeah some of his crits are large - 4kish. Honestly, my immolate crit at 60 was 2k. My conflagrate was another 1.5->2k after that. He's 10 levels higher...if that's the only output of dps he has, then first of all it's not mana efficient at all, secondly one of my shadowbolts does 4k a crit. He'd have to immolate -> incinerate to do the same amount of damage. I dunno, it didn't impress me, that's all.

Now if he was a ret paladin and did a 4k crit, i'd /lick. Either that or if he was a warlock...with great gear t5ish and did a 10k shadowbolt or something nucking futs, i'd /lick also. DUDE, if i can have a 6k shadowbolt crit, there should be someone out there that can post a 10k shadowbolt crit, w/o fighting curator.

OMFG i had a 28.9k curse of doom crit on curator. WHAT THE FUCK!? THAT IS SO NUTS it HURTS. 28.9k, WHAAAAAAAAAT?!

k i'm going to WoW, adios!

<3 carpe diem <3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Wednesday, May 16, 2007-)
+1:34 PM]*

xoxo~

I've been saying the word NOOB too much lately. LOL, i need to stop.

haha, its as if i'm not as much of a nublet too. LOL I'M SO NOOB ITS GROSS.

<3 carpe diem <3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

+11:58 AM]*

xoxo~

LOL >.>

GUYS ARE SUCH DORKS, sometimes. It's amazing.

I'm not explaining the 15,000 conversations i had from this morning up until now...but lets just say - most of them can be so oblivious sometimes, it boggles my mind.

Iiiiiii can turn off feelings like no other. Like objectify shit...and turn it off like it never existed. I'm back to my old - ummmmm self. It's just funny that they all can't do that also.

I mean, honestly...I do feel stuff inside [lol really, i do - despite my semi robotic nature], but i figure thats for me to deal with and not the world to witness. Soooo, i turn it off...and act differently on the outside. In real life - I get hurt, worry, care, wonder, and aaaaaaallllll that other human shit. It's just not helpful [IRL - everyday] enough for me to keep it around.

Hahahha i was talking to jeremy about the progress of gameclub/graviton w/e else...and it's so funny, it makes me /giggle.

[12:15] Jeremy Welch: the way I approach life and the lessons I aim to learn is like a triangle or a pyramid
[12:16] Jeremy Welch: at the bottom of the pyramid are proactivity, clear goals, and proper priorities when I can achieve these I have a private victory going up the pyramid are solving problems with win/win solutions, hearing the other person's side first, and creating teams where the energy of 1+1=3 when I'm able to achieve that I have a public victory
[12:20] Jeremy Welch: by the time I am dealing with others I have already taken care of myself
[12:21] Jeremy Welch: Tobiah's ambition will be his downfall because he doesn't properly show respect or caring for other people
[12:22] Jeremy Welch: these things, as you know, are 90% due to his age
[12:23] Jeremy Welch: a lot comes from the way we grow up playing games and the inherent lessons subconsciously learned there
[12:26] Jeremy Welch: since I know this it shouldn't offend me. But I can't turn off my emotions, moreover, I won't. It's a risk, yeah, but the reward is one I'm not willing to give up on.
[13:17] cpcprincess: just keep in mind, you don't have to turn off your emotions
[13:18] cpcprincess: just hide them from public view
[13:18] cpcprincess: becaues people will exploit them
[13:20] cpcprincess: and take advantage of you
[13:20] cpcprincess: i never turn off my emotions
[13:20] cpcprincess: :P
[13:20] cpcprincess: you've seen them that was when i was stupid
[13:20] cpcprincess: and couldn't hide them as well
[13:20] cpcprincess: i still care
[13:21] cpcprincess: but it's not just about caring anymore
[13:21] cpcprincess: it's about caring enough to hide them
[13:21] cpcprincess: for the sake of whomever you're working with and/or the group/majority

LOL I feel like i just leveled up IRL, and it feels great.

I'll always care, haha. I just care enough to act like I don't. People who i work with and/or who know me well enough should understand that.

Why do i feel like i just said a hypocrytical statement yet i don't know why. I swear it's going to hit me later and i'll once again get slapped by the total NOOB stick, haha.

<3 carpe diem <3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Monday, May 14, 2007-)
+5:41 PM]*

