Prepare for a mini-novel, lol. I haven't had a chance to blog in a while - so there's an earful.
Now Playing: Augustana
It's a great morning already. The jet-lag has subsided, I remembered to bring my 5m memory pills, and there's a fresh pot o' coffee just CHILLIN waiting for me.
lol <3
I'm blogging on notepad only because I'm waiting for the fam to leave before I hijack their internetzz upstairs. It's $10 a day - lol, so I'm going to damn sure make the most out of my $10.
SO many things happened so far, lol I'd better start blogging. I'm so behind in blogger, it's not even funny.
Hmmm, I love the fact that there's a coffee pot right next to my computer - no sarcasm intended. It just brightens up my day just a little more. :P
So things I've learned about the east coast - Florida in particular:
1. Lack of diversity: LOL, nah it's not like it's the first time I was the only "Mulan Princess" at Cinderella's Ball. [What the hell was the name of the place where Cinderella was from? I almost said Caverns of Time, lol].
It's fun being Asian sometimes - lol. Well, you can play mindtricks on simple minded people and it's unfortunately very entertaining. They talk to me ever so slowly assuming that I don't understand english, lol. I always look at them questionably like, "HUH? I DON'T GET IT!! QQ WHA???" and they always talk slower and louder, hahaha. The more slowly & loudly they talk - the more I force myself to look like a bewildered lost Asian tourist. LOL once they've lost it and start whispering to each other, "WELL maybe we should find a translator for her!" I'll say, "Oh well thank you very much for the information, I'll be sure to visit the *place random location here* as well. /smile"
LOL - they always look so lost - haha it's wonderful. I know, I have a sick sense of humor sometimes...lol, I'm not making fun of their misfortune or anything...just slight misery. OH COME ON - It's not like they're not making me miserable in return calling me MULAN, lol.
2. Old People: Yeah, I know that there are a lot of old people here but good golly miss molly - there are a LOT. We went to the magic kingdom/polynesian resort yesterday - and holy god I wanna say 4 out of 5 people working were 50+year olds. and 3 out of 5 were 60+.
3. Obesity: Hmm...yeah, If i really said what I was thinking - it'd be so not PC, so I'm just going to pull a "Thumper" and hold that thought. It's kinda funny tho /wink. Lets just say - I currently have this gift of metabolism that many people don't have. If I EVER complain about my weight or size - just remind me of the 80% of the rest of the United States - and I'll shut up/feel better.
How does that happen? Okay, Okay - if you're old, sure...people tend to get a little chunkier as they age. There were so many children that were "TOO BIG" for their strollers - it was amazing. I mean - these were the kids that were like not even 2 years old and Mom's putting soda or mixing the 1 cup kool-aid things in their sippy cupps. What ever happened to freaking Juice or Milk? DAMN. DAMN? Maybe I'm that old fashioned - but my kid is NOT going to have fucking koolaid and/or SODA ESPECIALLY at fucking 2 years old. It's one thing to have them taste it - like if you already have the drink and they want a sip or something, and it's another thing to freaking fill their cup w/ it. Don't they go to the Dr's or READ books? DAMN?
4. Cost of Living: The cost of living over here is amazingly less. While I was waiting in the bathroom line, there was a native floridian woman complaining to her friends about having to pay $250 a month for a 1200 square foot 2 bedroom 2 bathroom house. Man oh man, what I WANTED to say was, "Oh you think that's bad? Lady, try living in California, even moreso the Bay Area. You have NO idea what high cost living is. Stop complaining and be grateful that there are states like this one that can accomodate for your income, DAMN!" lol i'm not being mad, i'm just frustrated at the ignorance, I guess.
$250 to rent a house - and it was a pretty nice neighborhood. That's fucking nuts. I couldn't rent a room - nevertheless a fucking bathroom - I couldn't even fucking rent a CAR in california for $250 a month, LOL. I guess It makes living in California that much more worth it. :) I love norcal - It's so posh and complex, yet you wouldn't even know it. It's meant for a different type of people - and I LOVE IT. I think i'd like vancouver too tho, haha. It's like a more rainy & much more beautiful sunsetty version of norcal. <3 I have a really really soft spot for magical sunsets, lol. I can't stop the romanticism sometimes, bwahahaaaa.
5. Tech Support: Holy CRAP if I had a NICKEL every time I was put on hold to figure out mundane things, I'd have 20 bucks by now. I'm STILL on hold - mind you. I've been for a while [on and off hold] because they're trying to figure out how to get my internet to work. You know, if this was the bay area - there'd be WIRELESS, and the internets would be FREE. You could just browse the wireless networks and there'd be like 5 gajillion APs. Here, OH HO HO NO - I HAVE DIAL UP + "high speed" cat5 access that has like 7k latency lag. I might as well EFFING use the dial-up - lol it's at 11k latency lag. YEAH - I was being a nerd last night and figured out how to bluetooth/network myself to the internet using my cellphone connection kinda like a verizon net-card except using my phone.
I got it to work, lol...and it runs AIM fine. I even got a chance to log into WoW - but the 11k latency was OP and I had to /log. ANDYANDAY made me log on >.<, "Come visit me Michie! I'll come find you, dahng shin!" lol haha. It's figuring out really nerdy stuff like that - that get me all warm and fired up inside. LOL? LAME huh? HEY! Bluetooth/networking broadband connection THROUGH your phone w/o CHARGING an arm and a leg is not the easiest thing to figure out if you don't have the internet's google guidance to help you. I'd elaborate on the process, but you honestly wouldn't care lol so I'm sparing you the exciting rollercoaster ride o' nerdyness. I had fun though, haha.
6. Short Term Memory Loss: Yeah I'm not sure how many of you already know this - lol, but I have slight short term memory loss. Yeah - it's not that bad, but I've had it since I was like 6 or so. Basically, I have a REALLY really strong long term memory [which is why I can remember the random little things vividly...like meeting people for the first time, the encyclopedia, theology, english and languages] but my short term "recall" function is weak. My mom had me late, /shrug? Well, that was the explaination the pediatrics dr gave me when I was like 6 or so. I didn't have any problems - except for the fact that I kinda forgot things that just happened every once in a while. SO YEAH, It's actually sort of a blessing - because It forces me to be good at taking notes and documenting things.
Haha perhaps that's the reason why I blog so frequently. Maybe I don't want to forget the happy AND sad that's happened in my life - or the myriad of other emotions along the way. :) I know I won't forget them all, lol but It does act as a helpful reminder. Anyway, in my almost 2 decades of having short term memory loss, I've tried a million different treatments to try to make it better. They knew it was short term memory loss from the start - but since there was no appropriate medicine for it, they'd try a zillion different kinds of medicine on me until they found the "right" one.
Hmm...Yeah it sounds scary, but since it's just slight short term memory loss, all my dosages were all like 5mg or 10mg at most, haha. You'd never really notice a difference ever. Anyway - NOTHING ever worked, and I always hated taking medicine for everything so I just one day stopped and started just doing the taking notes/making lists thing. I guess it helped somewhat, but -_- overall it's not fun at all when you're studying for a test that you read the chapter for like an hour ago - and you can't freaking remember any of it. Hmm, so my sophomore year of college, I went on a new pill: adderall, lol. YEAH it's meant for adhd, which I DON'T have - but i have a variation of the pill where it's only 5mg and has only enough juice to jolt the recall section of my brain. My special pill doesn't have all the other effects that a normal adderall pill has. I have little capsules and I only take a certain amount of little dot thingies in the pill. Anyway, I guess the reason why I brought it up is that - I tolerated a lot of crap before because I honestly didn't remember the details or even care to remember. Now that I remember things quite a bit easier, i've been less and less tolerant of bullshit, lol [which I guess would suck for the people who stream me bs].
For example: My dad is the epitome of the: "I care about you so I'll give you shit" type of person. I'm probably the same way, but I honestly really dislike it a lot of the time, lol. It's a really bad trait to have - because many times, it's hard to distinguish what's said for fun and what's actually meant. Sometimes I really don't have the patience to try to figure it out, either. Anyway, he streams BS to me a lot of the time - just because it's entertaining, & yada yada. I dunno, I stop caring after a while. I haven't talked to my Dad for a while lol, and I think it's because I know he's going to tell me something totally redundant and randomly give me shit about something else that I'm just avoiding the inevitable: getting frustrated for no reason. I just get picked on [or given shit to] by A LOT of people - that lately, I haven't really had the patience for. Hmm...I'm sorry? I guess? I know all your intentions aren't all ill-directed, and so I guess I'm sorry for not being as patient as I could be? I guess that's said with a question mark, because I'm really not sorry for reacting harshly. I'm sorry if I hurt anyones feelings - because that seriously wasn't my intention, I've just lost absolute tolerance of being everyone's "bitch": the sister that everyone vents to about EEEEVERYTHING that I can't do ANYTHING about, the ride that EVERYONE needs, the "spot you some cash" but never gets paid back, the "one who'll take the short straw ALL the time", the guinnea pig, the dps that everyone abuses, the healer that has to come along because frank can't go, etc etc etc. I love helping <3, but I hate it when people take advantage of the helpers. GAH! It's so annoying.
I want to be the friend that can be relied on if something happens. The friend that you can go to if you're sad/frustrated/whatever. The friend that I normally AM, except w/o tolerating the "I'll only talk to you when I need you." type of bullshit. ARGH, I get that from so many people, it's so lame and insincere. When I finally said, "I'm taking a break from WoW." You have NO idea how many "friends" stopped messaging me. LoL it's like, "OH you can't do this or that for me anymore - so you're useless. I'm not wasting my time on small talk." Guh, so lame? /shrug Stupid bloody Americans, lol.
GOD will they FUCKING fix my internet already? >.< DAMNIT.
7. Golf: There's a par5 golf course in my backyard, lol. :P It's cute. I guess the next time i visit socal <3 they all wanna go golfing for reals -_- lol?? I'll GO and try, haha but HONESTLY I haven't gone for 10ish years AND I wasn't even very good when I DID go, lol. You tend to not do so well if you're forced, I guess? And as SOON as I was old enough "not to go", I quickly "forgot" all the stuff I learned. Haha, not really - I'm just really rusty. :P I guess It'd be fun to go though? /shrug Everytime I pass by the brokaw fry's near Old Oakland, lol I say, "yayyy sj muni!" and laugh out loud. Shh, it's a secret. Golf courses? I don't know where those are? o_O
8. Eggplant Ravioli: I hate eggplant. I'm not sure what came about disliking it so much - but everything from the taste to the consistency - to even what the plant looks like IRL displeases me. Anyway, a few nights ago we went to the Disney Yacht Club; this ritzy golf/yachting club area that had a posh steakhouse. Anyway we had dinner at the steakhouse - and I REALLY for some reason didn't have the apetite for gigantic 24oz steaks, lol so I got the house "eggplant ravioli" despite KNOWING i FUCKING HATE eggplant. Anyway, to my surprise, the ravioli was absolutely divine - lol. It's probably one of the most delicious pasta dishes I've ever had - EVER. Whoo'da thunk?
9. Weather: SO yeah, everytime I've seen pictures or shows of Florida - I always see beautiful weather - sometimes rainy, but overall wonderful climate. It always seems to be in the 80's and slightly humid w/ sunshine and clear skies. YEAH BOY WAS I WRONG. LoL?? Yeah It's pretty gloomy - gray cloudy sky w/ 60~70 degree weather, rain and high humidity. YEAH Disneyland WINS the weather comparison, bwahaha.
Okay so if Norcal and the Midwest are kinda polar opposites in temperature, hmmm...then Florida would be the inbetween, I guess? /shrug I don't really quite understand it yet.
All I know is that the humidity makes my hair curl and friz like NO other. LOL MY "ASi-JEW-FRO" blasts in full technicolor. I'm temporarily a Jew because of #10 - NOT really, RELAX MOM!
10. Hook's Shnooks: Yeah - we got family reunion shirts that say "Hook's Shnooks" on the back. YES, that would INDEED be the JEW side of our family, and YES, I have a JEW side. I don't even know what a Shnook is. Damon says it's jew for Booger. Yeah great, so now i'm one of Hook's bloody boogers? GUHHHHREAT. lol
11. The Suite: I'll post pictures up later, but we got a 3 bedroom 4 FULL bathroom, two story suite. It's pretty freaking sweet. NOW - if there was INTERNET, it'd make life all the much more sweeter...not that I'm bitter or anything, but dial-up makes a dead baby cry for Jesus.
12. The Meal Plan: We have a meal plan for our week here - 3 full meals + 2 snacks a day. It's FUCKING HAX. It's on a credit card thing that we just swipe whenever we get to any restaurant-ish place.
13. Chicago Party: There is carrot cake, brownies, Uno's pizza half deepdish/half pan, bears/whitesox GALORE. LoL It's just convenient that we both have family from there, I guess. /shrug? His family likes pan thin crust pizza though, lol /shrug? Mine'll eat it, but I think they like deep dish. I'm impartial, lol? I'll have both and like them either way. It's probably because of growing up in California and not having a "well developed palette for pizza", haha. /wink
14. ESPN: There is a WHOLE park dedicated to sports fans in DisneyWorld. Haha, I'd totally go - but I'd be going w/ Jeff + Damon's Dad, lol because none of the rest of the family - except for mine [the ones that AREN'T here] give a damn.
When does that ever happen? LoL Having trouble finding a person to go to the sports section w/ you? Especially if it's a GIRL LFG, not a guy LFG, haha. LF1-4M - ESPN World of Sports - EST, lol <3. j/k
15. XM Radio: Holy GEEZ o PETE. So I've never really wanted XM radio - ever, lol but on the plane...they had such a good selection of good music, It almost made me want to invest in one. You probably wouldn't like that channel /shrug? It's like a 105.3, 104.9, & some of 94.9 put together. Like, there isn't any really ghetto music in it, but just music that has a fun beat to it. Hmm, like they might put Fergie, Justin Timberlake, and Nelly Furtado on it. :) There's a song that I really like by Gym Class Heroes [i think??? >.< I'd fucking look it up right now but I CANT OMFG]. I also like the Plain White Tee's hey there delilah song. It makes me fall in love with the lead singer, haha...like I'm Delilah and he's actually singing to me, making my heart melt, LOL. I kid you not. It's cute.
16. Gingerale: Haha OH ho ho ho gingerale...I've been binging on gingerale for a good few days now. There's something about a cup chuck full of ice w/ soda that make me glitter inside. I dunno why. I like my ice w/ some gingerale, or my ice w/ some soda - I guess?
17. Room Number: We're in room #8641. Damn, couldn't we have #1648? That would've been so nice, lol in so many ways, bwahahaha.
18. Jedi Mind Tricks/Sith Clouding: LoL okay okay, so it's probably not jedi mind tricks - and probably follows more of the sith clouding... well /shrug? i dunno. But I've been having fun w/ the tech support team. Hey I'm already grumpy that I don't have internet - so might as well mess with them a little for fun. Actually I'm not really messing with them, I'm just being myself - in Florida. I just do exactly what I'm told,
"Hi Ma'am, what seems ta' be the problem 'ere?" "Well, my internet doesn't work." "Have you plugged your computer unit into the outlet and connected the internet cable to thee wall?" "Yes." "Now I need you to turn on your computer ma'am." "Yes, I've done that already actually, entered the cmd -> ipconfigged -> renewed all existing ips -> and tried to ping google. Is there anything else you'd like me to do?" "Ohh...well yeyeah, can I put you on hold for jest one moment?" "Yup." - on hold for a good half hour - "Ma'am are ye still there?" "Yup." "Well it seems as though you don't got internet still and we gotta find a person to fix yer outlet. It's gotta be broke." "Yeah." "Okay we'll be sendin a technician up as soon as possible." "Cool, thanks." "Is your Dad or someone else helpin you there?" "Nah, I graduated from a technical college." "OH WHOOO-EEe, I was gunna say, how in the hell did you know that?" "haha" "Well Ma'am, he should be up within the hour. Thanks for yer cooperation." "np thanks."
"How in the hell?" WHO SAYS THAT - REALLY? What does that even MEAN? O_O I am in total ASSLAND, oh my God. lol <3 It makes me laugh - A LOT.
19. the Sony Memory Stick: Damon and I got in a sorta fight yesterday. The reason why it's a sorta fight is because there really wasn't any fighting involved. I pointed something out and he just had a fit and was mad at me the rest of the day. He fucking spent $85 on a gig sony memory stick. Yeah Disneyland overprices EVERYTHING by an assload...so as he was about to buy it, I looked at him, shook my head and said, "nuh uh." Anyway he ended up arguing back, "WELL we need the adapter and it'd be nice to have another memory stick ANYWAY. Who fucking cares that it's $80! Memory sticks are expensive EVERYWHERE." So I said, FINE it's YOUR money - do whatever the hell you want with it, then immediately went on New Egg on my phone and showed him the SAME fucking stick for $24. As soon as he saw it, he got grumpy and didn't talk to me for the rest of the night.
Hah yeah maybe it was a little insensitive to show him how much he was wasting, but I was just being fucking realistic. Dude if you WANT a memory stick, I'll get you one for fucking 1/3 the cost - i swear. :P I'll even gift wrap it for you for FREE. I'm sorry - i'm TRYING not to be a smart ass, but it's so hard sometimes lol.
20. Insufficiencies: I don't even really know if that's a WORD or not, lol...but it IS NOW, DAMNIT. So yeah, the near hairless 104lbs of me does NOT like to be cold or hungry. I like cold weather...just I like being prepared for it - in the right clothing. So yesterday was about 65, humid, and very breezy - so it felt like 58~60. I was in shorts and a teeshirt...and FREEEZING my ass off. Everyone else was in comparable gear, lol...but they have much more flubber+hair than I do apparently, because the miniscule amounts of hair on my arms were ALL hitler saluting and it was NOT helping at all. Haha...i'm in Florida w/ a knit woolen sweater on and jeans. Doesn't that just sound WRONG? lol...OH AND THE CURLY HAIR GOD -_- the curly hair. QQ
I'm hungry lol, I think i'm going to call room service and have them deliver foods. :) /wave
***
Edit at 2:43pm: The broadband works. O_O DAMN took long enough. Anyone wanna instance? haha <3
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Monday, October 22, 2007-) +9:32 PM]*
xoxo~
HAHA i JUST finished my dinner. Damon picked up PandaXpress.
So i wait until i finish as much as I can before I open my fortune...so yeah I just opened my fortune and it said, "The sun will shine through your heart and warm your soul."
Haha <3 I hope it tans it in the process. :P
LOL It just makes me laugh because it's kinda exactly what I needed to hear.
I like people that warm my soul, lol. Haha...and I like warming peoples souls too.
OH I WISH i could elaborate on that one - but everytime I type it out, LOL it makes me hysterically laugh and not take any of it seriously.
Haha here's a hint: theoretically, holy conquers shadow. LOL
***
On another note: convo w/ osakars today...the italics are in WoW and the bold was aim inbetween gtalk...
Osaka: miiiichie, whatcha doing? are still feelin down? me: yeah -_- kinda i thought my video card was fixed and it's not -_- damn I'd tell frank to get on WoW to get the Halloween paladin helm if i wasn't so upset at the situation lol Osaka: lol Osaka: still grumpy? me: i deleted him from gtalk Osaka: for ditching ony * Luzzil: that was pretty fucked up just to ditch over a sarcastic comment Michie: he probably didn't wanna go w/e -_- it's okay Luzzil: maybe he forgot that you went to a computer school with him Luzzil: and thought he needed to explain how to look up stuff Luzzil: like you wouldnt know Michie: Thanks Osaka, so now i'm not only the one who's "earned the right to be ignored", but the town idiot as well. Luzzil: lmao Luzzil: no guys are just slow and overly sensitive sometimes Michie: -_- man. Luzzil: or they think too much but in the wrong directions Michie: I guess * me: and wouldn't answer josh either Osaka: haha me: when he called me: well it's not just that it makes me miss gegsn like 10x more when frank acts like that * Luzzil: whaaaaa? Michie: I dunno...paladins are supposed to be all righteous defending and overly compassionate. Luzzil: yeah hes more like a warlock sometimes Luzzil: you guys should trade Michie: hah, im not a paladin. Luzzil: holy lock? Luzzil: ohhh you're a shockadin Michie: XD stopit * Osaka: why are you mad at josh? me: I'm not. -_- josh is frank's wingman Osaka: the wingman? me: he'll try to convince me not to be upset at him and im just sick of being the boob that always gets squished in the corset Osaka: lmao i can tell you're getting weary of the game without the no moo crew :( i've barely been playing at all these days me: haha it's okay maybe i need a break it's probably for the best * hyperfluffybunny: don't let him get to you hellokuty16: haha :P sure? hyperfluffybunny: fufies even playing more because hes scared youre gonna stop hellokuty16: awww *_* hyperfluffybunny: and your dahng shin andy keeps asking me what this "secret" is that only me and fuf know hyperfluffybunny: i think he thinks you like him hellokuty16: LOL? Well I do?? hyperfluffybunny: nono I think he thinks the secret is that you like him like him like dahng shin for real hyperfluffybunny: not that youre quitting WoW hellokuty16: OH hahahahahaa >.< hyperfluffybunny: its cute cuz hes so happy hellokuty16: LOL?! Did Justin tell you what happened at Blockbuster? hyperfluffybunny: no? hellokuty16: We were hiding in the parking lot waiting @ blockbuster for AndyAnday to show up - lol...and when he got there in his freaking bmw328ballermobile fashionably late, I called him on his cell to ask, "hey dahng shin, where are you??" hyperfluffybunny: LMAO hyperfluffybunny: did he apologize for being late? hellokuty16: LOL HE RAN [WHILE ON THE PHONE] FOREST GUMP RAN - to blockbuster from his car, and was apologizing like a madman. >.< hyperfluffybunny: LMAO!! hellokuty16: awwww XD hellokuty16: fufiface kept teasing him the whole time, "I need freedom." LOLOL * Osaka: yeah... i think everyone needs to take a vacation from wow Osaka: we'll convince sho to play dota so we can trash talk him me: lol yeah :D Osaka: :) maybe reeeeki too i think i have enough money to buy wc3 :) or we could play d2 together or whatever me: :D ^_^ i'd like that haha it'd be fun Osaka: :) i don't have that either though >.< i only have starcraft like a true korean :P me: lol hahaha
<3 that's why i love them. -_-
<3 carpe diem <3
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lol...they messaged me to watch it. "zomg japanese is so cooooooool..."