xoxo~

[17:26] strwbryflvrmochi: remind me to give you a prom pic mmk?
[17:26] hellokuty16: k :)
[17:27] strwbryflvrmochi: did i tell you that i went with stephan?
[17:27] hellokuty16: OMFG DID YOU? LOL
[17:27] strwbryflvrmochi: yah
[17:27] hellokuty16: are you guys together?
[17:27] strwbryflvrmochi: i was like "stephan, go to prom with me"
[17:27] strwbryflvrmochi: no
[17:27] hellokuty16: you guys are so cute :P
[17:28] strwbryflvrmochi: =X
[17:28] strwbryflvrmochi: i think you're like the 5th person to say that
[17:28] strwbryflvrmochi: i don't think he likes me
[17:29] hellokuty16: /rolls eyes LOL
[17:30] strwbryflvrmochi: o.O'
[17:31] strwbryflvrmochi: he hasn't said anything along the lines of him liking me
[17:31] hellokuty16: guys don't say stuff
[17:31] hellokuty16: they're retarded
[17:31] strwbryflvrmochi: last time i heard, he asked some other girl out in april
[17:31] hellokuty16: you can just tell
[17:31] hellokuty16: /rolls eyes lol
[17:31] strwbryflvrmochi: i thought he did
[17:31] strwbryflvrmochi: until he was like "oh i might be getting a gf so we can't hang out that much anymore"
[17:31] strwbryflvrmochi: like out of the blue
[17:31] hellokuty16: well maybe he was getting a gf
[17:31] hellokuty16: because he didn't think you liked him
[17:31] hellokuty16: and didn't think he had a chance...T_T
[17:31] strwbryflvrmochi: he got turned down
[17:32] hellokuty16: you should talk to him about it
[17:32] hellokuty16: i bet you he probably likes you
[17:32] hellokuty16: he's just respecting the "bestfriend" tag
[17:33] strwbryflvrmochi: i asked him straight out before who he liked
[17:33] strwbryflvrmochi: i think the friday before my spring break
[17:33] strwbryflvrmochi: i asked if he liked me
[17:33] strwbryflvrmochi: he said no both times :*(
[17:33] strwbryflvrmochi: and then i asked him to prom
[17:33] strwbryflvrmochi: and...yeah
[17:34] hellokuty16: LOLDUUUDE
[17:34] hellokuty16: guys are scared scared individuals
[17:34] hellokuty16: most of them
[17:34] hellokuty16: well at least the kinds that we're friends with
[17:35] hellokuty16: if you just confront him and say, "HEY, who do you like?"
[17:35] hellokuty16: lol he's not going to freaking tell you
[17:35] hellokuty16: he's gonna dodge it as much as he can
[17:35] strwbryflvrmochi: he doesn't tell me anything!
[17:35] hellokuty16: lol yup that's just how it is
[17:35] strwbryflvrmochi: he dodges stuff like his life depends on it
[17:35] hellokuty16: yup
[17:35] hellokuty16: they're just like that
[17:36] hellokuty16: you shouldn't worry about it much
[17:36] hellokuty16: do you like him back?
[17:36] strwbryflvrmochi: i'm more worried about finding his ticklish spot
[17:36] strwbryflvrmochi: so i can get back at him
[17:36] hellokuty16: >.> oh god
[17:36] hellokuty16: lol
[17:37] strwbryflvrmochi: sorta
[17:37] strwbryflvrmochi: i'm not too sure
[17:37] hellokuty16: whaddya mean sorta
[17:38] strwbryflvrmochi: i'm not sure
[17:38] strwbryflvrmochi: i think i like him o.o
[17:38] hellokuty16: do you think about him a lot?
[17:38] hellokuty16: and get upset over stupid shit he does?
[17:38] strwbryflvrmochi: yea, his butt is why i nap all the time now
[17:38] hellokuty16: LOL
[17:38] strwbryflvrmochi: ever since prom
[17:38] strwbryflvrmochi: i nap
[17:38] strwbryflvrmochi: like every other day
[17:38] hellokuty16: well then that should tell you
[17:39] hellokuty16: if he's a gigantic portion of your thoughts in a day
[17:39] hellokuty16: then you probably like him
[17:39] hellokuty16: so if you do i'd suggest flirting more obviously
[17:39] hellokuty16: that way it makes it easier on him to flirt back
[17:40] hellokuty16: and THEN
[17:40] hellokuty16: when he gets comfortable enough to say something
[17:40] hellokuty16: he will :)you just have to give guys a bit more time
[17:40] hellokuty16: he's a NOOB! :P
[17:40] hellokuty16: be nice to them!
[17:41] strwbryflvrmochi: i know he's a noob
[17:41] strwbryflvrmochi: rofl
[17:42] hellokuty16: he just needs to know you like him first i guess...to give him the confidence to make it obvious to you. Guys are retarded - i repeat. Just have balls.
[17:43] strwbryflvrmochi: omg
[17:43] strwbryflvrmochi: i freaking held his hand last week
[17:43] strwbryflvrmochi: and put my head on his shoulder
[17:43] strwbryflvrmochi: HOW MUCH MORE OBVIOUS CAN YOU GET?!
[17:44] hellokuty16: SOoOO?!?!
[17:45] hellokuty16: you guys are best friends
[17:45] hellokuty16: that's not unusual
[17:45] hellokuty16: there's a different vibe when flirting - in that way
[17:45] strwbryflvrmochi: rofl
[17:45] hellokuty16: like...i can hold my friends' hands w/o them thinking anything weird
[17:46] hellokuty16: like silly red rover red rover style
[17:46] hellokuty16: and put my head on their shoulders when im being pouty or whatever
[17:46] hellokuty16: that's not flirting
[17:46] hellokuty16: that's just being close
[17:46] hellokuty16: that's not obvious at all :P
[17:46] hellokuty16: NOWWWWWWWW flirting...ho ho ho
[17:46] hellokuty16: is like
[17:46] hellokuty16: grabbing his hand
[17:47] hellokuty16: and getting all zomigards /blush zomgzomg XD
[17:47] hellokuty16: iono
[17:47] hellokuty16: making him feel special
[17:47] strwbryflvrmochi: o.o'
[17:47] strwbryflvrmochi: he cuddled me after prom?
[17:48] hellokuty16: i can cuddle my best friends too
[17:48] hellokuty16: dude basically if you can do it to me
[17:48] hellokuty16: it's not flirting or not obvious enough at least
[17:48] hellokuty16: guys are slow
[17:48] strwbryflvrmochi: rofl bwahahhahaa
[17:48] hellokuty16: but like - they get hurt by it
[17:48] hellokuty16: like if you get all huggy with him
[17:49] hellokuty16: he'll think about it but then also think that you might not be into him too
[17:49] hellokuty16: depending on how much he likes you
[17:49] hellokuty16: and his confidence
[17:50] strwbryflvrmochi: ....
[17:51] hellokuty16: just flirt more
[17:51] hellokuty16: and make it obvious that you're interested
[17:51] hellokuty16: you can't be mean to him if you like him
[17:52] hellokuty16: even if you really really really really want to
[17:52] strwbryflvrmochi: but
[17:52] strwbryflvrmochi: he tickles me like crazy
[17:52] hellokuty16: well - i mean...if you want to figure out if he likes you, you can't be mean to him
[17:52] strwbryflvrmochi: =(
[17:53] strwbryflvrmochi: i should be able to be mean to him if he gets to tickle me
[17:55] strwbryflvrmochi: meh
[17:55] strwbryflvrmochi: meh!
[17:58] strwbryflvrmochi: maybe if we have time on thursday i'll talk to him
[17:58] hellokuty16: lol
[17:58] hellokuty16: don't scare him
[17:58] hellokuty16: he's a scared little boy
[17:59] strwbryflvrmochi: pft
[17:59] strwbryflvrmochi: stephan's not scared of anything
[17:59] hellokuty16: make him feel comfortable enough to want to tell you on his own
[17:59] strwbryflvrmochi: and little boys can't have a license
[17:59] hellokuty16: pft
[17:59] strwbryflvrmochi: he won't
[17:59] hellokuty16: you think he isn't scared
[17:59] hellokuty16: but if he wasn't
[17:59] strwbryflvrmochi: he barely tells me anything
[17:59] hellokuty16: he wouldn't have held out telling you this long
[18:00] strwbryflvrmochi: saya thought liked me
[18:00] hellokuty16: DUDE HE DOES
[18:00] strwbryflvrmochi: how are you so sure?
[18:00] hellokuty16: i just know :P
[18:00] strwbryflvrmochi: is this some weird japanese telepathic thing?
[18:01] strwbryflvrmochi: because that'd be pretty badass
[18:01] hellokuty16: nah
[18:01] hellokuty16: lets just say a similar situation happened to me once
[18:01] strwbryflvrmochi: rofl
[18:02] strwbryflvrmochi: he'll never open up to me at this rate
[18:02] hellokuty16: yeah i felt like that too
[18:02] strwbryflvrmochi: i haven't even met one person in his family
[18:02] strwbryflvrmochi: i've seen his sister twice
[18:02] strwbryflvrmochi: his mom once
[18:02] hellokuty16: slow down :P
[18:02] strwbryflvrmochi: and stephan's met like my whole family
[18:02] strwbryflvrmochi: AND the dog
[18:03] hellokuty16: just let things go
[18:03] hellokuty16: and make it obvious that you like him
[18:03] hellokuty16: things'll work out
[18:03] hellokuty16: i promise
[18:03] strwbryflvrmochi: i like how you're so confident about this
[18:03] hellokuty16: dude
[18:05] hellokuty16: well i've gone through it before
[18:06] hellokuty16: well i gg
[18:06] hellokuty16: but good luck :P
[18:06] strwbryflvrmochi: lol
[18:06] strwbryflvrmochi: thanks
[18:06] strwbryflvrmochi: take care
[18:06] strwbryflvrmochi: come visit ussss!
[18:06] hellokuty16: you too :P
[18:06] hellokuty16: i will ^_^