Yeah they still message me every so often. It's kinda cute, I guess.
<3 carpe diem <3
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+7:07 PM]*
xoxo~
LoL, I'm just laughing at my misery.
I hope this trip is fun. -_- I hate flying.
***
I looked at Damon with the "*_* please fix my computer" eyes and he laughed.
"I don't know how to fix it?! You would know better than I would."
GOD DAMNIT. CAN'T ONE THING IN MY LIFE JUST HAPPEN EASY? JESUS CHRIST. -_- GOD DAMNIT. I'm FUCKING complaining here because everyone thinks things come so goddamn easily to me. NOTHING DOES - I WORK HARD FOR IT...and when I don't - OBVIOUSLY NOTHING happens. I DON'T GET SHIT easily - and PEOPLE in NORCAL REMIND ME constantly that things SHOULDN'T COME EASILY. Yeah I get it, WHATEVER.
I think that's why I dislike it here so much. I'm FUCKING SURROUNDED BY OVERSENSITIVE GUYS THAT WANT TO GIVE ME A HARD TIME. WTF IS UP WITH THAT SHIT!? Yeah at this point, my dad would be hysterrically laughing and we'd get in a "real" fight. It's EVERYONE - LITERALLY EVERYONE HERE. DUDE and you can EVEN add fucking "Saw 4" to the pile - b/c he STILL wants to move up here despite the cold shoulder.
That was the exact reason why Koichi and I didn't work out. He gave me shit over EVERYTHING like a fucking COMBAT spec rogue that duel wielded and fucking thistle tea'd up the ass. HE FEEDS OFF OF MY MISERY. Hmm like his line was, "Okay, Ass." and I'd always respond, "What..? Why am I an ass this time...?" then he'd just /shrug meh and FEED off of my curiosity. I'd proceed to ask him - and he'd just keep /shrugging and pushing me away - which then led to me either "FINE, DON'T TELL ME." or ignoring him. Then that would lead to him trying to make amends by, "Hey so what happened in Nibelheim after you got to the shin-ra mansion? I was thinking about it earlier...and couldn't remember."
NO YOU DICK, I'M NOT your fucking punching bag yo-yo thing. LoL, I guess I can be mean too. I could've been nice and warned him that I was going to drop his ass like a fucking rotten piece of meat if he kept at it - lol.
DUDE Misery is funny as LONG as no one is getting hurt in the process. -_-
JESUS.
You know that Staples commercial w/ the "Easy" button? Yeah I want that. -_- Seriously I'm not trying to be spoiled - it's far from that. I just want someone to fucking fix it for me for ONCE. JUST FUCKING SWEEP ME OFF MY FUCKING FEET W/ YOUR FUCKING MIND BULLETS AND FUCKING FIX THIS GODDAMN FUCKING COMPUTER.
Was it TOO much to ask, God - to have a paladin that can fix my computer and a gentleman AT THE SAME TIME??? -_- WAS IT TOO MUCH TO ASK?!! I have NO idea what the fuck I did in my previous life, but i sincerely apologize for the possible actions...because I AM SERIOUSLY getting slapped by the karma stick.
Maybe my previous life was extremely lucky - and this life had to be extremely unlucky to balance it all out. /shrug? lol
Lol maybe i'll have enough negatives to neutralize the negativity. YAY FOR ALLITERATION!
nVidia, just RELEASE my GODDAMN FREAKING DRIVERS PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE AND I CAN FIX IT MYSELF and i don't have to freaking rely on anyone elseeeeeeeeeejeeeezzuuuuzz -_- /cry
okay i gotta get packing. -_-
I FUCKING HATE FLYING.
<3 carpe diem <3
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+12:38 PM]*
xoxo~
haha my dahng shin anday gave me this present:
<3 carpe diem <3
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+1:13 AM]*
xoxo~
Nov 1 - the account ends. I don't think I'm coming back for a while. I think it's for the best anyway.
I'm probably going to end up buying gold to pay back Andy.
Haha, I even tried to shard all my old blues + old purples but I didn't have the heart to. There were just way too many good memories to just DE them and sell the shards.
I'll be up to it one day, haha...just not right now. :)
So why for the gigantic change? Hmm...because it's spontaneous and whimsical.
I kinda want to take a break from video games. /shrug?
I'll be a boring girl. Lets try it out. /wink ;)
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Sunday, October 21, 2007-) +10:44 PM]*
xoxo~
phewwww that actually felt like 10x better. I honestly don't remember the last time I really really cried.
OH yeah, when my friend passed away...yeah like 6 months or so ago.
So here...Osaka, proof that I do cry. It's doesn't happen very often - but when It happens...it's painful, hahaha that's retarded -_-.
Yeah Osaka's pretty pissed off at Frank. He asked me if I wanted him to try Ony with me - so it wouldn't be a wasted effort going all the way over there and spending 100g on respecs + pots/etc. I told him not to be upset @ Frank. It was just a miscommunication like always and that maybe it's a hint to take an extended vacation from WoW + Frank & Josh.
It made me really cry -_- not because of not going...but because it's instances like that where I really REALLY miss Gegsn & Riki. >.< Fuf's not playing all that much anymore either -_- and it breaks my heart. I really don't care much about the game inasmuch michies molesters. I'd honestly delete michie in a heartbeat if it meant they could live nearby.
Frank's messaging me something stupid in gtalk. -_- I had to delete him because it was frustrating me. I'd block him, but that would require me to re-add him to my list. Nope.
Yeah, I reinstalled all my drivers and worked on my computer the whole day [after the computer blue screened repeatedly] JUST TO MAKE SURE I could sign on for Ony since he said we'd go after work. Then, he made me wait around...because he had some stuff in WoW to do and that he got into underbog @ 10. After the wasted evening, I traveled all the way to dustwallow marsh to find out he's been fucking /afk for 20 minutes - then I say ONE smart ass comment and he takes that as his "way out" and ninja signs off.
I'm a goddamn doormat to him. So, I'm going to stop.
Yeah there was no, "You know...I'm really tired and I do have work tomorrow...do you mind if we do this some other day?" or "Yeah I'm really sorry I had you waiting - I didn't expect the instance to be that long...can I take a raincheck on the Ony run?"
Fuck the fact that I'm leaving in 2 days and cancelled most of my day [w/ my cousins who left] to prepare for this FUCKING run because my computer wasn't working. "Yeah you didn't have to." YEAH I KNOW I DON'T HAVE TO - I'm NOT A FLAKE. I said I'd be there, so I prepared diligently like a good fucking girl. Yeah, one of those good girls that always get taken advantage of.
It makes me wish oh so very much that I WAS that MEAN girl that intentionally broke boys' HEARTS for FUN. It just makes me bitter and resentful that I have this fucking stupid ass need to be compassionate EVEN if i'm getting the goddamn door slammed in my face. I don't even KNOW how to be mean even if i TRIED. LoL The best I can do is confront people with the wtf? line...which I usually never get an answer to - or if I do, it's some asshole comeback.
I messaged Frank:
me: So you asked me to wait for you...while you did UB and other stuff when i COULD've been raiding ssc and as soon as you get some lip from me you're going to ninjaleave? oh yeah - but you HAVE to do it as soon as i get to dustwallow me: you should really take up that raiding offer and head back to mug'thol me: i dunno why you even stay on my server
I was being serious. I wasn't even being a smartass this time, lol. If he's not having fun playing with me - he shouldn't force himself to. It really isn't that big of a deal if he doesn't want play. I HATE fucking forcing people to hang out. It frustrates the shit out of me. Hmm... -_- I'm going to keep this thought to myself.
Well shit, can you blame me for being upset? Damn, I didn't even get a fucking text after i had spam texted him with info from people who have done it. I wanted to do something challenging that was just as exciting for the other person as it was for me. Jesus, if he didn't feel like doing it -_- he could've just said he didn't wanna go. I'd understand. He's probably ran that instance fucking 50 million times. It's fine. YEAH old news I get it.
There's just something exciting about 2manning a 40 person lvl 60 bossfight to me. AND WTF WHEN THE HELL DO I EVER GET TO TANK ANYTHING FOR REALS?! -_- GOD.
It's not about fucking two manning Ony w/ a paladin. Guh -_- If i wanted to just go with a paladin, I could've went with any fucking paladin in my fucking paladin populated buddylist. It was about 2 manning a near impossible instance w/ myy special paladin before having to take a plane ride to the other side of the states.
I've regretted so many things lately. Hah, yeah coming from the girl that doesn't regret anything. I wish I fucking had the balls and moved away when I had the chance.
So yeah, in the end that hurt a lot -_- and I don't usually stay close to boys that make me cry. I think Koichi was the only one who I sort of keep in touch with [once a fucking year]. Haha...but i didn't talk to him for a good two years after. So if that was your goal, to make me really sad and push me away - you win. I'll leave you alone forever...dude you can even HAVE my server - I'll do the honors and leave.
<3 carpe diem <3
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+9:53 PM]*
xoxo~
-_- my cousins went home, my computer is being a fucking douche, and i'm sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo tired of flakes i could startup a whole head&shoulders line for PEOPLE.
Hm I know it's just because i'm really pissed off right now - but I dunno if I want to be friends w/ Josh & Frank anymore. -_- I'm sick of being fucking kicked in the face like a rabid dog. I always tolerate the bullshit because I'm an IDIOT. I'm tired of tolerating the crap.
I had a really bad day so I'm going to go curl up in a ball and cry like a FUCKING GIRL.
<3 carpe diem <3
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+3:34 PM]*
xoxo~
POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP >.>
I'm so easily dissatisfied w/ computer issues. Hm...like, my computer can run "fine" w/ its current settings - but "fine" isn't good enough for me...and I have to find a solution even though I know there isn't one.
Hmm
So basically the hardware manufacturers of my 2 nvidia geforce9700gs sli cards have updated drivers that were JUST RELEASED. Alienware AND nvidia don't have them unfortunately AND you can't download them from the hardware manufacturer's website either because they're greedy bitches.
God I'm annoyed.
So now it's back to square 1...and the fucking super fluctuating framerates, DAMNIT?!
I HATE having SLI and not being able to use its full potential. FUCKING HALF LIFE looks WONDERFUL on this fucking computer but do I EVEN FUCKING CARE? GODDDDDD! >.< WHY can't WoW just WORK WELL, JESUS CHRIST?!
IT's like being in bg's and defending a flag w/ a FREAKING RET paladin who DOESN'T HEAL. IS IT TOO MUCH TO ASK A PALADIN TO HEAL!?! DAMNITTTTT.
PHEW im feeling better already. >.> Maybe I'll troll some forums in hopes for a better sli solution. QQ
/wave
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Saturday, October 20, 2007-) +11:12 AM]*
xoxo~
I'm back from SoCal and I'm finishing up yesterday's post before I have to leave again for my Aunt's bday Party.
I love norcal - it's my home. I love everything about it here. Even the things I dislike - it isn't really so bad...I'm just spoiled by growing up in the Bay Area and have higher expectations for everything.
Yeah that was really generalized and vague - but I don't really like posting specifics because I might unintentionally hurt someone's feelings. I'm good at that, unfortunately: being exceptionally "cold-hearted" and blunt on accident - totally oblivious to the person's feelings.
I'm workin' on it.
Jesus this post is taking longer than expected - I guess I'll have to post my trip after the party. >.> Mann...
Lots of my posts come from the rational thinking portion of my brain which is fast and direct...but sometimes, when I have to figure out how to make whatever I'm thinking come out "nicely"...so i don't offend anyone, it takes FUCKING forever.
I hate English - it's fucking bullshit. The words are too vague. In Japanese, I could say a sentence to you and fucking it mean EXACTLY what I said. NO - in American ENGLISH, I could say it in a certain tonality and it come off totally fucking rude. It's fucking amazing. I wish we could all speak in a numerical sense...where there is ALWAYS a correct answer sometimes. Yeah - it takes away the color and spice of life, but it's accurate. There's no fucking room for elaboration or exaggeration.
LOL i just contradicted my whole personality - hahahaha...lol<3 I'm telling you, when i'm pmsing - haha I'm so anal retentive and fucking left brained it's not even funny. Then as soon as i'm not-pmsing, lol back to dominant right brained thinking I go. /shrug <3
okay i REALLY gg. Adios!
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Friday, October 19, 2007-) +1:39 PM]*
xoxo~
I'm going hoooooooooome <3.
It's bittersweet. I miss home, but I'm going to also miss everyone over here. They go to Pomona/Fullerton/UCI...and are normal. Okay they're not "Normal", they're dorky/nerdy like me - but they know how to socialize. I guess I miss that. 99.9% of my Cogswell friends are like that. I <3 them to bits, but I'm not from that background...i had a batcave - I DID [like everyone else]...the difference was, I BARELY WAS IN IT.
Out of all my friends - I'd have to go to Oktoberfest with like... hs people because it'd just be WEIRD to go with Cogswell folks. /shrug, I dunno. Oktoberfest is for normal people talk time. Yeah I KNOW, "Who's to say what's considered 'normal'...and who really even GIVES a DAMN if we talk about just gaming stuff? or 'nerdy' stuff?"
You're welcome to talk about whatever the heck you'd like to talk about - absolutely whatever makes you happy. Being around primarily one dimensional people ALL the time make me scurvy and need a break from it. I can't do it for that long before I get bored of life.
There's more to life than just games. Games are a HUGE part of my life - trust me. I majored in this shit, i love it. It's just that many of the topics I talk to with my cogswell friends make me feel like - Wow...that is SO insignificant - in a different way. Like, w/ HS friends convos make me bored because i don't honestly give a damn what "that girl" or "that guy" does in his free time now. Hmm, w/ cogswell folks...it's like the same arguments/conversations about frame rates and the "NEW BREAKTHROUGH FPS!". It's not bad - both of the conversations with those different groups are interesting - they also can get old if you're around it too much, i guess.
Sometimes, I just want someone to say, "So I found this Brazillian restaurant like 50 miles away...and it seems pretty good. Wanna try it out?" or... "I like school...and learning. I like taking HU electives just because multiculturalism is interesting." or something unique like that.
DAMN.
That's when I come to socal - and it's like EVERYTHING in a nutshell. They're academically smart, socially not retarded, well cultured, adventurous all around gamers.
DAMN.
WHY? -_- WHY ARE THEY ALL DOWN HERE? DAMN. DAMN.
I went Geo-caching w/ Justin & AndyAnday while I was down there. WHO DOES THAT? WHO WANTS to trek around and hike. GOD ONLY WEIRDOS and FUCKING HIPPIES do that around Cogswell. All my friends who LIKED exploring moved away. I did a little exploring w/ Amadeus & that group of friends...a while back, and that was fun. I was just over the whole "getting high is cool" thing - it wasn't my thing.
Oktoberfest with the WHOLE group. JESUS CHRIST - now THAT is what fucking hanging out with friends & drinking is SUPPOSED to be like. OH man. >.>
ONLY STEVE got plastered the WHOLE time there. WHY? Because - EVERYONE else was too busy having fun - doing the chicken dance and fucking tasting beers/getting to know each other.
i gg help get the car. we're leaving in a bit, adios!
<3 carpe diem <3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(Thursday, October 11, 2007-) +11:36 AM]*
xoxo~
I wish I could do a crazy native american harvest dance and instead of it growing/sprouting plants all over the place - my hair would magically grow back, lol.
LOL i was just randomly thinking about that this morning as I was taming the mane.
Now Playing: Thnx fr th mmrs - Fall out Boy
So yeah, I've JUST found the "chat log" tab in gtalk. LOL I used to always copy/paste "important" conversations and save them into notepad documents hidden in my computer somewhere.
LOL<3
It made me happy. LOL Like - genuinely happy; not just satisfied. It was just something really nice to find to end a pretty shitty day. :)
I always used to think that Frank was pretty mean every once in a while and hated my guts. OH if i copy/pasted some convos - you'd think so too.
Haha, okay so - looking at all the convos I've had with EVERYONE - i've had the most convos w/ "Frankasaurus"...lol, since 2006. AAAAAAND despite our random super arguments - we'd have really funny convos too.
Overall, lol Frank did have some pretty MEAN moments...but I've had quite a bit of coldhearted-ness back too. LOL >.> I've just never noticed it because it was a reaction to the moment - something he's said or done...and i've just responded coldly or smart-assy. I've always reacted in that way - because I felt like he could handle it...lol, that he was similar enough that he'd just say something equally as sarcastic/smart ass and brush it off.
Some things were PRETTY mean though - lols and I felt needed an apology. So I gave him one this morning, lol.
SOMETIMES, the whole differentiating emotional-rational thinking was really really hard, haha. I'd have my emotional moments and blast them at him.
DUDE. HE stopped raiding and came to my server before I got to 60. DO YOU HAVE ANY idea how "zomg <3_<3 paladin in t2... i wanna shadowmeld the best a gnome can - by hiding in the bushes and /sleep-ing" I felt? LOL It was like the cutest thing - EVER. I don't DO cute stuff well. It was one of those few glowing happy days ever. Then, we had an IRL argument about something stupid and he switched back to his old server and stopped playing WoW. OKAY, OWW?? It's like - the rational thinking didn't WANNA work. It went on hiatus and the emotional girl thinking just fucking took over the shop.
Haha, i know, "you're such a girl."
HEY. It's not often that a little casual playing not even 60 yet gnome warlock gets a fully t2'ed paladin from a different server to drop everything and come over.
Yeah I know, Josh was on my server too - and he had IRL friends he could play with. It wasn't just me :D, but still...It would take people really special to me for me to take a character that i've spent THAT much time on - on a server w/ friends I've grown to know really well, and just switch over to hang out w/ IRL friends who weren't even CLOSE to the progression that i was at. I was fucking 50 when he came over AND josh wasn't even freaking 30 yet.
Some things still don't make sense - lol and it's okay I guess. In time, i'll figure it out. :P I'm happy with the information i've acquired so far.
Why wouldn't you let me sleep with Rachael? I don't think we were doing anything bad.../shrug lol? -_-
And what could you have possibly said to Allyn to strike the fear of God in him? o_o
And why can't you pick up sometimes if it's me?
AND "they haven't earned the right to be ignored yet." What the hell is that supposed to mean? lol
lol lol AND WHY on GODS GREEN EARTH would you EVER LEAVE a Wii line to help with an epic mount quest? >.< Haha - i have convos w/ osaka too. "OMGOMGOMG he just left the wii line...and he's going to help me get my mount! >.< I tried to stop him QQ. I'm downloading google earth right now."
LOL That was funny. I had such horrible latency...i was in monterey for thanksgiving, and leeching internet off of a weak signal. I kept dcing and had these super horrible lag spikes...-_- totally useless, lol. I felt so bad for them! -_- AWWW<3
I don't wanna keep reading old chats - it makes me all giggly and girly. YUCK! LOL<3
okay back to making cookies /wave <3
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Wednesday, October 10, 2007-) +7:39 PM]*
xoxo~
LOL!
Sarcasm. That was another thing that my new best friends know about me that my older best friends didn't. I had my sarcastic "moments" before [I would call them outbursts] and my friends didn't like it. They scolded me, lol. I had to TRYYY and smother the smart ass remarks. OH I THOUGHT them all the time - just not always out loud.
LOL I was going to find an example lol w/ Osaka, but I found something better.