...sheesh. >.<

where have i heard this conversation before - except the person explaining was Josh...and the confused person was me.

<3 carpe diem <3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

+3:27 PM]*

xoxo~

atari's here.

keewan, zomigards.../pwnsssss he is so 1337, it's amazing.

XD

<3 carpe diem <3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

+10:41 AM]*

xoxo~

Too many names/nicknames... >.>

Christine
Michie
Kuty
Titine
Kitty
Biscuit
DoiBoiBoi
Mycheesy
Fromagette
Tofu<3
Mjorn
...and more.

whaaaaaa...:P I'm too much of a squaresoft RPGer. I want to be able to heal as well as dps. /cast regen /cast big guard /cast curaga /cast ultima /quad slash /use megalixir /cast knights of the round /mime /mime /mime, lol.

I want to do it all.

<3 carpe diem <3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

+8:22 AM]*

xoxo~

now playing: Ginuwine - What's so Different

<3 i had so much fun over the last few days. LoL, yeah it's been one of the most quiet birthdays i've ever had - really...but it was honestly so perfect, i couldn't wish for a better one.

lol? i wanted to go to the bonfire, really!! I ended up not going because of the Josh lecture, lol. "Would you be able to find a ride home..." "I'm just worried that you'll need a ride or a way to get home and it's far." I txt'd him back, "i'm not drinking."

I only drink when I'm around people who I trust. :P The whole, drunken stupor thing...yeah...i've learned my lesson. YUCK.

LOL i cried when they left, hahaha. I <3 them lots.

Osaka's an only child too. Haha...us hitorikkos have to stick together. :P

"Shoji's like the male version of you - or you're like the female version of Shoji." Well no, not really - we have major differences...lots of them, but our processing in "if then else" statements runs true. We just handle situations really similar. Well hmm...then again, Frank and I handle situations pretty similar too. But i'm "readable". They're both not, I guess. Maybe I'm not readable, i have no idea. >.< I figured it was really easy to figure out when i was grumpy/happy/upset/etc.

I dunno, Osaka said the abovementioned comment. I think i'm 10x more of an asshole than Sho though. He's so nice >.<.

LOL we had a conversation last night about holding back when playing video games. LOL I TRY TRY TRY not to do that in WoW. I usually don't hold back - but when i do, you can usually tell. :P

We have this factor in common, I guess. I don't want to upset the person i'm playing against...so i'd much rather just let them win other than me winning over and over again. I dunno, I got so used to letting people win, that now my strategy lol has changed. It's just funny - because it's a strategy to lose but look like you're playing. Like, in puzzle fighter, I won't place bombs where blocks are going to fall, or I won't use up my diamond. >.> Yeah, i won't use it...or I'll use it on something small so it doesn't hurt the other person. Now how i make it look like i'm trying - is making hugeass blocks...and if they attack me, i'll break the blocks to counter. It's a total "on the defensive" playstyle. You fight against what they throw at you - and not dps at all basically.

I know, it sounds assholey - but i honestly don't have much control over it anymore. Even if i saw a bomb, my immediate instinct isn't to break my hugeass block tower anymore - it's to put it in a stupid spot that'll give my opponent time to crush me.

The "hugeass block towers" are basically my divine sheild.

Last time i went down to LA, I didn't hold back against Shoji the first few fights - he's a formidable opponent. Anyway, i won 6 times in a row [like uber pwnage] and then they didn't want to fight against me, T_T so i immediately flipped the switch to "who's Q?" and didn't win any game after that.

I think you could tell that the strategy changed, but w/e - i hate that feeling. I don't want to be better than anyone. I want to be a better player in general...not better THAN someone else. I like aiming towards the top - not being at the top.

Even in DPS, Its hard sometimes. I don't wanna go all out. I end up pulling aggro and/or just looking elitest. LoL i almost typed titlest.

ANYWAY, Shoji does that too. I figured it something we both have to work on. He wants me to get good @ virtua fighter, lol. Hahaha, fighting games + michie = lots of wasted time. I really want to get good at Cervantes - soul calibur 3. He's so awesome. I got pretty good @ Kilik, but just beating hard mode a few times doesn't compare to fighting other people.

LOL i know, "you don't like winning?" LOL I just hate winning at the expense of someone else. I love winning when it's co-op, or umm...even AB/WSG/Eye of the Storm - because i trick myself to think it's PVE. I don't win ALL the time - I'm really not the best at all, I just know that I play certain games pretty well and don't want to give my opponent a hard time at ALL considering it probably means more to them than it does to me to win a duel/match or whatever.

I want to fight against someone who's really really good - and get pwn3d...and learn from it, fight again...and get pwn3d but get a little closer to winning...then learn from what mistakes i did and strategize how to amplify the opponents weaknesses and zone in on them. I just like taking on shit that's bigger than me.

I BEAT A ROGUE yesterday. When I get ganked, i usually don't try so hard - even if it's horde. It's usually not that big of a deal, but I rarely ever use pots or anything when its just a world pvp situation. Just kill me, so you can get your happies from my kill, and let me go so i can freaking continue on my instance. Anyway, this lvl 70 rogue sapped me in area 52. I was sure i'd die, but i figured i'd try a little, so i sent flaroon at him...deathcoiled and put up dots. ANYWAY, I was just about to give up and die - and i realized i had a healthstone. Anyway it crit 4700, and LOL...i could just hear the person behind that computer say, GODDAMNIT why WONT YOU JUST DIE YOU FREAKING WARLOCK!? then my dots killed him. :P

I love it. I didn't even have to fear. You're just as squishy as me you retard. I have a felguard that cleaves.

now leave me alone.