michie: lol yeah of course :P frank is too >.< am I sharing a room with him? Osaka: sweet! michie: -_- lol Osaka: oh lol not the room thing lmao michie: because if fufe and andy stay downstairs Osaka: uhm, he can sleep downstairs? michie: ? Osaka: frank can sleep with me oh bebe michie: LOL michie: im just bringing a sleeping bag so he stays out of my haruhi space LoL Osaka: you're letting him sleep in the big comfy bed? michie: hell no?! well it's only for 2 nights right? hmm we can share, i guess? but there has to be a divider LOL AND he has to scoot all the way to the wall Osaka: lmao michie: haha Osaka: i dun have a divider other than JJ's prison pen thing michie: LOL nono i'll bring pillows :D i'll make a little fort thing and your turtle stuffed animal can help Osaka: lol you sound like a 5 year old michie: LOL haha WELLL!?!?! that's how im picturing BUNKING WITH HIM haha i can't picture it like a 23 year old that's just WRONG lol Osaka: lmao, i'm getting images of calvin and hobbes michie: lol Osaka: you're calvin and frank is the girl he picks on michie: XD hahaha i think he thinks he's calvin LOL Osaka: nah michie: he even has a calvin and hobbes picture on his gtalk Osaka: his personality is too sarcastic! he's more like hobbes well i dono you can be susie he could be calvin michie: LOL i am NOT susie Osaka: lol michie: hahahaha Osaka: susie could be mean too she stole hobbes from calvin and stuff michie: that's true :P Osaka: but she just wants to get along but calvin is too much of a dick :P so she becomes a dick too michie: lol Osaka: your new nickname michie: haha Osaka: susie Osaka: susiemiya haruhi michie: /gasp!!!! LOLOL Osaka: :P michie: XD Osaka: oooo it's such a good comic! michie: i know :P i've read it for a while lol! i like it too but i never EVEN thought about it relating to this stuff lol Osaka: lol michie: hahaha oh man -_- Osaka: hm? michie: lol Osaka: :D i only have one michie: XD really? Osaka: ya when i was a kid i would color in it too it was like my favorite book ever michie: haha XD i remember coloring them too because it was just black and white sometimes i think Osaka: ya michie: qq Osaka: =/ michie: LOL i remember that >.< hahahaha calvin was a star wars fan lol Osaka: he was!?! michie: yeah i can't remember when but i remember that he was lol Osaka: :) Osaka: booyaka lolol poor susie michie: LOLOL <3333 OMG SHE HAD A RABBIT LOLOL i TOTALLY FORGOT >.< hahahahahahaaa!!! LOL Osaka: :D she's totally you and frank! michie: omg -_- hahaha Osaka: lmao mr. bun! nooooooooooooOOOOoo michie: lol osaka do you remember my bunny? Osaka: ya he took the whole ride with you he's a little trooper :P michie: lol well I wasn't about to drive alone! >.< it's a long drive Osaka: aw thats cute me: XD Osaka: lmao his dad is awesome he makes up so much BS i wanna be like him michie: lol Osaka: calvin on girls michie: LOL oh god i love her hahahaha Osaka: haha guys are silly big kids michie: XD haha yeah :P Osaka: thats alright though growing up is overrated! michie: XD ...but change is wonderful Osaka: lol calvin is so mean michie: yeah he's a dick lol Osaka: suzie's kinda mean too michie: lol yeah Osaka: but in a smarter way michie: omg lol i miss this comic
HAHAHAHAALOLOLHAHAHAAHA /gasp LOLOLAHAHAHA
LOL HAHA i can't get back to the topic because I keep finding funny quotes from conversations w/ osaka...lol
michie: I just wanna tell him,"sometimes i think i do understand, then you throw a fucking grenade at me...and blow me up. and i'm like WTF how did you even GET a grenade?" Osaka: lmao goblin engineering michie: He says we're friends lol im so lost Osaka: wha? michie: "we are friends...you just seem to blow things out of proportion cause you think i need to be able to talk to you 24/7...well guess what i need my space...if you don't like it then oh well" LOL Osaka: guys are extremely stubborn about change michie: ugh -_- Osaka: sorry michie thats the way we are i really don't think he hates you he just sounds pretty lazy like me michie: :( "im fine with hanging out on saturdays and in wow...what else do you want?" OSAKA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it has NOTHING to do with what i want i'm trying to fucking figure out what he wants >.< UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH LIKE CHOOSE ONE FRIENDS / NOT FRIENDS MAD / HAPPY <3 / OMFG JESUS CHRIST Osaka: lmao my siiiiide he's trying to just be a friend i think michie: by being a complete asshole? wow that's a GREAT idea i wish i thought of that one Osaka: lmao he doesn't seem like he wants to do anything Osaka: he's probably close to you michie: he's probably an idiot. Osaka: but he won't show it like you won't don't ask me why michie: -_- why lol <3 haha Osaka: probably because you guys can't? michie: oh O_O lol Osaka: lmao you loser
okay now back to the topic...lol
FUCK, i CAN'T FIND the fucking osaka convo w/ a million analogies. "Trying to play 'nice' with him is like asking a blind person to describe the color purple to you - vividly."
ARGH THAT ONE...!!! >.> WHERE IS IT!?!
SEE this is one thing that annoys me about trillian pro. Whenever I used trill for gtalk, -_- my conversations didn't all get recorded and/or the ones that did had lines missing.
Gah w/e. The point is - my current good friends know that side of me also, lol. <3
<3 carpe diem <3
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+5:56 PM]*
xoxo~
Got my teeth whitened @ the dentists' and got new retainers - from the dentists' too. Kinda makes me wish that I had thought ahead and just got the stupid whitening system from my dentist - so i could've had the whitening retainer + the whitening stuff all in one.
Yeah i know - the retainers work differently - but still.
They did the zoom bleaching stuff today - with the uv thing. My teeth are really sensitive and my gums are sorta irritated.
SO yeah my teeth are definitely whiter - but i'm not sure the pain afterwards and irritations were worth the whole whitening altogether. /shrug
My teeth weren't really that stained to begin with.
Whatever? /shrug.
I had a really long day and I'm just irritated all around. It doesn't help that my gums are irritating me also. ARGH.
I wanna snuggle something soft and that smells good QQ and watch transformers. LOL Don't ask. I'm afraid to indulge myself w/ ice cream. I know it's going to hurt like a bizznatch.
Okay adios.
<3 carpe diem <3
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+11:08 AM]*
xoxo~
Now Playing: Here in Your Arms - Hellogoodbye
I took a picture for Jo. She wanted to see what the real "Teeny" looks like now. She likes me better w/o makeup. I think she's blind, lol. YOU CAN SEE PIMPLIES AND MY FRECKLES, YUCK!? YEAH what kind of asian has freaking freckles? That's so horrible, lol. It's not as bad now - haha they're really small, but they used to be way bigger :D.
Yeah my non-asian skin and my wavy hair are like the ONLY attributes i inherited from my "CHINESE" looking non-asian mom. LOL
OH ho ho ho JO...things have changed SO much. Hurry home, i miss you<3! There aren't enough non-nerdy people in my life sometimes. All the current people in my life don't even like sports - except for Frank and Kevin. It's NUTS?
Yeah you would freak the fuck out. I'm so sports-normal-people deprived, I almost resorted to fucking calling Jason LaRose. I wonder how he's doing nowadays? >.<
Haha and the 2 people that DO appreciate baseball - Kevin + Frank, oh that's a thing in itself. Frank fucking hates anything to do with Barry Bonds because of the whole steroids thing...which is kind of noob, whatever. lol And Kevin is really impartial to everything - he doesn't really have a favorite - anything. He likes the A's the most, but he's into the Giants and every other team kind of similarly. Conflict is kinda fun though? /shrug iono.
Like how Allan & Jerome were an A's fans and we were Giants fans...or rushing home to watch games with Jerome after school. Orrrrrr watching niners games and then /crying on how bad they're sucking with our friends. -_- EVEN warriors/kings games with all of you guys....or Sharks games, wtf?? -____- OH MANN. I'm not even that big of a hockey fan at ALL - but JESUS.
AHHHH People don't DO that here! It's NUTS! >.> MY GOD - i don't even know if Stephanie knows who Magic Johnson is and/or what happened to him. Not that she HAS to know - or that it makes her any less/more cool if she does, but JESUS JESUS!! She hasn't even seen Star Wars...ANY OF THEM. ARGH i'm so deprived.
Oh my mother doesn't make sense some times. -_- GUOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDD.
Wtf is with this bank of america account shit? -_- "check your bank of america booklet."
WHAT THE FUCK bank of america booklet? I don't even have a bank of america account? What the heck are you talking about? O_O OH JEEZ. Are you talking about the world savings account?
then she says..."oh no don't worry we'll find it. i have one at home."
WHAT THE FUCK FIND WHAT? What the hell? What the hell are you talking about? -_- What the hell just happened?
-_- i was asking for my world savings FREAKING booklet so i could transfer my FREAKING funds - and now she's talking about bank of america.
"Maybe you have the bank of america booklet in your car."
OKAY WHAT THE HELL BANK OF AMERICA booklet are you even TALKING about - and #2, I just got a brand new car. WHY THE HELL would i put a bank of america booklet IN the fucking car? That's like asking for trouble. And what the hell kind of booklet is this?
What's going on? O_O?! GOD DAMNIT.
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Tuesday, October 09, 2007-) +7:06 PM]*
xoxo~
I'm the overly-compassionate Mom of the group that gives out moral advice yet never does anything really to make myself happy.
It's never going to change - I'm just THAT person.
One of my best friends Joanne went through a tough time in her life. I'm not elaborating because it's not my place to say, but she ended up joining the Navy and moving thousands of miles away to Norfolk, Virginia.
YEAH so the whole thing about - dude you have NO idea, all my best friends left me. I was being absolutely serious.
Anyway, she asked me a question:
How many times have you ever wondered about the things that people tell you? I mean, really wondered. For instance, a friend of yours tells you a funny/sad/angry story. Have you ever wondered if it was told differently before and whether or not the version you heard is the absolute true one? Well, today was definitely one of those days for me. The question I was wondering was, "how many times have those words been said before they were said to me?"
So let's say someone told you something that made you really happy. Does the value of those words deminish because you aren't the first person to hear them?
So I responded:
I don't think we should put a diminishing value on anything that makes us happy. Yeah, so what - you could possibly not be the first person who was told the story, but ultimately you were told the story anyway - so even if you weren't the first, you were still important enough be told it. That's something.
For example, the words I love you - lol, just because you weren't the first girlfriend of this person doesn't mean that the value of its meaning has diminished. Just because Damon wasn't the first guy I fell in love with doesn't mean the words have lost their power.
Then she responded:
thanks for the advice, lady. my current boyfriend told me somethin a long time ago that i thought was really cute. it wasn't "i love you" like my blog might suggest. for lack of better words, the best way i can describe it, it was a really cute "line." well, last night, i found out he said that EXACT same line to a girl he dated a few months before he and i started dating. it kind of hurt my feelings, because of not only the obvious reason, but also because i was by myself with no one here to stop the gears in my head from spinning.
anyway, thank you so much for the advice...i really appreciate it.
on a lighter note, how are you doing? i remember all those days we cut school to go to silver creek. did i ever thank you for sacrificing your education to go galavant with me? lol...thanks! =)
i should be back in the bay around the end of the year. it'll be after xmas and through new year's, and since i'm giving you plenty of advance notice, i hope to see you! please say it will be possible... =P
lots of love, Jo
And my response:
Jo, lol i am ALWAYS here for ya even in spirit cause you just have to be 50 million light years away. You don't have to thank me for anything. If anything, I should be thanking you for being a genuinely great friend.
Don't be too mad at your boyfriend. :P The words still do count - even though he reuses them. Not everyone is that creative with words and are forced to reuse them. BOYS SUCK! Haha...<3 He still likes ya enough to say it - that's what counts.
Yeah I'm working my getting my masters in business right now - so I'll be in the area [semi-free] for a fairly LONG time >.< unfortunately, haha. Call me whenever you need a shoulder or if you just need a girl to chat with.
Miss ya and take care of yourself! -Christine
Guh it makes me all teary and welled up inside. -_- It was just Liliana's birthday and I couldn't even see her - she's in Europe. I just talked to Alani on the phone over the weekend and she's inbetween Denver & SLO. Jeromey's in fucking SoCAL going to Pomona and even the evil dickhead himself is in SoCal going to riverside. -_-
It all sucks. They bring the glow-y side out of me...and what's weird is that I'm the Mama. NO ONE would ever know that nowadays. They always come to me with their stuff and I FIX it :( - that's my job.
I'm like the only plate wearing, healing, fearing, holy/shadow lockadin you'll ever find - EVER.
I gave up a possible boyfriend for Jo once. They ended up together for 4 years. Hmm lol, now that I think about it - I gave one up for Liliana too...that one didn't work out. Ummm, I gave up 5 guys for Alani throughout the years. Jesus Christ?? Ben, Hunter, Rudy [don't ask...that was a complicated one, because i didn't like him like THAAAAT], Robert, Koichi...i feel like I'm missing one. LOL OH hahaha...that's right I remember - yeahhhhh no.
WELL?! What the hell was I supposed to do about that? YEAH EXACTLY - NOTHING.
Now some people would totally think badly of that...and scold me for "giving up" all those chances.
It HONESTLY wasn't a big deal to me at the time - because in WoW terminology, none of them except for 1 was epic-grade. So /shrug? It made deciding who to pursue - easier. LoL yeah I did give up Koichi at one point for Alani. Haha, that didn't work out quite so well - and he was pretty upset about it. Almost as if I "gave up" on him. I didn't give up on him, I gave up on our young relationship. /shrug
He honestly needed to rep up w/ other factions. LOL :P I was the hydraxian waterlords and no one was wanting to run MC anymore. There wasn't a chance to rep up with them, lol.
Haha XD I don't think I'm ever going to take that subject seriously. It just doesn't deserve my undivided attention, lol.
ANYWAY back to the topic...
It's just funny that my "old best friends" know me totally differently than how my "new best friends" do. Well, I assume some parts are fairly consistent - but I think my old best friends knew less about the real me than my new best friends do. I dunno it's weird...because my old best friends saw sides of me that Josh & Frank would never EVER see, lol. Okay I shouldn't say never - but it's HIGHLY UNLIKELY. And Josh & Frank have seen sides of me that my old best friends would, "WTF is WRONG with you?" to.
Jo knows about the most random facts about me - what songs make me melt into a puddle of mush or "my TYPE". YES JOSH, unfortunately lol...Jo, Alani, and Liliana know the 200 points quite well. They could spot "the type" from like 300 yards away with MIND bullets. [Yes, for those who don't know...i have a prerequisites list w/ 200 points on it. Blue weapons meet 50%, Purples meet 75%, and Oranges meet 95%. Don't ask to see the list - because I'd never show you. It's old and many times revised. LOL the percentages ARE accurate also.] They know where I wanted to get married but didn't, haha and what places around the world I want to visit. They know my favorite places on earth - and what I do when I'm afraid. LOL >.<
Josh and Frank would know what I'd want at chipotle or...if I'm uncomfortable around certain people. They'd know if people were interested in me, lol before i would even? Like the whole cyler thing? Yeah, there was a whole fucking parade coming out of left field from that one. Hmm what else...OH, they know about my video game thing - lol that I play...etcetc. Only Jerome really knew about that...and it was really on the dl even then. OH - and "Who's Q", they know about that.
It's just funny because the stuff that each group of friend knows - are pretty different. It's always been that way. I was friends with many different groups in high school - but i hung out with my best friends. None of the groups really knew about each other nor were alike - and that was okay.
I treasure all my friends' individuality. It makes me who I am. <3
Well i got sidetracked, sorry - but i have to get on KJ to play with osaka. We're hiding from NZ, lol <3.
<3 carpe diem <3
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+9:17 AM]*
xoxo~
Mmmm YUMMY.
I can't wait...it's the 9th and i'm leaving in 3 days. >.>
I'm so excited.
WE ARE puzzle fighter-ing, damnit.
SO xbox live wtf pwned my ass last night. For some reason - I get this mental block when I play against people I don't know. It's REALLY weird because I don't play nearly as well if I feel like I'm playing against someone [and you can tell]. Like USUALLY i plant bombs, do chains, counter attacks, even something simple as to immediately dropping the blocks.
Yeah for some reason, I just CAN'T do that when I play against people. /shrug lol i "forget" how. OH i mean - I HONESTLY forget how to do it...because I'm too anxious about playing against someone that I can't even think straight.
Damon's watching my gameplay like, "okay i know your hand hurts...but wtf are you DOING?" Why the hell did you put that there??
So yeah the last round - I tricked myself into believing that it was Shoji and Osaka on the other end of the xbox live thing. LOL...for some reason, with that frame of mind all the skills came back and the nervousness disappeared. Yeah I was wtfpwning HARD. The first game lasted 30ish seconds and the second game didn't even last 15.
Then Damon looked at me like, "OH man see now THAT was mean. You didn't even give him a chance." So what am i supposed to do - make the opponent THINK he has a chance of winning, then fucking obliterate his ass? Yeah that's real nice. Damon says I don't have to "obliterate" people in winning. I don't know how to play inbetween, damnit. I either pwn or don't try at all. I get really sad when I can't try.
It's boring not to obliterate someone. I practiced SO much at one point - that I could obliterate someone using Dan.
LOL playing against an aggressive player is intimidation enough. Haha - because when you start seeing their blocks fly down and planning their attacks quickly - it's scary for most people. I'm not afraid of it at all - because I play the opposite way against good people. Like, I just play defensively [osaka calls it paladinning] and just apparently "holy shield" and let them kill themselves essentially. So seeing people start rushing their attacks make me /giggle. They just start attacking me - and i just build off of whatever they send much like in tetris DS, and just send it back at them and /giggle. Either that or when they're about to attack me, i'll just attack them first to cancel their move. Yeah i'm a dick - lol.
Against some really good players primarily bombers/chainers I mix up the attacks to make it a bit more challenging - so they have different timed blocks to think about - not just a bomb to place. Fufe plays like that >.<...it's really scary. He'll look like he's about to die and 50 thousand bombs'll go off and all of a sudden his screen is empty and the opponents is full.
OH dehr...
OH YEAH back to my story, lol...
SO RIGHT AFTER my last puzzle fighter game...Sho texted me to check if everything was okay, haha. So i called him up and we chatted for a while.
Guys are SO mean and they don't even know it, lol. He says things like, "Hmmm maybe I should make a troll on Kil'jaeden...nah, I'd probably make a BE paladin. It'd be a secret and if people asked who I was, just tell them I was one of your friends from Kansai Japan."
POOP, SHOJI. POOP!
FIRST of all - I'm not a warlock on that damn server, lol. If you rolled a paladin, you're forcing me to lvl up my lock. Secondly, -_- you can't SAY stuff like that because it makes me all excited that you're coming back when you're really not.
Haha blood elf paladins do look pretty hot though. :P LOL i'm just biased because I like the judgement set on almost anything.
Haha, his friend is wearing oblivion...that's just cute.
I've NEVER seen the full t2 set on any female human. I should sign on azer and miichiie and try on his set. LOL? I wonder how it looks sometimes? I think it looks cute on boys /shrug i'm not sure about girls yet?
OH YEAH - i respecced RET...and apparently miichiie's waiting for bazington. I HATE waiting on guys, lol. They suck and play with my mind.
I really like the healing as holy. It's so effing mana efficient and divine favor is fucking hax. Hmm I really like dpsing as ret though. Two forms of CC and lotsa melee damage fun. My next respec is to try prot. Sho says that he thinks that I'll like that the best. /shrug? I've never really been that much into tanking though -_-...I'll do it alright, but I get stressed out with ktm's constant reminder that the dpsers are getting close, lol.
OKAY i KNOW it's different than warrior tanking. I don't like killing things slowly though...>.> Apparently blessing of sanctuary's fun sometimes. Oh yah, and holy shield.../shrug? -_- I don't know.
/sigh...gah we'll see.
LOL he also gave me some advice for WSG. "Michie if you're assisting the flag carrier...never BoP him...even if his health gets low. Just Blessing of Freedom/Heal him/LoH if you have to. BoP-ing him makes him drop the flag."
I've always wondered why flag carriers never get bopped. I haven't tried to bop someone yet, haha...but that was lol definitely good advice.
DAMN EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET SHOJI. -_-
brb Liz is having a dilemma, damn.
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Sunday, October 07, 2007-) +9:41 AM]*
xoxo~
SO yeah it's not broken - I just have a muscle contusion and a bruised bone, yay I guess.
You know what's funny? I don't really bruise at all...and I iced it for a long time after the hit, lol so It doesn't look like anythings wrong...but as soon as I take a little more effort typing or moving the mouse - i get these sharp throbbing OMFG STOP FREAKING MOVING YOUR HAND pains.
Since it's on my knuckle - they can't really give me a splint for it or anything. I'm just supposed to keep it elevated for a while & iced. PFT yah right. It's fine.
LOL i can't even make a light fist in that hand. Actually - I can't even type really w/o it feeling like ofuck stop it.
WELL - I guess It COULD be worse. I COULD have a broken hand on my trip to LA/Disney World.
Speaking of disneyworld, I wasn't as excited to go a few weeks ago...only because I'm not that much of a fan of family reunions. I dunno why my views changed in a few weeks - but I'm really excited to go now. Haha, well not really for the family reunion part - but the OMFG im going to disneyworld! I can't wait to see the animal kingdom, epcot center, and the resort we're staying at.
I was TRYING to decide what to dress up as for Halloween. I still can't decide. I kinda wanted to dress up as tinkerbell, but since I have short hair right now...thought that Snow White would be easier to pull off. Hmmm I dunno?
LOLOLOLLL THEN - I REMEMBERED that i OWN a star trek costume. LOL THAT I DIDN'T show to a LOT of people INCLUDING Frank because I didn't think he was into Star Trek and would think i was TOOOOOOOOTALLY weird. Yeah I dunno, I'm usually pretty good at guesstimating what people are into - my job as a student ambassador was to MAKE friends. For some reason, I couldn't tell with him, haha.
So back to the topic - NO i'm not dressing up as a star trek nerd for halloween this year. NO. It shows off too much cleavage and YEAH It's definitely not KOSHER for DISNEY WORLD. :P LOL??
OH GOD I HAVE A HEADACHE. Everytime I cry at nighttime, I always wake up with a fucking sinus migraine.
I saw bridge to tarabithia last night. Yeah it was a pretty good movie. LOL I'm not elaborating because it'll make me cry again. You'd just have to see it to understand. It's not a romance movie so don't worry. Well...sorta not a romance movie. It's not intended to be that kind of movie. Haha and the boy's a paladin, lol AWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.
Okay i'm going to take an excedrin and get ready. I think Josh wanted to get brunch or something today.../shrug?
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Friday, October 05, 2007-) +10:19 PM]*
xoxo~
OMGOMGOMGOMG! It's Jeremy's wedding tomorrow. That's just nuts.
It kinda still weirds me out that when someone asks who Damon is, I respond, "He's my boyfr...OH husband."
Dude we were together for 6 years before getting married. It's hard to change the "reference title" in under a year - it is for me at least.
I still call Koichi my exboyfriend, haha. HE will ALWAYS be the "EX-boyfriend". It's a constant reminder of one of the top reasons why I got married.
Yeah, I've never really talked about that one hmmm and It can probably be summed up in WoW terminology.
Um he was a pretty 1337 epic weapon...crusader enchanted and all. I didn't want the weapon anymore because the weapon proc absolutely SUCKED - it was too unpredictable [super high hot god this is wonderful dps sometimes and super shit i wanna stab you in the eye wtf is wrong with you sometimes fucking proc already crap].
I spent the rest of my dkp on an epic that was practical for dailies, an overall great pve progression weapon w/ higher stats. Anyway, long ago when I was geared in DEVOUT [aka when I WAS STUPID-ER], I didn't want to yearn for the high dps that was totally wrong for my spec anyway. So all in all - to be safe...I DE'D it JUST incase and sold the nexus crystals to some poor bloke who needed mats for a naxx attunement.