I gg to work but i'll blog later.

***

Photos of the day:

I have a bubble tooooossss

1337 Lifetaps

michie's a gnome priest. i can fake +700ish healing. LoL <3

LOL I finally found out where that flying goblin came from.

LOL i had screenshots and research looking for it before. I'd see them around IF, and wonder wtf where did they come from? :P

I just thought this shot was cute. LoL, it's silly. Azer's sneaking around, haha.

Michie got a new robe. <3

kthxbai

<3 carpe diem <3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Monday, May 07, 2007-)
+11:59 AM]*

xoxo~

Now Playing: 80s Music Playlist and lumidee feat. tony sunshine - she's like the wind

For some reason, 80s music makes me smile. XD It's just so corny - that it's wonderful.

***

Iced Mint Tea is SO yum on a nice day like today.

***

I got enough balls and advice...haha, and posted on the Lost Anarchy forums. Yeah, I applied. LOL, I had no idea how big they were. I guess it's just funny that even Frank knew who they were. I just was looking for an alternate guild that raided Kara/Gruul's/Magtheridon. Reechani said to apply - i don't even know who that is. I think he's called something else more familiar...and that Reechani is his alt or something. >.< Either way...i do want to experience Gruul's and Magtheridon one day.

Why did I decide upon applying you might ask? Well for a while, i've felt like the raid progression within our internal group wasn't moving fast enough. There are times when i've spoken up and tried to help out a bit - but my help has fallen onto deaf ears, i guess. I just don't think our guild is serious enough to run hard raids - yet at least. Not that I am either, but that's why I want to learn. I've spent waay too much time AND EFFORT on Michie to just be content with her current stats. It is in the end just another game that I try to complete as much as I can.

Changing raiding parties has nothing to do with Sol's leadership, really. Honestly, last nights Kara run was aweful, but it wasn't completely Sol's fault.

The stuff that I was annoyed about last night was...like, the hissy fit about me asking Fufee to make Adept's Elixirs before the raid. "Why did you ask right before the raid?!" UH, so i wouldn't take up time during it? Isn't that self explanitory? Apparently it's not okay for me to take up 5 minutes, but it's okay for Sol to take up an hour DURING the middle of the raid getting his +Stamina gear ready. OR another example was like, when I was explaining part of a strategy. Sol said, "Shhshshhshhh! We wanna keep vent clean for the raid." which I then replied, "Yeah, you're one to talk about keeping vent clean." and Fufee backed me up. Basically he means, "Shut up, only i'm allowed to talk...not anyone else." That's fine if he KNEW what to do - but he still not that familiar with Karazhan to be dictating what to do.

Overall, I'm just not a fan in following command when the commander isn't adequately prepared for the battle. I'm not saying I'd be better off, or anyone in our party would be better off. I'm just saying that it doesn't take much to go on WoW Wiki and read up on the battle strategy and know approximately what to do ahead of time. The thing is, if you're going to lead a battle, KNOW where to go at least - or what people should be doing. I hate being lost - it's like, one of my biggest pet peeves ever. Everytime I go along to Kara, it feels as though there isn't a good balance of "On the fly - fun stuff" and "Organized Strategy". It's usually..."on the fly" stuff all the time. I mean, the "organized strategy" stuff is definitely way more boring than on the fly, but in the instances we're targeting/doing, HOLY CRAP - 4 HOURS and only completing the CHESS EVENT is not something to be proud of. MY GOD. If I HAD TO LEAD it, I'd at least read over the strategy on WoWWiki, discuss it with the group and try to figure out the best solution with our group makeup. Not just GO THERE, and DIE a bunch of times with the intention of learning while we die. NO, you learn what the boss does, take a quick break to figure out what to do, get everyone ready - and fight him. Then you possibly die, then re strategize and do it again.

Yeah yeah, Sol was trying to do that. He even changed gear for it. I GET IT - but HOLY CRAP, 2k more health isn't going to save you if the boss happens to 4 hit kill you instead of the 3 hit kill that happened last time. Anything's possible. It's a GROUP event. The 2k health isn't going to benefit everyone as a whole. I've never fought prince in that hallway before. With artifice we fought him where Sol was tanking. I started explaining it - but I was told to "keep vent clean". FINE, i've learned from Graviton - "Let go and let them fall on their face".

I dunno, I just thought our plan of attack on Kara was just wrong. We should've finished Aran first to get the teleportation. The teleportation saves us so much time when we wipe. Kara is HUGE. Do you know how long it takes to run back to prince after wiping? EVEN IF we take the back way - it's still a good half hour to get everyone ready.

Then...at the Shade of Aran, that was annoying in itself. Only 3 of us had done it before - and Sol, our MT didn't really want to do it, and I BET YOU didn't give it 100%. WE DIED within the first minute.

OH ANOTHER ANNOYING SPOT TOO: so...in one section of kara, locks have to fear this voidwalkers before they die - because it prevents them from doing an arcane aoe blast at death. I feared each one - and when i started fearing the first guy, Sol complained, "ZOMG NO FEARS" and when it prevented the aoe...he was like, "OHhhhhh nice fear!" Then when i did the 2nd one, he said, "Ohhh nice fear, that one was a little early though." DAMNIT, IT didn't explode, RIGHT? Isn't that enough?

The grumpiness with Sol was separate from the looking for alt kara/gruul's runs. The whole Sol thing was just because I finally got fed up with being treated like a 5 year old. I think he singles me out too. He literally talks to me like, "Okay Michie, now what you're going to do is...[explain warlock strategy here]." Not that i'm a great warlock or anything, but jesus christ, I know how to play my class decently well enough. Jeez, thanks for the faith in me, or in actuality - lack thereof. Like i've never played WoW in my life, seriously.

When he was needing +sta buffs for prince too, i even gave him my jug of whateverthefuck alcohol that gives you a +15 sta buff. He was like "PFT wtf is this?" kinda brushed it off. Not that i expect him to go all ZOMG MICHIE YOU SAVED US ALL, or anything, but goddamn, it was FREE to him. He could've at least said thanks since we were all WAITING on him and trying to help. I dunno, the "Pft..." just sounded so elitist - like I was being looked down upon like a child giving their parent something trivial, i guess.

LOL, and after ALL of that...he invited Cyler to raid after I left. They gave him the vent info also. I think that was the absolute frosting on the cake.