It just ended all chances of the ability to use the weapon at all, lol...and now that I'm 70 and there are 61 greens that are better than that epic as well as EPIC 70 weapons, it made the loss of the once 1337 lvl 60 epic weapon look totally insignificant.
LOL So, TECHNICALLY - all the other weapons [if there WERE any, which is improbable] in my inventory got DE'd at the same time as well. NOW THANK GOD, I didn't have a legendary weapon that was causing me trouble, because I think that would be the most painful to disenchant, LOL! I wouldn't DE it, lol that's just stupid. I'd probably stop playing WoW.
Well...even if I did have have a chance to get a legendary weapon, but I had already had a really good epic - honest to God, I probably wouldn't have looted and saved my dkp for a piece of gear I didn't own yet. I don't need a legendary weapon to progress through the game.
I know Josh, you're reading this like, "NO you WOULDN'T...you'd fucking take that legendary weapon and run baby, run. Burn baby, burn...Disco Inferno."
Honestly Joshua, I probably wouldn't roll on it. I'd love to, but I honest to God would rather have that last piece of t4 to complete my set over a legendary weapon that all the whole world is going to oogle at. That effing totally bugs me. People oogling at my gear makes me barf and brings the elitest outta me unfortunately - you have NO idea, lol. And plus, I had a weapon already that took plenty of raiding to get - I'm not going to DE it unless there's a fucking good reason to.
Wow I really don't feel like proofreading this tonight, haha. I hope that made sense.
OKAY IT'S TIME FOR BEDDY BYEBYE.
<3 carpe diem <3
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+5:27 PM]*
xoxo~
You have reached a new stage in life:
SAVE NOW?
YES NO
/sigh I had a surprisingly busy day and i'm pooped.
LOL i just meant to sign onto my newly revised resume email and check for responses/follow up w/ recruiters and continue my quests in the phantom hourglass.
OH NO, LIFE IS NOT that easy, haha.
I end up signing on preparing for a 1:40 interview w/ another bay area mmo company /barf, and disliking what i was hearing AGAIN. Hm - i CANT even remember the name of the company - i cared THAT MUCH. They're working on a casual mmo sim-like game also main targeting the korean market then gradually moving to the american market.
I don't wanna elaborate how I turned them down but this time, it was HONESTLY really easy to. Albert was right - I HAVE to be picky or else I'm going to be labeled as a producer that doesn't have a dev specialty. I need to focus on agile/six sigma/xtreme programming dev to start with at least.
THEN Apple recruiting called.
THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT APPLE, lol...OH ALL YOUR FAULT.
"We really like your experience, skill-set, and multilingual capabilities but we're really looking for someone with a MBA in Business Administration. You technically COULD get by in production w/ a BA IF you have extremely exceptional experience...which is not the case so, having a MBA would BE REALLY NICE."
...yeah /pwned by the elitest knowledge stick.
SO yeah, the point...lol, I talked to Michael Martin [who's now the dean of Cogswell, whoooda thunk??] and apparently I just need to take 2 classes to get my BA's mailed to me. A math class and a HU elective. SOOO, I'm going to take statistics and some sociology/demographic class and transfer it.
AND...at the same time...study my ass off for the GMAT, and apply for the 1 year accelerated MBA program at SJSU. I might need prereqs for the masters courses...GUH -_-.
SO we'll see... /shrug? I've thought about getting my masters for quite a while...just never followed through with it because It seemed like an unrealistic thought. According to Michael Martin...i was a lot closer than i thought, haha. XD
COOL.
Haha, I talked to Osaka about it for a while...and we put "epic weapons" into a new light.
michie: oh man >.> michie: he said that my experience was great but they were looking for a project manager with an MBA, DAMNIT. Osaka: well thats Apple for ya michie: i don't want my education to be a factor in my job eligibility...b/c that's something I can fix michie: right now, i'm just a green weapon. i wanna be a blue FREAKING weapon!! michie: UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGHHHHHH!!!! Osaka: ohohoh Osaka: you can be epic! michie: you can be epic, ZOMG! michie: lol michie: i'm just trying to be a blue for now michie: epic is so far away Osaka: hehe Osaka: right now i'm just white Osaka: :P michie: well technically i'm white too michie: until i finish these damn 2 quests michie: err classes lol Osaka: no wai Osaka: you've got experience already michie: soo? michie: that's a side thing Osaka: thats huge michie: that's like rep Osaka: haha Osaka: rep gets you epics! michie: not if you're only friendly! Osaka: lmao michie: maybe one day it will lol Osaka: then get exalted! michie: i'm tryyyyyyyyying >.< michie: the gnome +5 int isnt a big enough buff Osaka: hmm ohhh its big enuf Osaka: you cant have savagery on everything michie: -_- oh but savagery is so hax Osaka: ;O AND cheating! Osaka: study hard! Osaka: i'll root for you michie: -_-... Osaka: dude you got a full time game job at 21 while still going to school Osaka: taking extra classes for another degree should be a breeze Osaka: stop selling yourself short! michie: O_O Osaka: o_o-b michie: thanks osaka >.<
...and that's the end of it. :)
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Thursday, October 04, 2007-) +11:15 PM]*
xoxo~
OH HO HO GOD - JESUS...LORD.
Osaka and I sometimes play this unnamed game where we link each other random pictures kinda like - no moo's picture fight, but linked in gtalk.
Anyway - sometimes it gets REALLY gross.
Today the topic was random weird pillows. IT started out as a cute/funny thing.
I said I want the Boyfriend Pillow, lol because It's not that I don't have someone there - I just can't fall asleep easily if there's someone there.
michie: it's not that i'm lonely - because i'm not Osaka: lmao michie: it's just that i have trouble falling asleep with live people michie: haha michie: err living people Osaka: lmao wtf? michie: well not that i sleep with dead people michie: >.< lol michie: but i mean...the breathing/heartbeat keeps me awake Osaka: god i hope not
THEN - our game just snowballed downhill from the jlist link. Yulia Nova and Shemales were the BAD POINTS of that game. I didn't know who/what EITHER of them were.
DUDE I can guess what shemales are - but I didn't ever think there was a whole following of freaking hermaphrodite sex followers.
YEAH - I had to call Damon to close my browser as I held my hands up to cover my eyes.
I can take it - really haha I can! LOL but taking it requires adequate preparation! >.<
Okay I'm going to bed <3 Adios /wave
<3 carpe diem <3
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+12:09 PM]*
xoxo~
YAY i just got my ticket to LA <3.
Confirmation #: KTGGZ3
I had a dream last night that I forgot to type about this morning and it was NUTS.
It was all animated w/ the style from blood the last vampire and linkin park's - breaking the habit.
I'm going to write about it somewhat vaguely before I forget.
***
It starts out at my old elementary school. I was in the 5th grade running the mile with my classmates. My best friend at the time Rudy, was running with me. [I knew him as my IRL friend Rudy, but he didn't look like him or sound like him for that matter, it was just some random young kid that i don't know IRL but apparently did in my dream.] He was clearly distraught - so I asked him what was wrong. He confided in his parents about a lot of stuff that was bothering him and they felt it was necessary to move away. He told me what it was and ran away [well not away... but i stopped running the mile - and he just kept going...until he was out of sight].
[I don't remember what he said. It was like the first thing I forgot when I woke up...but I do remember watching his face as he ran away absolutely believing that it was the last time I was ever gonna see him again.] It was something pretty bad though - life changing.
I started running again...all by myself and somehow [DON'T ASK, i HAVE NO IDEA] i tripped and fell into a oldass well and was stuck at the bottom. My wings that usually got me out of everything could extend, but I couldn't fly upward because the well tapered as it got higher. As if it was designed so I couldn't fly away.
The murky water started at my knees and was slowly rising. I wasn't scared; just cold, wet, and [for some weird reason] only the well understood the feeling - as if the well was symbiotic and alive. I felt the well's heartbeat all around. I put my ear to the wall - and felt its pain.
The water came up to my chin...and slowly kept rising. I'm drowning and for some reason, and I've found solace in the well...almost accepting my fate. Like, it's killing me and I'm okay with it - /shrug? I dunno? Actually I think I was killing the well by just being there? >.< Er choking it or something. And it hurt me that the well was hurting - but I couldn't do anything to help it.
Anyway, the water goes waaay over my head and there's this glowing light at the bottom. I start sinking to the bottom - I think I'm dead but I have full control of my body - sorta. I'm sinking towards this little green glowing orb. I kneel on the ground underwater and pick up the glowing object. I see my friend inside - and automatically get teleported into the orb to him.
It's a mixed feelings thing - I'm so happy to see him but LIKE, he's happy to see me but he felt guilty seeing me or something. Like he felt responsible making me fall into the well losing my way and feeling sad + lost. He's an idiot - I was clumsy enough to fucking fall into a well in the middle of running a mile. Yeah WHO'S really the dumbass, lol?
I find out that my friend who I thought was STUCK in the orb, was really THE orb. His humanoid form was just something magical that he made up because we were friends and I kept him company. He was the well's heartbeat and...all the pain that the well was feeling was because it [or him...whatever] was alone.
As soon as I understood everything the green glowing gem split apart into two pieces: a smaller green gem and a smaller red gem. We were once again separated.
Then...this little tunnel opened up in the bottom of the Well...and i was sent on a wild current ride through it...to the bottom of this other identical well miles away.
Anyway...once again I was sad because we were apart - but then our gems made this light beam connection walkway thing through the pathway. The problem was...the fact that the beams were different colors - we couldn't be together? The beams hit each other, and we could like...walk to where the beams intersected, but there was this like force field keeping us apart.
Then I woke up, haha. Nuts huh?
<3 carpe diem <3
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+10:22 AM]*
xoxo~
Talking to Yuki makes me wanna give him a sedative and a hug.
Okay maybe not a sedative - but he has so much pent up frustration...Haha, I can't do anything else other than hear him out and laugh off the grumpy.
[10:23] kelvinpv: lol [10:25] kelvinpv: so whos #1 dps [10:25] hellokuty16: lol a shadowpriest [10:26] kelvinpv: wow who is this shadowpriest [10:26] kelvinpv: and why aren't you top dps [10:26] hellokuty16: i can't remember...i'm 2nd though XD [10:26] kelvinpv: michie you might as well quit if you can't top JR dps [10:26] kelvinpv: you have the best warlock gear in their guild [10:27] hellokuty16: -_- we went to gruuls [10:27] kelvinpv: oh enslaving duty? hehe [10:27] hellokuty16: yep [10:28] kelvinpv: gj on #2 then :) [10:28] kelvinpv: was the shadowpriest mcwhirter? lol [10:29] hellokuty16: WELL?! [10:29] hellokuty16: his gear isn't even close to any of the top 5 dpsing people [10:29] kelvinpv: NO [10:29] kelvinpv: even if he had the gear [10:29] kelvinpv: hes got no skill [10:30] hellokuty16: >.< [10:30] kelvinpv: haha
He's so spiteful! I don't understand. Like that person is 100% responsible for their ignorance. YUKI! They're ignorant to their wrongdoings sometimes. When you make a mistake, do you consciously KNOW that you're doing it? LOL People purposely aren't TRYING to suck in raids [well for the mostpart]. They just don't devote all the time in the world to WoW like you do. You can't blame people's ignorance - you can blame the lack of effort/laziness.