That was when the frustration was so high, that I took a step back - took a breather...and re-reminded myself that it's just a game, and so if it IS...JUST A GAME, that i'd treat it as one - and start raiding seriously. No fucking around anymore. That's all.

He usually isn't that mean to me. I dunno what was up. Maybe i'm overreacting, but even Osaka noticed. I don't usually put up with bullshit. This is an instance where I DO put up with it, when i shouldn't. At least i'm taking steps to further Michies progress instead of watching her get outgeared by EVERY warlock i've raided with BECAUSE we're still running the same Kara bosses months after we've started.

CHESS!?! OMFG I HATE the CHESS EVENT. That's NOT a raid - that's a fucking SIDE quest with free loot. If I wanted to do a loot quest, i would've quested on my own or FARMED for motes.

***

On another note...

I WISH i could post up screenies from the shattered halls run with Yuki and Warlocks. It honestly made my day.

<3

I gg back to work. I'll post it later.

<3 carpe diem <3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Friday, May 04, 2007-)
+1:11 AM]*

xoxo~

We need a paladin for sunday's kara raid.

I haven't decided yet. :\

new crit. :P I went back to the netherweave set. It's just better overall for warlocks. It's probably one of the best +dpg set pieces in the game.

so much +sta, it's crazy.

<3 carpe diem <3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Wednesday, May 02, 2007-)
+2:55 PM]*

xoxo~

god jesus...this is hard

***
Killing time while reels burn...

1. Do you still talk to the person you lost your virginity to?
Haha I sure hope so? That'd be kinda weird if I didn't.

2. Is it harder to be rejected or to reject someone?
OH GOD, rejecting someone is way worse?!?!! Who cares if you get rejected. I know it sounds cliche but there are plenty of fish in the sea - really.

3. What kind of music did you listen to in elementary school?
Everything, really.

4. What is the best thing about your current job?
I help make video games, lol. :D

5. Do you wish cell phone etiquette was a required class?
Isn't it required everywhere?

6. What's the last thing you drank?
Pom: Pomegranate Blackberry Black Tea

7. Have you been on a date in the past week?
Nope, i haven't really been on a date for 7 years. XD

8. Where are you going on your next vacation?
Prods get vacations!? That's ludicrous, lol.

9. Have you ever thrown up from working out?
Ew, no? I don't think I've ever been in a situation where I've had to work out that that that that much.

10. Are most of the friends in your life new or old?
Both

11. Have you ever gotten so wasted you didn't know what was going on?
Hah, no comment.

12. Do you like pulp-y orange juice?
Depends on my mood.

13. Are you touchy feely?
When I'm drunk. Overall, not really.

14. Did you cry at your high school graduation?
LoL, unfortunately...yes.

15. Do you prefer the tanning bed or the sun?
Tanning beds suck and the sun burns me.

16. What are some of your favorite places to eat?
Chipotle.

17. What could you tolerate..someone that snores or a sleep walker?
Sleep Walking. I'm too light of a sleeper to sleep next to a snorer.

18. Do you consider yourself bi-polar?
Nope

19. What's something your friends make fun of you for?
I'm the worst rogue ever.

20. What's your worst personality flaw?
I've got lots. Don't get me started.

22. Would you ever parachute off of a plane?
Do you want to have your balls ripped off your body?

23. Have you ever ridden an elephant?
Yup - at some county fair thing when i was a kid.

24. Are you Irish in any way?
Nope.

25. Have you ever ridden in a U-Haul?
Nope, I'm from a family of ford/chevy truckers.

26. Do you like to play Scrabble?
I guess?

27. Have you ever been to a nude beach?
Hah no.

28. Have you ever drank Jack Daniels?
Jack & Coke, FTW.

29. Have you ever had sex on the beach?
The drink? or the act? Hah, i'm not even going to answer either.

30. What are you saving your money up for right now?
LoL, mats for my spellstrike + shadoweave sets.

31. What was the last gift card you received?
Coach & EB.

32. Have you ever gone skinny dipping?
Not lately, thank god.

33. Does the number of people a person's slept with affect your opinion of them?
Yeah probably. I'm not into neighborhood bicycles.

34. Have you ever gone to a party where you were the only straight person?
Hah yeah XD...

35. What do you do when you spy a bug in your house?
depends on what type of bug it is.

36. What is your favorite children's movie?
i go back and forth on this one. either the little mermaid or robin hood.

god. done.

<3 carpe diem <3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

+12:51 PM]*

xoxo~

GAH! i had to edit the essay again.

It's revised...and "Not too CHUMMY"

i also put in more "MEAT" and gave clearer examples by using a WoW instance - as a comparitive study.

LOL - well i really don't want to put anyone down. not knowing what to do isn't anyones fault.

I just want to point out what happened and how we can fix it. NERDDDDDDDD

it makes my heart glitter trying to figure it out, i'm not even kidding.

<3 carpe diem <3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Tuesday, May 01, 2007-)
+11:59 PM]*

xoxo~

Christine-Michie Hara
Game Porfolio 2

Student Projects

Ever get that feeling like you have just said something that made complete sense in your head, but when translated into English (or any other language), the point was totally misconstrued? I guess it would kind of resemble an idiom. Hah, like if you ever visit Japan and refer to yourself having quite a “Green Thumb”, they would assume you to have some type of gangrene or disease.

Try your hardest to invision a Real Time Strategy game. Imagine your battalion is composed of a group of ten students – all interested in Game Design; their ages ranging from a mere fifteen years old to thirty. Within this rag-tag group, there are three Seniors, two Juniors, two Sophomores, and three Freshmen. Keep in mind that there are only two people: one Senior and one Junior that have gone through the required Game Portfolio 1 and 2 courses. The remaining Seniors were not required to take Game Portfolio 2 due to the change in graduation requisites in CVI, versus DAA. All in all, there are basically only two people out of this whole list that are proficient in the Game Development Cycle.

Hmm, it already sounds like a bad group makeup to start off with, doesn’t it? But even the bad portions of it seem like it has promise.

Many Cogswell students fit a mold. I know it’s horrible to label people or put them into categories, but most Cogswellians definitely don’t fit the standard cookie cutter mold. This “revised” mold being: kids from very privileged homes, supportive families, somewhat spoiled, “nerdy”/“dorky”/“geeky”, introverted, some who are anti-social. Many of them were home schooled at some point and/or sent to private institutions. I even fit this mold.

Now, I know you’re reading this thinking, this has absolutely nothing to do with the process of working with small teams – especially student based teams and/or the Game Development Cycle. I beg to differ. The first step of successfully producing a project is to know enough about your teammates to properly gauge which Development Cycle the team requires that would benefit their unique makeup.

This is where I failed. Yeah, I know…I failed right off the bat. It was definitely a mistake I’ll never make again. I failed because they were all my friends – not because I didn’t have the knowledge of how to manage a group of people. When project managing, the producer must objectify everything and take everything for face value. As a friend, you tend to put yourself out on the line more by taking on more tasks, giving into sporadic decisions, letting things “slide”, or the best one – not enforcing rules that are there for a reason. It’s a “noob” mistake that I’m well aware of. Even then, when enforcing rules, since they're your friends - the likelyhood of them listening to you and/or taking you seriously is highly unlikely as well.

I took it upon myself to try to teach this diverse group of Game Design students a standard game design protocol; basically a sim-industry project. Yes I know Master Yoda, "Do or do not. There is no try." But that's where the friendship factor fits in and the attempt to make everyone happy comes into play. Honestly, Game Club has made a myriad of games already and tacking yet another one to the list of “okay games Game Club has made” wouldn’t be impressive (not to me at least). What I thought would stand out was an IGF submission. This is where my first statement about the idioms fits in. They just wanted to make another Game Club game and I shot for the stars – it’s the “only way I roll”. One gigantic part of my naïve tendencies; When I see potential in a group, I’d much rather sacrifice everything for the possible reward in the end. Carpe diem, n'ést-ce pas? I just figure it's quality over quantity.

Now when aiming towards an IGF submission, the requirements are much higher tiered than any game Game Club has ever made. Nothing they’ve made so far would’ve even passed the preliminary rounds. With that in mind, it provided a great excuse to start a sim-industry experiment. Within our group of friends, we started delegating specific roles for people: Creative Director, Producer, Lead Artist, Lead Programmer, Lead Game Designer, etc. Imagine, two people in a class – who know the DevCycle drill decently enough – trying to convince a whole eight other unaware students what their roles are. First of all, trying to hand over a basket of responsibility to students who have never had that experience before is one obstacle, next is keeping that person motivated without material incentives or legitimate ultimatums. I am not their parent, teacher, or police officer. I cannot force them to do anything they do not "feel" like doing - especially if they are not required to do any of it; when it is voluntary.

This is where the petite summary of their backgrounds come into play. Many of them have never had someone request tasks of them without some type of material incentive/ultimatum backing it. Many of them have never had the responsibility of meeting a deadline that did not really have a consequence other than hindering own personal growth. They have basically had to answer to their parents who might or might not discipline them, and/or teachers who would scold them or possibly lower their grade. Since it only has the incentive of gaining knowledge, most young people could "give a shit less" and not feel the need to give it 100%. That's where the maturity level exposes itself. Why wouldn't anyone want to learn more? I just don't understand it. As if our parents are going to support us financially for the rest of our lives - and even if that were an option, why take advantage of them when every Cogswell student has the potential of becoming something great on their own?

I don't pretend to know everything about Game Design, ever. I really don't know – I’m only 22 years old. What I do know, is that if there is something I do not understand, asking is always the best solution. Within this industry you are forced to take the initiative. A major hindrance in this project was the fact that a majority of the team were not fully aware of what was expected of their roles. Not knowing roles, lacking knowledge on a basic DevCycle, having no experience working with Game Documents, and last but not least…lacking the social skills for better communication all equate to a bad situation. I remember calling all the people on our team and only ONE person picked up; it did not help that it happened to be the other person who already understood the basic DevCycle. This goes back to the “Cogswell Mold” and not having “sandbox time” as kids. I can be persistent and try to contact them, but if my words are falling onto deaf ears, then it really doesn’t help anyone. I then officially become the pet rock that smiles and nods.

This is where I was advised to let go, and let them learn from experience.

Overall, when looking for a group for a project/dungeon/raid - whatever, it is ideal to have a balanced group of experienced individuals. Not everyone has to know all the details about what the group is about to face, but they definitely need to know their roles. For example, in World of Warcraft, my guild had just started raiding Karazhan [this higher level 10man instance]. In a nutshell, there were aspects of Karazhan that made it the hardest instance any of us had been to at that point. What made it hard was that, most of us did not have great gear leaving our bonus spell damage, bonus melee damage, and bonus healing at quite a disadvantage. Also, only four of us had been to Karazhan separately before, and I was the only one who had completed the whole raid, allowing inexperience aka "Noobness" to cause many problems. To make a long story short, it was a really hard raid - but we persevered and completed 80% of the instance our first time through with minimal deaths; when comparitively - it took many of the hardcore raiding guilds on our server a few runs to get to the 50% mark.

I bring up this instance of Karazhan, because it is exactly what could happen in an ideal situation; what I hope for. The reason why we did so well is that one person spoke of their experience and regardless of if it was right or wrong, everyone listened and learned from it. Everyone knew their roles well enough where if at any point, there was a lack of direction, someone would be able to pick up the pieces and continue on. There was constant communication and delegation of new tasks when situations would arise. We had no idea what was coming - but damnit, when things did pop up, we were ready for it. There were set rules and protocol that everyone followed. I know this sounds silly, but since they followed the protocol, it made the raid move twice as fast. There was never any confusion with everyone constantly either already knowing what they need to do - or were immediately indicated what to do. We all leave our egos at the door when there is a larger stake at hand.

With all the aforementioned handicaps, I would not do the same project [working from a club and friend based group] over again if given the opportunity. I would pitch it as a class [Game Design: DevCycle 1&2]- where everyone had not only a personal growth motivating factor, but a ultimatum of not passing the class/possibly not graduating as well. This would force students to contribute 100% of their effort towards a larger project, even an IGF submission - that could possibly affect their graduation. With these road blocks in mind the group would be forced to learn what constitutes a proper DevCycle and/or team, basically creating as much of a sim-industry like environment as possible. It also retains the motivating/ultimatum factor as well as guidance from teachers from school that many students still quite possibly need. They would be forced to know what is required of certain roles and the egos would have to be left at the door; there are no egos in a classroom - just production, results, and reward/incentive [which could be a grade as well as a great IGF sumission]. Also, enforcing rules becomes less of an issue within a classroom environment. People tend to listen more to a "superior" versus a classmate. There is no confusion when everyone is expected to produce what they are taught and since the product is within the lesson plans' requirements - everyone is consistently on the same page.

What I’ve learned from this experience is that it really doesn’t matter what you know – it matters what everyone understands and what tactics you’re willing to use to ensure that everyone is on the same page. Production is a real life RTS. Every team needs organization and direction – it’s how you motivate people to want to follow direction is the key.