OH Yuki, Yuki, Yuki.
One day, that angry heart of yours is going to explode with frustration and hatred. LOL Don't be mad at people - it doesn't solve anything.
OH YEAH so haha:
[10:32] hellokuty16: despite the jr slow progression [10:32] hellokuty16: i really like their organization, raid signups, and their consistency [10:32] kelvinpv: lol [10:32] kelvinpv: they used to be like [10:32] hellokuty16: ? [10:32] kelvinpv: 2nd or 3rd guild on nz pre-bc [10:32] hellokuty16: REALLY??! I didn't think they were THAT great [10:32] kelvinpv: yeah either above or tied with divine fury [10:33] hellokuty16: haha XD i always thought they were a bunch of dorks that didn't take raiding seriously... haha thats what they acted like when i raided for jingy [10:33] kelvinpv: yeah but they still cleared the shit right? [10:33] hellokuty16: lol haha yah. :P
LOL WELL? I didn't know [OR CARE TO KNOW] what the guild rankings were on our server back then. I thought every large raiding guild was raiding MC, BWL, AQ40 and Naxx. LOL All my friends were?? Haha Gem/Shunfu raided MC, Gegsn and Osaka raided BWL like NO OTHER, Fufee & Jing raided AQ40, and Jingy - Tam - Walle - Marques etc etc raided Naxx, and I was friends with a bunch of JR...lol and they were always in those raids...so i figured everyone went. Haha...:P
OKAY you can't blame my noobness - haha i was a REALLY REALLY casual player.
<3 LOL ALREADY...
[10:47] kelvinpv: michie [10:47] kelvinpv: wtf why do you still have that crap [10:47] kelvinpv: goooooooo get a new weapon [10:47] hellokuty16: ...errrr the fucking mindblade won't drop [10:48] kelvinpv: arena one [10:48] kelvinpv: is better [10:48] hellokuty16: staff or blade [10:48] kelvinpv: blade [10:49] hellokuty16: oh alright -_-
God - half of it is motivating - honest to god, i do think it's refreshing to hear. Just...YOU have NO idea how much I hear it. People always give me their two cents and "try to be different" by being the guy that "has to tell it like it is" and "BE the BLUNT and mean one". It's not motivating when I get it from a lot of people. LoL, it makes me want to stop playing and give the middle finger to all the people who TELL me how to play my class - when they don't roll a lock themselves.
I'd never be mad at them - because i KNOW they're trying to stick out and be the "nice" guy that's looking out for me.
/sigh I'm not looking for a guy to look out for me. I'm looking for a friend that'll play alongside me. I think that's why I got along with Shoji so well. Because we thought alike - but he'd never judge my play style because he knew whatever I was doing - was because I was having a good time doing it. With the whole why change something you're happy with - mentality.
AND also riki and sho knew when to put their two cents in - when I did need direction. But they'd do it in a manner that wasn't degrading - that was helpful.
Like...
"Michie I know it's hard to fear a guy that has instant cast fear and you don't - but what can you do to make it harder for him to fear so it balances the fear casting field?" "OH! I guess i can CoT him? That's kinda weird - but it'll make his fear non instant..." "YUP! That's right :D...gogo be annoying to that lock!"
So yeah - it's not about having a "paladin". I just like paladins as a support class. It's about playing with people who you can grow with: playing with people that you can have fun progressing with.
:D /sigh...OMG I MISS THEM!! QQ!
Being around disgruntled angry dissatisfied people change me to be a nasty person! I'm trying hard to not to sponge it all - but it's all around, LOL!
Satisfied and Frustrated: my 2 main emotions. Sometimes I get the other emotions...like happy and/or sad, but overall...i think it's better that I don't get the large range of emotions - cuz when I do get happy or sad, it's special.
Hmm...i smile and laugh quite a bit, but my smiling and laughter is part of my whole "satisfied" mood. Hmm I look different when I'm genuinely happy...lol. My Mom says she can tell because I'm "glowing". Haha, whatever that means /shrug?
DO I GLOW?! LOL I WANNA SEE GLOWAGE? haha When I go down to visit my nomoos I think I get glow-y sometimes. I dunno - maybe not.
Now that I think about it, my "getting married" thought didn't even make me glow-y. What made me glow...was the fact that my family took the effort to fly from Japan, dress up in the traditional Japanese outfits, AND even perform [despite the silly song&dance thing that us Americans don't quite fathom].
I might seem like a ball of energy on the outside to some people. LoL to all those people who THINK they know what's going on inside me - their theories make me /giggle. I guess that's how I want it, haha so it works out.
I'm trying to think of really HAPPY or really SAD times. Hmm I think genuinely sad times are way easier to pick out, unfortunately.
1. When my friend passed away.
Hmm this really hurt at the time - but i tend to block out stuff that hurt this much pretty quickly. So even now, I never really stop to think/miss the person. It just doesn't suck that way. 2. When I cut my hair.
Yeah yeah, I know this sounds really shallow, but it honestly wasn't just cutting my hair that hurt. It was giving up that hurt. Everything in my life at the time was snowballing downhill and just SUCKING a nut - and this was the release. It hurt. 3. Shoji & Riki quitting WoW.
Oh yeah, this sucks. I don't wanna talk about it. 4. Everytime I leave Torrance.
Haha, yeah it doesn't hurt for that long...but as I'm leaving - I feel as though I'm leaving behind everything that makes me a better person. That these people DON'T NEED $$ and success to be happy people. It's just a "simply happy" feeling that I can't get anywhere else in life with anyone else. I dunno - i don't feel pressured to be someone else there - like, they already <3 me for me...even all the annoying little things. That's love. :)
Don't really want to add anymore. Now for happy things...
1. Gargie's Face
Haha, despite all the anguish this puppy puts me through - lol...everytime I look at his "HAAAAA I GOTCHA!" face, it makes me smile - but the semi-smile like i'm not supposed to be smiling. LOL the "OMAN Why'd you have to pee?! You were just outside! Stop looking cute! GAH" Smile...haha <3 He's worth all the anguish...i mean, hey he builds my patience. I'm leveling up w/o even trying. :P 2. Hmm going to SoCal
I don't stay happy the whole time there - i mean it switches to satisfied a LOT...but i get the happy feeling even just when thinking about them sometimes. 3. Being annoying.
LoL Yeah I have a WEIRD sense of humor sometimes...but being annoying brings joy to my heart sometimes. I'd rather deathcoil a paladin that's in the process of holy lighting someone than 2 shot him. 4. Clean clothes
There's something about clean clothes that make me genuinely happy for a bit, lol. I dunno why. 5. OH Japan...
Japan makes me happy. Hands down, I don't care HOW sad I was about ANYTHING - if I go there, I feel like everything else doesn't matter. 6. Genuinely nice people.
The person that holds the door open for you and the other people behind you. I DO THAT! I'll stand there and let everyone pass in front of me...to be polite and let them in. I DO THAT because It's the right thing to do. It's never about you - it's about everyone else in the world.
Hmm I don't pray for world peace. I pray for karma. If everything was peaceful and some type of chaos didn't exist - then we'd be living in nirvana. Nirvana's boring IMO, lol...and unfortunately survival realistically requires stimulus to many portions of the brain; Not just a continuous rush of endorphins.
Basically it applies to everything alive on earth. It would mean that our world would crumble because nothing would fight/compete for territory/food. Everyone would be satisfied with the "nothing" they "have" and starve to death causing a stunt in the evolutionary process.
In the end - we all die. LOL haha...that sucks. :P So yeah, my point is...i pray for karma, because the people who do good deeds deserve good things to happen to them in life.
Amen.
I gotta go - kevvy's bugging me. :P
<3 carpe diem <3
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(Wednesday, October 03, 2007-) +6:01 PM]*
xoxo~
OMG i love this game, lol.
I've been playing the phantom hourglass the whole afternoon. I just got the wind tablet & OMUGOD, "Prince of Red Lions Ship" hahaha <3 that's so effing awesome.
<3 carpe diem <3
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<3 carpe diem <3
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+8:33 AM]*
xoxo~
LoL, I had a dream last night. I laugh because it was a montage of memories...a bunch of major things my parent's had taught me.
Starting a new Middle School & leaving all my friends "The best view into a person's character is how they treat people who can't do them any good... and how they treat people who can't fight back."-Mom "You know that phrase, 'Guys think with their dicks?' Well at this age, they sure do...so just think with your imaginary dick so you know what they're thinking before they do."-Dad "Thinking with your dick is like thinking with your brain but two clicks down on the inhibitions, consequence, annddd - BLEH! It just makes you sorta drunk. Like you wouldn't usually make the same decisions in your right mind."-Dad
the Missy Mills fight. "Don't assume. Assumptions aren't factual."-Dad "You know you're making it easy for her to find reasons to be upset at you. She's finding reasons because she's a drama queen and they feed off of other people's anguish. Starve her by giving her healthy knowledge."-Mom
Graduating Middle School w/ high Honors & a Music Medal "Just because you're sitting up there in front of everyone doesn't mean that you're any more talented or special than any of them. What it means is that you TRIED harder than many of those other people...and THAT'S what got you there. Work = Success." -Mom "Be HUMBLE. There are so many talented people in the world. If you're good at something - it should show on its own without YOU having to explain." -Dad
Starting High School '98 "America has a 'What can you do for me' attitude. Don't be that person. Always be a 'What can I do for you?' person. Because In the end of the day, the reward of helping someone always outweighs any material item."-Mom "People might want you to do things for them to 'be their friends'. You know right from wrong. Make sure to pick your battles wisely. Some people might feel worth it - but in the end look at the bigger scope, could you see yourself relying on this person 10 years from now?" -Dad
Koichi, FPSA, FANIME'01, Family Members, Friends "There's a fine line between thoughtful and charitable [or overly-generous]. Don't be charitable, because this world just takes advantage of people who are." -Dad "You think Catholicism doesn't always make sense - but to me, YOU don't always make sense - but I have FAITH in god. Which is something that YOU should have too: faith in God, and faith in yourself." -Mom
There were more...but the more I try to remember my dream - the faster away the pictures disappear, :(.
It was quite a nice dream though :D. I woke up early and eager to take on the world - in a sense, hahaha. :) Despite all the overprotective nature that my parents have, I really appreciate all the grounding they've given me.
I tend to hide the caring inside, or try to at least. HOLY CRAP haha >.< I really needed that dream. :) It brought up everything happy in my day today. It almost felt as though despite all the downfalls I've gone through this year - overall, the downfalls aren't really THAT bad. Things could be a lot worse and I'm really lucky to have the people I do have in my life.
Thanks <3.
I should really call my Mom and say I <3 you. LoL, I'd call my Dad - but i HONESTLY don't feel like getting in an argument at 9am in the morning. It's just how we get along - lol sometimes unfortunate, most times really amusing. :)
/wave
<3 carpe diem <3
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Gez Fry