<3 carpe diem <3
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+6:04 PM]*

xoxo~

I saw a single ladybug today...and a second later it was gone.

My grandma told me that they're good luck if you see one by itself.

Who knows? Maybe that mount will drop tonight /shrug.

***

On another note, I guess the topic i've been going back and forth on lately is the server transfer thing. I'm getting Frank a WoW game card for his birthday regardless, because i already said i would. I haven't decided if i'm going to move Azer over to Ner'zhul - and if i'm going to play him at that yet.

Yeah, I know...I know...I wanted to play Azer for a while. Why for the sudden change? Meh, because it's not about playing his paladin, I guess. I can play Miichiie or even Gegsn, if i really wanted to. It's not even because of his alchemy either...lol, Justin has 350+ alch on one of his characters...and so does Osaka. [Not that i'd ever really bug them to make me pots either...but that's a whole other story.]

He used to be really into WoW - and that was fun. He doesn't care for it much anymore, and thus eliminating my enthousiasm to move him over to my server. I'm sure he'd play Azer every once in a while, but he'd get bored again, hate being on my server, get behind in gear and not be motivated to instance for better. Then what, yeah - i guess i COULD play his character and help him get geared [which wouldn't make any sense because i SHOULD be getting Michie geared], or i could just fucking suck it up and lvl up Miichiie.

I just thought it'd be nice to have another eligible Paladin come with us to our raids; another IRL friend at that. I would bet that he's had his fill of raiding already though. I'm not upset about it, really...I'm just leaning towards a hmmm well he can come over to my server if he wants to and we'll be waiting for him - or...he could just reactivate his WoW account whenver he's ready and stay on Mug'thol if that's what makes him happy.

He doesn't even have to renew his WoW account at that. It's a game card. He can fucking sell it if he doesn't wanna play anymore.

I'm just tired of trying to persuade him to come play with me. He obviously doesn't want to, so I'm not going to force him.

Yeah, yeah...he's just busy right now, I know...w/e. If he's busy, and having fun having a social life [which he's refrained from doing most of his time @ cogswell b/c of WoW] I'm seriously not going to be the one responsible for making him re-hermit. Do you even know how HARD it was to get him out of the house and OFF OF WoW? He would NOT leave an AV - I SWEAR, nevertheless a RAID for Christ's sake.

Yeah, i think i've made up my mind. I'd like to be able to sign on Michie & Azer at the same time, send myself mats for elixirs, make them...and continue playing as whichever one is needed - but honestly...if he's not going to care about Azer anymore, then it's not worth the effort.

YEAHHHHH QQ. I guess it wouldn't suck as much if he was a terrible paladin. Actually, now that I think about it - he never really healed/buffed me ever. BASTARD. AND HE THINKS he's helping by being an asshole, but he's SO NOT, it's not even funny. LOL, everytime I lifetap, gegsn heals me. I even call out in vent - OMG NO HEALS! CONSERVE YOUR MANA! WHY?? Because I can lifedrain! You're making some of my spells be useless! LoL...and the ONE TIME i say, FRANK can i get a heal?, he says, "NO, you HAVE your food." The only reason why I remember that is because Josh rubs it in like NO other. LOL I NEVER ask for heals - ever...OMFG, YOU HAVE FOOD. HOLY FUCKING JERUSALEM. Even in raids, i RARELY ever speak in vent asking for a heal. I speak up when i need a cleanse or goddamn, maybe a salv...or if my BoK is gone...but NEVER for a heal.

Okay that actually made me feel better, haha. It's not like I've really played with him or gotten much paladin support at that, so I can't really gauge how great of a paladin he is. I just remember him letting me die at Baron, and not rezzing me - i think. A BoP would've been nice.

Okay hah. i'm better. i'm going to sign on WoW for 30ish and get back to hw.

Adios.

<3 carpe diem <3
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+12:40 PM]*

xoxo~

Yargh myspace is teh devil.

GEMINI - The One that Waits
Dominant in relationships. Someone loves them right now. Always Wants the last word. Caring. Smart. Loud. Loyal. Beautiful. Goofy. Easy to talk to. Everything you ever wanted. Easy to please. The one and only.

AQUARIUS - The flirt
silly fun and sweet.Has the last word. Good to find, hard to keep. Fun to be around. Extremely weird but in a good way. Loves relationships, Addictive. very energetic

PISCES - The Addict
EXTREMELY adorable. Intelligent. Loves to joke. Very Good sense of humor. Energetic. Predict future. GREAT kisser. Always get what they want. Attractive. Easy going. Loves being in long relationship. Talkative. Romantic. Caring.

LEO - The Cool One
Nice to everyone they meet. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, Fun and sweet. Have own unique appeal. Most caring person Ever meet! however not the kind of person you wanna mess with... u might end up crying...

CANCER - The Smart One.
Trustworthy. Attractive. Great kisser. One of a kind. Loves being In long-term relationships. Extremely energetic. Unpredictable. Will exceed your expectations. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out.

ARIES- The Irresistible One
Nice Love is one of a kind. Great listeners...Lover not a fighter, but will still knock you out. Trustworthy. Always happy. Loud. Talkative. Outgoing VERY FORGIVING. Loves to make out. Has a beautiful smile. Generous. Strong. THE MOST IRRESISTIBLE.

SAGITTARIUS-The Slut
Great talker. Attractive and passionate. Laid back. Knows how to Have fun. Is really good at almost anything. Great kisser. Unpredictable. Outgoing. Down to earth. Addictive. Attractive. Loud. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. Not one to mess with. Rare to find. Good when found.

TAURUS - The Aggresive One
Great KISSER. Very high appeal. Love is one of a kind. Very romantic. Surprisingly and unknowingly, will be the most caring person you will ever meet! Entirely creative. Extremely random and proud of it. Freak/Weird. Spontaneous. Feelings change on a whim. Great at telling Stories. Not a Fighter, But will knock your lights out if it comes down to it. Someone you should hold on to.

LIBRA - The Partner for Life
Caring and kind. Smart. Center of attention. Has the last word. Good to find, hard to keep. Fun to be around. Extremely weird but in a good way. Good Sense of Humor!!! Thoughtful. Always gets what he or she wants. Loves to joke. Very popular. Silly, fun and sweet.

CAPRICORN - The Cute One
Love to bust. Nice. Sassy. Intelligent. Sexy. Predict future. Irresistible. Loves being in long relationships. Great talker. Always gets what he or she wants. Cool. Loves to own Geminis' in sports. Extremely fun. Loves to joke. Smart.

SCORPIO - The Gorgeous One
Loves being in long relationships. Likes to give a good fight for what they want. Extremely outgoing. Loves to help people in times of need. Best kisser. Good personality. Stubborn. Amazing in bed. A caring person. One of a kind.Gorgeous Smile.Not one to mess with. Are the most attractive people on earth!

VIRGO- The Promiscuous One
Spontaneous. Rare to find. Great when found. Loves being in long relationships. So much love to give. Not one to mess with. Very pretty. Very romantic. Nice to everyone they meet. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own unique appeal. Most caring person you will ever meet! Amazing in the you know where..!!! Not the kind of person you wanna mess with- you might end up crying.

***

TAURUS - The Aggresive One
Great KISSER. Very high appeal. Love is one of a kind. Very romantic. Surprisingly and unknowingly, will be the most caring person you will ever meet! Entirely creative. Extremely random and proud of it. Freak/Weird. Spontaneous. Feelings change on a whim. Great at telling Stories. Not a Fighter, But will knock your lights out if it comes down to it. Someone you should hold on to.

So yeah, that's kinda weird. I'm going through this in detail.

1. Iono about this one, lol...i think i'm pretty good though :D
2. I don't quite understand what high appeal is. Is that pulling aggro? or like...someone else pulling aggro - me being the npc?
3. Love is one of a kind. Hah, that's clearly an understatement. I'd pretty much do whatever necessary to make the other person happy [or at least prevent them from being sad] - it's weird.
4. Very romantic? Ahahahahhaaa...LOL ahahhaa, you wouldn't even know. o_O NOR would you ever find out - it's horrible. Then again, my ideas of romanticism and traditional peoples views might differ substancially.

I still love it when boys open the doors for girls though...or if it's a steep hill/rocky area, that they hold your hand to help you through it - even though IRL, i'm like...dude...it's just fucking rocks. It's the courtesy and compassion [I guess?] that make me happy.

LOL I AM SUCHHHHHHH a sheep in cactus clothing. DUDE! LOL WSR&J was like my favorite movie for the longest time. God you don't even want to know how many posters I had. THEY CAN'T BE TOGETHER! T_T That soundtrack was amazing too. HE FUCKING BRAVED TEH WORLD TO BE WITH HER. /sigh >.< i'd keep going but it's really sappy.
5. Caring? LOL I guess. [In WoW terms...] I'm the only support warlock I know. I'll intercept whatever's attacking you, dpspull the aggro, then drain-life tank just so you can recover. Hopefully my +healthstones'll crit for you in that time. LoL i doubt that i'm the most caring person ever, but i try to be.
6. Creative huh? Iono about this one. It's hard to be creative and...i guess objective. It's hard to not get influenced by everything around; where you can use your imagination and make something up for yourself.
7. Extremely Random: Haha...yeah - I can be. :) I enjoy it. I used to hate being "different" but fitting the cookie cutter mold is honestly so boring. I've tried - but being random and spontaneous is just so much more exciting in life. I figure you only live once, so Carpe Diem.
8. Feelings change on a whim?!?! Hahaha - sorta? Yeah - I can con myself in to feeling different about things. Usually the feeling is still there...but I can mask it and distract myself to the point where it's not apparent and I can almost make myself feel the opposite. For example, being someones friend. If they totally betray my trust, my inner feelings would want to forgive them and start over - but by breaking my trust I detach myself from them. I can do it like flicking a lightswitch.

Orrr...another good example...[lol i used to do this when i was younger...a lot more than now] My cousins and I grew up together. Because of that...they're like my brothers and we're so close that we're almost kinda mean to each other [it was worse when we were younger]. Anyway, just say if we went to the store - and there was something cool he saw [that i thought was cool too], if he said something like, "OMG this is so cool...i like this." I could immediately turn off my attachment to it like, "meh it's alright."

LOL I guess that works with people too. Before Damon and I started going out, there were quite a few girls that had crushes on him. I guess because I felt like he was getting a good amount of aggro, I automatically got turned off. LOL weird huh? Even if he most likely was interested in me, I almost felt like, "Meh, w/e...he's not thaaat big of a deal." even though he probably was worth being a big deal. Which is probably why I've never gone through that "Crush" stage. I never let any of the people I like become that HUGE of a deal. Maybe it's selfish, maybe it's a symptom of only child syndrome - who knows? I just figure it's a great way to not get too attached then hurt if things don't work out. Life's a gamble - you just have to stay as objective as possible. LOL spoken like a true robot, jesus.
9. Great at telling stories: Hmmm...i guess i'm pretty good at spilling the beans and making it sound just as interesting as when it happened. I tend to go on tangents a lot though >.<. If you're going to talk - at least make it sound interesting, right?
10. I really hate confrontation for the most part, but if i have to, i have NO utter hesitation to tell you or make you shut the fuck up and die. LOL okay maybe not THAT bad, but i usually won't hold back. Sometimes my silence speaks for itself...and other times, I will RIP you a new one.
11. I'm not sure if I'm someone you should hold on to, really. I was born with wings and I tend to do whatever the fuck i feel like doing. Hmm okay well...no, I do take into consideration concequences, etc...but i honestly do things on whims and don't get embarrased easily. Maybe saying i was born with wings is the wrong analogy...hmm free spirit, maybe? o_O

I am really difficult to be in a relationship with also. Not high maintenance perse... but in constant need of mental stimulus. LOL i know that sounds retarded, but it's not easy. We would have to be quite equally balanced of the knowledge we've acquired throughout the years - yet my counterpart would have to know more about certain specifics topics than I would and vice versa - so there's constant complimentary mental stimulus. Like they'd have to like video games for example - but like different types of games than me. It'd be boring if we'd agree on everything. There has to be a certain level of compatible individuality in you and your counterpart - yet the individuality remains complimentary within the relationship, i guess. [yeah i know... NERD!!! Shut up.]

I just like learning - so they couldn't just be content with their current knowledge. And with that in mind, it's fun to argue - but i couldn't be with someone who'd constantly not share many of the same views. We'd have to come from similar backgrounds to have a fair debate. Like, i couldn't possibly date 50 cent. I have no idea what it's like to be shot at 9 times, etc. So talking about [god i don't know] the war in iraq with him would be pointless. His views would be entirely different. OH God, and the fact that i'm a registered republican, hahaha...yeah i'm sure our compatibility would be blaringly obvious.

Don't hate on my republican-ness. My parents were/are i don't really know...so i auto reg'd that @ 18. I think i had other reasons too...but i can't remember them right now.

My mom's catholic. That's my answer.
Gah i gg, bbl.

<3 carpe diem <3
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